Venting My trial of a good life has ended

[TollieRobertis419]

Before I was financially stable, I have food everyday, I can travel to places, I was happy, and I had a lot of friends. Now the real struggle has begun after developing a mental illness, getting a financial crisis and losing good friends. Food is scarce so I'm hungry all the time now. The only places I can go to now is the kitchen, bathroom and my bedroom. My mind is filled with traumatic memories and I can no longer find joy in anything anymore. I've developed schizo and it lowers my quality of life drastically, can't get good sleep and disturbed by little things. I lost good friends and left with bad friends. I now have no one to talk to and vent my problems but can only talk to people who will gaslight and dismiss my problems and make me even more depressed. I'm not used to this. I was a spoiled kid who is used to things getting handed to him. I don't know how to survive. I'm just going to end up as prey for streetsmart people who grew up on the streets.

ITVs quote "Lions who grew up in captivity cannot survive in nature" hits different now

 

[Incelius Savage]

@mentalcel1 @NOfuture @faded @mistersinister brutal spoiled brat pill.

 

[Incelius Savage]

Can i ask how your parents went broke?

 

[Copexodius Maximus]

Schizo is worse than inceldom.

 

[TollieRobertis419]

Can i ask how your parents went broke?

A family member who is financially supporting us stopped sending us money after I made her upset when she found out that I broke stuff in her house when I had mental breakdown and I also have no grades to show for her because I stopped attending school due to depression (I broke my promise of showing her good grades from school and it made her extremely upset)

 

[Incelius Savage]

A family member who is financially supporting us stopped sending us money after I made her upset when she found out that I broke stuff in her house when I had mental breakdown and I also have no grades to show for her because I stopped attending school due to depression (I broke my promise of showing her good grades from school and it made her extremely upset)

Hell i dont blame her

 

[faded]

@mentalcel1 @NOfuture @faded @mistersinister brutal spoiled brat pill.

I would go ER on my parents rather than suffer that horrific fate of endless hell

 

[Incelius Savage]

Welcome to my World OP

 

[Deleted member 40252]

Schizo is worse than inceldom.

 

[lemon21]

A family member who is financially supporting us stopped sending us money after I made her upset when she found out that I broke stuff in her house when I had mental breakdown and I also have no grades to show for her because I stopped attending school due to depression (I broke my promise of showing her good grades from school and it made her extremely upset)

Can't you ask for forgiveness? Like bite your pride for a while and try to show her remorse and change, everything better than stave.

 

[TollieRobertis419]

Can't you ask for forgiveness? Like bite your pride for a while and try to show her remorse and change, everything better than stave.

This is like the 10th time I did it in her house, but this time she won't forgive me. I tried showing remorse and proving her that I will change but it didn't work.

Having revenge fantasies 24/7 really sucks man. Because it always makes you want to break shit for relief. And shit's hard to control because the traumatic memories is too intense sometimes.

I can tell my future is either ending up in a mental asylum or ending up as homeless. If I don't rope that is. And I don't even have the courage to rope because I'm too afraid to lose the all of the progress I've made in this life, the accumulated wisdom and my collection of good music, I don't want to throw everything away. And I feel like it's cucked because you're basically defeated by your bullies.

 

[lemon21]

This is like the 10th time I did it in her house, but this time she won't forgive me. I tried showing remorse and proving her that I will change but it didn't work.

Having revenge fantasies 24/7 really sucks man. Because it always makes you want to break shit for relief. And shit's hard to control because the traumatic memories is too intense sometimes.

I can tell my future is either ending up in a mental asylum or ending up as homeless. If I don't rope that is. And I don't even have the courage to rope because I'm too afraid to lose the all of the progress I've made in this life, the accumulated wisdom and my collection of good music, I don't want to throw everything away. And I feel like it's cucked because you're basically defeated by your bullies.

You need to show her that you will change. I also have a lot of revenge fantasies, but at the end that's what they all are. Fantasies. And even if you're at one point being able to do so, most probably you won't. Well i don't know your exact circumstances, but probably you won't.