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Last day of seminar; want to ask a girl out, but I already know it's over

Incel801 said:
Prob hard to do, but I would try to be actually be friends with some of these women so you can see what the difference is btw friend zone and actuall romantic interest.

In my case I always saw signs of Interest where there wasn't any because I had not ever seen those REAL signs pointed at me. What changed my Outlook and was a source of my eventual blackpill was watching women "friends" I had show romantic interest in guys and comparing how they treated other men in "friend zone", meanwhile I was just her "bestie" so she didn't hide any of this behaivor around me.

As you know, I've been "friends" (oribiting) with some women before that I was romantically interested in. I definitely didn't stick around with the girl and some Chad though, so I did not have the opportunity the way you did. You make a great point about the signals; I wrote about this in another thread where I kind of came to the same conclusion:

blickpall said:
I would say that I'm not great at picking up on attraction signals, largely because I have no clue if I've ever seen one. I am pretty adept at picking up on "don't bother me" signals because I see those everywhere. It's so hard to tell if what I am perceiving is genuine or contrived by my anxiety, because right now I feel like every person I see has the "don't bother me" aura and none have the "I'd like to chat" aura, so I just let things happen TO me as opposed to me going out and doing anything. My everyday surroundings are people either commuting or in a classroom, no one ever chatting or looking receptive, ever. When I go to bars, there are almost never any single women that I can identify, and if they are then they are in groups and despite having read PUA stuff years ago, I just don't approach because they too seem absorbed in their social interactions so I don't want to "interrupt."





Incel801 said:
Women are VERY good at making guys think they have a chance, I think this is instinctual recource gathering behaivor. Our cave man brothers were going through the same shit 20000 years ago. The difference in thier behaivior is very very subtle, but unmistakable. Friend zone is what can this guy to for me, fuckzone is what can I do for this guy..

Holy shit, that is brilliantly written.
 
Incel801 said:
Women are VERY good at making guys think they have a chance, I think this is instinctual recource gathering behaivor. Our cave man brothers were going through the same shit 20000 years ago.  The difference in thier behaivior is very very subtle, but unmistakable.  Friend 

exactly

read "sperm wars"
 
@blickpall

The fb photo situation is unfortunate and will look awkward but it is what it is, maybe you can check if she has an insta or twitter and try to gather more info before you dive in the dms
 
IronMike said:
The fb photo situation is unfortunate and will look awkward but it is what it is, maybe you can check if she has an insta or twitter and try to gather more info before you dive in the dms
I put up a new one, and it was actually in my "private" album so while the fact that I changed it seems recent, it says it was uploaded a while ago (not TOO long ago) so that's a plus. Because it has a baby raccoon in it, it already has 20 likes, even though about 90% of them are from dudes (because obvious social circle). So, I feel a little more like a full normie and less like an aspie when I send her a message. I'm still debating if I should bother her now when it's a study day before a finals day (I have one at 8 am tomorrow for example) or if I should wait 3 days until Saturday but I am pretty sure I'm overthinking it, but by the same token I'm not sure if I only think that because I'm actually underthinking it... Fuck I need to stop lol I sound like a crazy person when I try to reason.
 
dr-problematic said:
u r speakin like u rnt in same bout, or r u

I've asked a few women out before if that's what you mean, but have been incel for well over a year and have never got laid in my home country (the cucked UK). I never got laid in my younger years and it's fucked me up completely mentally so that's why I'm saying it's over, even if this girl says yes it'll never replace all those lost years and OP is always gonna be mentally fucked from it.

My only success was as a white guy in South-East Asia but that feels like a lifetime ago now. I'm back in the UK permanently so it's over for me.


blickpall said:
I put up a new one, and it was actually in my "private" album so while the fact that I changed it seems recent, it says it was uploaded a while ago (not TOO long ago) so that's a plus. Because it has a baby raccoon in it, it already has 20 likes, even though about 90% of them are from dudes (because obvious social circle). So, I feel a little more like a full normie and less like an aspie when I send her a message. I'm still debating if I should bother her now when it's a study day before a finals day (I have one at 8 am tomorrow for example) or if I should wait 3 days until Saturday but I am pretty sure I'm overthinking it, but by the same token I'm not sure if I only think that because I'm actually underthinking it... Fuck I need to stop lol I sound like a crazy person when I try to reason.

