First and foremost I'd like to thank this forum for accepting me. After lurking for quite some time I staunchly feel closer with many of you than I have even my own families. I enjoy the humor, empathize with your struggles, and valiantly keep up with the intellectual discussions, ranging from basic socioeconomic hypothesis to advanced genetic cellular biology; all finalized in an incel wrap-up to help us understand and cope with out condition. I look forward to my time spent on this forum.
My first post is about painful emotions within me, emotions that have been festering since my I got my first fake ID and started going to clubs. There's nothing that drives me crazier than seeing people making out at the club, especially when they're out in the open and not making an effort to conceal their pseudo-sexual acts. I'm a KV, and as "cucked" or bluepilled as it may sound I want to experience making out more than I do sex. I feel sex would not be too different to masturbation, but making out is something unimaginable for me... what does it feel like? Does it fill your body with a spark of lust? The mouth is directly on the face, our most sensitive part, and for that I believe making out to be more intimate than sex, even from a strictly physical manner.
Going up to countless girls and see them turn away from me, only do share their tongues with someone taller and better looking than me a few seconds after, it fills me with indescribable sadness. It is almost as if the Universe is saying "life is not fair, you were not born like him, and because of that, you can only watch him experience pleasure that you are so desperate for". The fact that society is so focused on fairness and equity but when it comes to one of the most fundamental human experiences, the overarching message is merely "NO, THIS IS NOT FOR YOU, YOU MUST ONLY WATCH!".
PDA is abuse, it's a form of torture for those starved of such experiences. I told myself "this time could be different" for 4 years.... 4 years of going out and being turned down everytime. This includes bars, clubs, concerts, and house parties.... and I've never ONCE touched a foid. After the break, this will be my last semester, the final frontier of my youth... and it was all for nothing.
My first post is about painful emotions within me, emotions that have been festering since my I got my first fake ID and started going to clubs. There's nothing that drives me crazier than seeing people making out at the club, especially when they're out in the open and not making an effort to conceal their pseudo-sexual acts. I'm a KV, and as "cucked" or bluepilled as it may sound I want to experience making out more than I do sex. I feel sex would not be too different to masturbation, but making out is something unimaginable for me... what does it feel like? Does it fill your body with a spark of lust? The mouth is directly on the face, our most sensitive part, and for that I believe making out to be more intimate than sex, even from a strictly physical manner.
Going up to countless girls and see them turn away from me, only do share their tongues with someone taller and better looking than me a few seconds after, it fills me with indescribable sadness. It is almost as if the Universe is saying "life is not fair, you were not born like him, and because of that, you can only watch him experience pleasure that you are so desperate for". The fact that society is so focused on fairness and equity but when it comes to one of the most fundamental human experiences, the overarching message is merely "NO, THIS IS NOT FOR YOU, YOU MUST ONLY WATCH!".
PDA is abuse, it's a form of torture for those starved of such experiences. I told myself "this time could be different" for 4 years.... 4 years of going out and being turned down everytime. This includes bars, clubs, concerts, and house parties.... and I've never ONCE touched a foid. After the break, this will be my last semester, the final frontier of my youth... and it was all for nothing.
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. And being around them when they started making out was just 
