In my rage phase again

[fullofchagrin]

I hadn't been angry in a while, i just saw a video that triggered it. I wish I could go ER on my bullies and my teachers who allowed them to bully me. I was so smart as a kid and had good grades, in the country i went to school in there is a grade system, i got the highest grade, which 10% of students get (national average). No one in my entire class got the same grade and most got grades well below the national average. I was bullied for years by those low IQ scum who talked about rap music and criminals all the time just because I was autistic and not as macho as them and was socially awkward and didn't know how to stand up for myself. I am so stupid now and a NEET because i can't do anything anymore, i could have been a very productive member of society if things had gone a different way, i have always been interested in science. But i am a beaten down NEET, Probably several of them are criminals maybe even jihadists now and that is the type of people that western societies reward. Fuck everyone in this world. I hope muslims and indians keep breeding and take over europe by sheer numbers and then have a civil war between themselves and as a result exterminate the human race. I feel so powerless. TED (total everyone death)

 

[Grodd]

I'm always angry tbh but contain it most of the time

 

[fullofchagrin]

I often catch myself subconsciously fantasizing about murdering my childhood bully and then i cringe at myself because of how powerless and weak i am and i fantasize about something that will never happen. That guy was like the ''boss'' of the other ones, he was especially stupid, i remember seeing him crying when he learned that he got the lowest grade, i was really surprised because i had always seen him as strong and never saw him crying before that. He had to redo the year like 2 times so he was also older and stronger than everyone else, and he was also very social, even all the teachers liked him and he pretty much knew and was friends with EVERYONE in that school. Even though he also bullied and sometimes beat up other kids the teachers never stopped liking him

 

[Divineone]

often catch myself subconsciously fantasizing about murdering my childhood bully and then i cringe at myself because of how powerless and weak i am and i fantasize about something that will never happen.

Relatable

 

[fullofchagrin]

Relatable

I am so weak and powerless, let alone kill anyone, or even confront anyone, when I am called by my doctor my heart starts beating really fast as I try to get the courage to pick up the phone and it gets to a point where i can hear my own heart beating, i keep procrastinating for weeks and eventually get my mom to call the doctor for me (or sometimes just not at all and i live with my medical conditions) LMAO fml

 

[Divineone]

when I am called by my doctor my heart starts beating really fast as I try to get the courage to pick up the phone and it gets to a point where i can hear my own heart beating

Woah mang that's brutal

 

[fullofchagrin]

I think I am going to start supporting Israel again for a few weeks until my rage calms down

 

[Deleted member 8078]

I often catch myself subconsciously fantasizing about murdering my childhood bully and then i cringe at myself because of how powerless and weak i am and i fantasize about something that will never happen.

So relatable holy shit. We could probably do it with a proper weapon equipped, but what's the point? Ultimately you're just gonna lose your anal virginity in prison and be rotting there even worse than right now.

 

[Divineone]

I think I am going to start supporting Israel again for a few weeks until my rage calms down

Bruh

 

[fullofchagrin]

So relatable holy shit. We could probably do it with a proper weapon equipped, but what's the point? Ultimately you're just gonna lose your anal virginity in prison and be rotting there even worse than right now.

I would probably start shaking so badly that I would drop my weapon as I approached him and then he would beat me up again. And then humiliated to everyone again. But I don't even know where I could find him anyway

 

[Knajjd]

No idea what this poem means but I've posted it anyway as it seems relevant.



Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

 

[fullofchagrin]

No idea what this poem means but I've posted it anyway as it seems relevant.



Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Dying Light reference