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Might Get Kicked Out

Waylan

Waylan

Recruit
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Joined
Nov 30, 2021
Posts
162
A while ago I posted that I was being pushed to attain employment otherwise I'm going to get kicked out. Well, it appears that's gonna come sooner than I thought. Last night, I got really depressed and decided to get drunk. While I was drunk, I punched a massive hole in the wall. The hole doesn't even look like it was punched. It's about 7 inches tall and 4 inches wide in size. It's drywall so it breaks easy.

While I was asleep my faggot brother ratted me out to my mom and she freaked out on me. She said I'm getting kicked out soon and I won't be getting anything for Christmas. I'm not on good terms with any extended family and I don't have any friends so I'm going to become homeless. The only place I have to go is my dad's but I can't live there because he's extremely abusive. It's a living hell just being around him.

I don't know what to do. It seems like the only way out is to commit suicide but I'm too scared of death to do that. Just imagine if I simply got a foid I wouldn't be in this mess in the first place.

I'm tired dude, I'm fucking tired. This entire year has been a walking nightmare and you can bet your ass the next one won't be any better. I've never been so miserable before in my life. I literally have no motivation to do anything. I just lay in bed for hours on end because I don't care anymore. I'm having bad days so I don't care.

Whatever.
 
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May I Ask How Old You Are ?
 
Over for you boy.
Can't you rent your own apartment with neetbuxx or a job?
 
20

I'm still trying to get a job. The only money I have is from birthday's and Christmas'.
I'm Sorry To Hear That But Hey Look On The Bright Side You Could Be Me And Still Be 19 That Would Probably Suck More Than Getting Kicked Out Okay I'm Kidding But Since Your Done High School Unlike Me You Could Spend More Time Trying To Get A Job Which I Would Imagine Is Hard To Get Also Are You Interested In College ?
 
Try to book a hotel with a sufficient height spend the night there carefully writing a suicide note and jump straight head first down, hopefully all your misery will end upon death itself.
That’s my ending probably, I really consider doing something like that I sunk to deeply, too deeply:feelsrope:
 
I'm Sorry To Hear That But Hey Look On The Bright Side You Could Be Me And Still Be 19 That Would Probably Suck More Than Getting Kicked Out Okay I'm Kidding But Since Your Done High School Unlike Me You Could Spend More Time Trying To Get A Job Which I Would Imagine Is Hard To Get Also Are You Interested In College ?
Yeah but I am but I need to save up more money.
Try to book a hotel with a sufficient height spend the night there carefully writing a suicide note and jump straight head first down, hopefully all your misery will end upon death itself.
That’s my ending probably, I really consider doing something like that I sunk to deeply, too deeply:feelsrope:
Too scared.

Quick update: I had a chat with her after she calmed down. She said she doesn't know if I'm going to get kicked out but I do need to fix it. The wall is huge so I'm going to have to trace over the hole, chip off the extra dryall, install two boards behind it, screw in a piece of sheetrock onto the boards, duct tape it and scrap over some drywall material 2-3 times.

I don't want to be put in a situation where I fix it and then get kicked out. But then again I don't have much of a goddamn choice.
 
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I've also been pushed to get employed or face homelessness:

Yes, true. When I was eighteen, I attempted to apply for jobs. However, I could barely do the interviews because of my stuttering problem(ASD-caused). My mother wanted me to get employed despite knowing about my disability("You should get a job", "When you become an adult, I want you gone!").

The result was living in a youth commune for some time...

By that point, I had already spent months sleeping in the basement of our apartment to recover from my first mental breakdown.
 
Yeah but I am but I need to save up more money.

Too scared.

Quick update: I had a chat with her after she calmed down. She said she doesn't know if I'm going to get kicked out but I do need to fix it. The wall is huge so I'm going to have to trace over the hole, chip off the extra dryall, install two boards behind it, screw in a piece of sheetrock onto the boards, duct tape it and scrap over some drywall material 2-3 times.

I don't want to be put in a situation where I fix it and then get kicked out. But then again I don't have much of a goddamn choice.
You greycels still have hope inside you, some of us building the courage to end it all
 
It's 6 in the fucking morning where I'm at and I've only gotten an hour of sleep(yeah my sleep schedules ass, whose isn't?). My mother woke me up with a bitch attitude telling me to take out the trash, saying that I filled it up. Nevermind asking around to see who filled it up or just doing it yourself, nope, missy just assumes it me and that's it. After I get done with it I ask her what her problem is and she says done doing basic motherly things like doing dishes or doing laundry. She seems to struggle with these things #TheStruggleIsReal

She proceeds to fuss at me over a job despite having applied at over 10 places. She says she's not going to drive me to an interview on Friday despite being the only form of transportation I have. I tell her I'm not going if you don't take me and then she says I'll have to figure it out on the street. I don't know what she expects. When your son doesn't have transport you should provide it for him. Also I have autism so you breathing down my neck about employment probably isn't going to help.

During our little spat she tried to shut out any counter arguments (she needs to get the last word). I stared at her a little bit and even that got her riled up. Poor baby. She also woke my brother up to do the dishes.

I don't know why she has to get so mad. I'm sorry for punching a massive hole in the wall and everything but can't you just throw me a bone? I was fucking drunk and depressed at the time. She seems oblivious to my situation and shrugs off my alleged laziness as just being a leech.

She's always been a bitch. Nevermind me being a little shit, she's always had a habit of getting nasty and snapping over the smallest things. Over the past year I've developed severe anger issues so I know at some point I'm gonna hit her. I don't when and how, but it's coming.
You greycels still have hope inside you, some of us building the courage to end it all
Give it more time.
 

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