If I knew from the beginning this would be the end result of my 2 decades spent in this lifetime, this world, this society even, I would've changed so many things about my life. Would've been a double edged sword though. Because for everything I now have the answer to, all those answers mean that my innocence and happy mind is disintegrated that much faster. I could try to change the outcome, but that would only prolong the whole thing. So it seems even if I did know my fate years earlier in some alternate timeline, the end result would still be the same. If anything it would probably end up being even worse than how it played out in this timelines version of events. Because in addition to knowing my fate years earlier, I have to watch my peers go through the same development all over again, only this time I know for absolute certain I won't experience it and I'm not hopeful like I was originally.
