turbosperg
PTSD ADD NW4 5'8½" 4/10 sperg
★★★
- Joined
- Mar 21, 2022
- Posts
- 3,743
my thERapist often said I should leave the house more, interact with people, talk, try and make friends, acquaintances etc. -- fair enough.
After wageslaving for 10 hours today in my remote job, I took a shower and did a two block walk for groceries. I left home little after six p.m.
Every person I passed on the streets I said "good evening" to (costumary where I live) but I often got no response, and the responses I got were very unenthusiastic. Meanwhile I would see people greeting each other enthusiastically all around me. This is an hour when people often walk the streets, going to Church or coming home from work.
Several people on the streets looked at me with disgust in their faces, including one faggot. Foids with children gave me more of a distressed look than a disgusted one. I was invisible and mute to two young foids I passed by (they didn't answer my "good evening") nor looked in my direction.
Then I went into two local stores.
First, to pick up fruits and vegetables. The foid cashier greeted me and was nice, but I felt out of place. The other male customer there looked at me with some derision, he made it obvious he didn't respect me.
Second store I went to buy some other products. The manager already despises me since an incident in which he sold a defective merchandise and refused to take it back. The foid cashiers were a landwhale and an ugly foid, they kept gossipping with each other and I was invisible to them.
I got an ice-cream cone in a third store on the way back home, the owner misheard what I said, so I had to repeat myself. I can only imagine how pathetic that is. The owner's kid at that store gave me such a disgusted cringy face I won't forget soon, she is absolutely repulsed by me.
Then I walked back home.
I never wished to disturb anyone's peace, or visit sensations of distress, disgust and rising vomit in anyone, I just wanted to do what normal people do -- a neighborhood grocery run and greeting neighbors along the way. But I'm too weird and autistic for that. They seem to be afraid I might turn out to be some sort of monster, like a serial rapist or something even worse -- an incel.
I was coping in peace before I left, now I am truly depressed and disturbed. I wish I could stay another week inside, and I probably will.
Now I ask my brothers here in .is :
------- how on Earth is such a series of awkward and negative social interactions supposed to help me get better?
------- how am I supposed to improve in any way by getting mogged, humiliated, ignored, and receiving expressions of disgust everywhere I go?
------- how is it possible for a sperg like me to get any unpaid positive social interactions with anyone?
how_to_disappear_completely.mp4
Thanks
After wageslaving for 10 hours today in my remote job, I took a shower and did a two block walk for groceries. I left home little after six p.m.
Every person I passed on the streets I said "good evening" to (costumary where I live) but I often got no response, and the responses I got were very unenthusiastic. Meanwhile I would see people greeting each other enthusiastically all around me. This is an hour when people often walk the streets, going to Church or coming home from work.
Several people on the streets looked at me with disgust in their faces, including one faggot. Foids with children gave me more of a distressed look than a disgusted one. I was invisible and mute to two young foids I passed by (they didn't answer my "good evening") nor looked in my direction.
Then I went into two local stores.
First, to pick up fruits and vegetables. The foid cashier greeted me and was nice, but I felt out of place. The other male customer there looked at me with some derision, he made it obvious he didn't respect me.
Second store I went to buy some other products. The manager already despises me since an incident in which he sold a defective merchandise and refused to take it back. The foid cashiers were a landwhale and an ugly foid, they kept gossipping with each other and I was invisible to them.
I got an ice-cream cone in a third store on the way back home, the owner misheard what I said, so I had to repeat myself. I can only imagine how pathetic that is. The owner's kid at that store gave me such a disgusted cringy face I won't forget soon, she is absolutely repulsed by me.
Then I walked back home.
I never wished to disturb anyone's peace, or visit sensations of distress, disgust and rising vomit in anyone, I just wanted to do what normal people do -- a neighborhood grocery run and greeting neighbors along the way. But I'm too weird and autistic for that. They seem to be afraid I might turn out to be some sort of monster, like a serial rapist or something even worse -- an incel.
I was coping in peace before I left, now I am truly depressed and disturbed. I wish I could stay another week inside, and I probably will.
Now I ask my brothers here in .is :
------- how on Earth is such a series of awkward and negative social interactions supposed to help me get better?
------- how am I supposed to improve in any way by getting mogged, humiliated, ignored, and receiving expressions of disgust everywhere I go?
------- how is it possible for a sperg like me to get any unpaid positive social interactions with anyone?
how_to_disappear_completely.mp4
Thanks
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