If this were true, then autistic women who pretend they want an equal relationship would be justified in not wanting to date most men with autism because they would have better social skills than those men.
But it isn't true.
Statistically, autistic men are far more likely to be high functioning than autistic women. Basically, for those who are low functioning the gender ratio is 1.7 boys to each girl. However, for those that are high functioning, the ratio is 5.75 boys to each girl. If you look at only the data for those who are HF, you would conclude that it is a syndrome prevalent mainly in males.
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Men are actually substantially over-represented among high-functioning cases, and males and females are more equally represented among low functioning cases [8,9,10,11]; a 1999 review reported median sex ratios of 6:1 among normal-functioning subjects and 1.7:1 among cases with moderate to severe ID" (
source)
This chart shows that in spite of the fact that autistic women are far more likely to be low functioning, their reproductive success is more than twice as high as that of autistic men. If one were to only include the milder cases, the sex difference would be even more pronounced. It's entirely possible that women with high functioning autism are 4 -6 times more likely to reproduce than men with high functioning autism.
That's because the standards for socially acceptable behavior are far lower for women than they are for men, not because they supposedly have better social skills.
If a man wants to make himself look weak and socially stunted, all he has to do is imitate the more passive and emotional communication style of women. Men and women both are usually very judgmental of men in social situations but tolerant of women.
Women are not expected to take the initiative in courtship or social interactions with men. When a man approaches a woman, the onus is on him to be charismatic and funny. The woman isn't expected to say anything interesting. She doesn't even have to be polite or to smile. As long as she gives him positive reinforcement, he will be happy with her, regardless of what she does or says. Most men will blame themselves if they get treated badly by women or fail to sustain a conversation.
This study is especially valuable because it specifically compared the social skills of women with high functioning autism to those of men with the same disorder. It completely refutes the theory that high functioning autistic women have better social skills.
