I've been playing the game since i was 11 all the way back in the early alphas when the grass was bright green, When I play the older versions and music starts playing such as the track "mice on venus", "dry hands" or "clark" sometimes i can't help myself but breakdown and cry. It crushes my soul remembering how much i used to enjoy living, How my imagination was not only unlimited but filled with wonderful ideas. I can't go one day without thinking about horrible things such as the many different ways my life can horribly end from a silent death to being a mass killer gunned down by the police for all the evil i have caused.
My OCD has gotten so much worse overtime too, I never used to care what my builds looked like or if they were perfectly even. I didn't spend agonizing over the small details of everything, I never cared about the username i went by online, I was just having fun in with endless possibilities in life with endless possibilities. Now I'm 24 my possibilities have run out even in the game my possibilities have run out because my mind is a prison that wants things done in a certain way.
It reminds me of a simpler time before I was shackled by the uglyness of the outside and in. Before a time my soul battered from the cruelity and apathy of society when my eyes where filled with a fierce burning light.
My OCD has gotten so much worse overtime too, I never used to care what my builds looked like or if they were perfectly even. I didn't spend agonizing over the small details of everything, I never cared about the username i went by online, I was just having fun in with endless possibilities in life with endless possibilities. Now I'm 24 my possibilities have run out even in the game my possibilities have run out because my mind is a prison that wants things done in a certain way.
It reminds me of a simpler time before I was shackled by the uglyness of the outside and in. Before a time my soul battered from the cruelity and apathy of society when my eyes where filled with a fierce burning light.