You're definitely overthinking this shit. If she likes you she'll say yes no matter what you do, what time of day you ask or any of the shit you're thinking about now. She's a femoid so she probably has at least 500 friends on facebook, chances are she's not even gonna look at your profile, and if she does she won't care.

But it's unlikely she's gonna say yes. For 2 reasons:

1) You're clearly not 8+, or you wouldn't be a 28 year old posting on here. That alone means she's likely to reject you.

2) You've also not had the balls to ask her in person, despite presumably being in classes with her for several months. This makes you look like a massive pussy, which contrary to what some people think on here matters a lot if you're in the 5-7 range. It's also a bit weird if you never spoke to her in class, but then just randomly add her facebook at the end and ask her out.

If you're in the 1-4 range she'd have said no regardless of what you did.
 
itsOVER said:
You're definitely overthinking this shit. If she likes you she'll say yes no matter what you do, what time of day you ask or any of the shit you're thinking about now. She's a femoid so she probably has at least 500 friends on facebook, chances are she's not even gonna look at your profile, and if she does she won't care.

Good call. Thanks for bringing me back to ground on that.

itsOVER said:
But it's unlikely she's gonna say yes. For 2 reasons:

1) You're clearly not 8+, or you wouldn't be a 28 year old posting on here. That alone means she's likely to reject you.

Facts.

itsOVER said:
2) You've also not had the balls to ask her in person, despite presumably being in classes with her for several months. This makes you look like a massive pussy, which contrary to what some people think on here matters a lot if you're in the 5-7 range. It's also a bit weird if you never spoke to her in class, but then just randomly add her facebook at the end and ask her out.

Also true. I only really developed an interest in her when she presented for the first time about half-way through the course, because I pretty much handn't seen her face up until then due to the way the seats are. We spoke very briefly once or twice when we were seated next to one another after coming in late, that's about it, not worth mentioning but she at least knows I exist. What you're saying is true in that I was too much of a pussy to ask her, get rejected, and then continue coming to lecture with her there. I think I mentioned this here but it might have been in another thread, but I get extremely paranoid in situations like these because I feel like I am one wrong move from fucking up my whole life. What if this girl accuses of me stalking her or something? Of course we have the same course, so that doesn't really fly, but what if she thinks that way of me? What if she just says it's harassment and it becomes her word vs. mine? I would never win and my life would be over.

Now that I think about it, messaging her on Facebook doesn't really even avoid that problem at all. Although I guess online I can take time to make sure that what I say is as bluepilled as possible so as to avoid potential misinterpretations. Either way, yes, I couldn't bear the thought of getting rejected and having to face that rejection twice a week, so I didn't even consider that as an option and didn't really plan anything at all until the day of (when I made OP).

itsOVER said:
If you're in the 1-4 range she'd have said no regardless of what you did.
I'd say I'm around a 4 and she's around a 5-6. Her FB pictures are obviously +1-2 points from her IRL but I still wouldn't consider her my exact looksmatch. I'm definitely aiming a little bit up here. So I guess I really might not have anything to lose, as long as I get over the paranoia of being labelled a woman harasser.
 
Well, it's not like you have anything particularly to lose. But I remember being at uni and planning all this shit out to the minutiae level of detail. What happens (just like happened here) is that some tiny thing doesn't go the way you planned it in your mind, and you use that as an excuse to rationalise yourself out of it, then you can comfort yourself with the thought 'well I WOULD have asked her, but random chance stopped me from doing so'. That's why I only ever asked out like 3 girls at uni (1 said yes but it never went anywhere and I graduated KHV).

I feel the chance of success is low enough that there's really no point asking here. You're aiming above your looksmatch in a marketplace where it's only women who get to do that. You also come across as a pussy because you didn't ask her in person and waited until the end of the course to do so. All women want Chad, and if you don't look like Chad, you're gonna have to at least act like Chad, and Chad wouldn't sit around for months in fear of rejection.

