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Serious My sanity is collapsing - about my previous thread

Eternatus

Eternatus

I shall surrender to the darkness beneath me
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Feb 6, 2024
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It’s 2am now but this night it’s working strangely. I wake up suddenly with the same turmoil of emotions and anguish. This time because of my bad dreaming. My dreams are suffocating guilt trips.

I feel low iq mentioning this but it matters cause images and sensations I process are symmetrical to a posthumous bodily numbness due to the personal implications they cause. It would be useless to describe exactly what I see but I think I am developing a schizoaffective disorder or something similar.

I still feel that incessant flow of cortisol and the weight of my conscience, my appearance is getting worse every day my hair grows twisted obliquely i have an aggravated kyphosis and i am starting to lose touch with reality and with time as i go on with my wageslave job, repeating the same actions.

What I’m feeling is analogous to the course of events in the movie "Requiem for a Dream". I don't feel lost, I’m burning from the inside.

Hell is real and i am feeling it right now. I can't put into words the turmoil, the restlessness, the silent torment my body is going through, i wouldn't wish it on anyone.
 
You still have sanity
 

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