With that said clearly feel free to ignore what I'm saying since obviously my 'strategy' never got me laid at uni. It just feels pretty unlikely, that's all.
 
do it or no balls. Worst that can happen is black pill is reinforced or whatever.
 
itsOVER said:
Well, it's not like you have anything particularly to lose. But I remember being at uni and planning all this shit out to the minutiae level of detail. What happens (just like happened here) is that some tiny thing doesn't go the way you planned it in your mind, and you use that as an excuse to rationalise yourself out of it, then you can comfort yourself with the thought 'well I WOULD have asked her, but random chance stopped me from doing so'. That's why I only ever asked out like 3 girls at uni (1 said yes but it never went anywhere and I graduated KHV).
I feel the chance of success is low enough that there's really no point asking here. You're aiming above your looksmatch in a marketplace where it's only women who get to do that. You also come across as a pussy because you didn't ask her in person and waited until the end of the course to do so. All women want Chad, and if you don't look like Chad, you're gonna have to at least act like Chad, and Chad wouldn't sit around for months in fear of rejection.
With that said clearly feel free to ignore what I'm saying since obviously my 'strategy' never got me laid at uni. It just feels pretty unlikely, that's all.

No, I think you're conceptually correct on all counts here. By the same token though, you're also giving me another "out" - "Yea, dudes on forums said it was pointless, so I'm not gonna."

BlaKdaGGeRz said:
do it or no balls. Worst that can happen is black pill is reinforced or whatever.

There is also this to consider. Can't really argue it.
 
Not to be rude but OP, if you actually think you have a chance to get even with a girl 1 point below you, you should quickly change your username to bliepull. Truth is this girl is actually fucking Chad in the weekends. Whatever words you mumbled to her entered one ear and came out of the other, you don't have any impact to remain in her memory for more than 30 seconds. I'm going to bet my house on it, talk to her again and I bet she doesn't even remember who the fuck you are. LoL, I really laugh when I see that most self proclaimed blackpilled incels are the most bluepilled ones. Not being rude again, just stating observations. If you want to have success with a girl, you need to dive the dumpster or you're going to remain on the incel path forever and a day.
 
Cannon Fodder said:
Not to be rude but OP, if you actually think you have a chance to get even with a girl 1 point below you, you should quickly change your username to bliepull. Truth is this girl is actually fucking Chad in the weekends. Whatever words you mumbled to her entered one ear and came out of the other, you don't have any impact to remain in her memory for more than 30 seconds. I'm going to bet my house on it, talk to her again and I bet she doesn't even remember who the fuck you are. LoL, I really laugh when I see that most self proclaimed blackpilled incels are the most bluepilled ones. Not being rude again, just stating observations. If you want to have success with a girl, you need to dive the dumpster or you're going to remain on the incel path forever and a day.

Thank you for your feedback, and of course you are right in general. I know it. But that doesn't mean that desperation doesn't foster hope and thus action, especially when there is nothing left to lose.

Anyhow, update:

I messaged and added her on Facebook a couple of days later on the weekend. She didn't respond until Wednesday, at which point she accepted my friend request and told me how she did on the exam (answered my question). I respond back, and she didn't even read it for 17 hours. Then she read my response and didn't respond back, about 3 hours ago. Not really that upset about it all, because it is the expected outcome.
 
blickpall said:
Conceptually, I know you are both right. There are no Chads in this seminar (only like 20 people in it total and only 5 males including myself lol, in fact I think that I might actually not be the ugliest in this group because STEM branch), so maybe it's because there was no one for her to show interest in or because she has Chad back home, but she truly seems like a high-inhib person like me. Barely speaks, never raises hand but knows the answers when called upon, generally looking down/has that honest "shy" girl vibe, etc. I know it's all an illusion, but the brain picks up on these non-factors and bundles them together in little lie packages with cute little bows that I think about randomly and the thoughts combine with desires and it turns into a new, fully autonomic self-delusion.

Fuck my brain, fuck my life.

kek

You know she's a hoe deep down like any other female, then just go for it, what do you have to lose

Just don't be a beta
 
anon_899 said:
kek

You know she's a hoe deep down like any other female, then just go for it, what do you have to lose

Just don't be a beta

You can read the outcome above your current post.
 
blickpall said:
Thank you for your feedback, and of course you are right in general. I know it. But that doesn't mean that desperation doesn't foster hope and thus action, especially when there is nothing left to lose.

Anyhow, update:

I messaged and added her on Facebook a couple of days later on the weekend. She didn't respond until Wednesday, at which point she accepted my friend request and told me how she did on the exam (answered my question). I respond back, and she didn't even read it for 17 hours. Then she read my response and didn't respond back, about 3 hours ago. Not really that upset about it all, because it is the expected outcome.

Just give up lad, she isn't interessed in you

Why didn't try with a uglier girl thought?
 
anon_899 said:
Just give up lad, she isn't interessed in you

Why didn't try with a uglier girl thought?

Attraction isn't a choice.
 

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