My whole life I was always the small guy. And my whole life, i’ve always made my characters the tallest and the biggest possible in video games to cope. I larp my height online, I never once told someone my real height. My entire past school life is guys pushing me around physically and women making fun of my thin stature.
Then comes highschool, I’m still underweight by a good 10-20lbs, and now I have acne!. Grade 9 was spent being bullied by tall black chimps that sagged their pants. Highschool made me racist, more so made me realize that I SHOULD be racist.
Grade 10. My good ol boomer dad brings me my first weight, I start doing autistic arm day exercises with a single weight in my room watching YouTube tutorials. I got my first pump, I look in the mirror, and for the first time in my life I felt… happy with my body.
Fast forward 3 years and I’m 17, I spent 3 years lifting hard, oblivious to the black pill, finally happy with how my body looks. I had visible abs, and even got a couple compliments on my body online. I was still pretty thin and short, but at least my childhood dream of being the “big” guy has partially come true
2021, I discover the black pill. I learn facial ratios, i educate myself on phenotipic ideals and the objective truth of deformities that plagued my face. I always liked my face despite being an object 4/10, of course oblivious at the time, I never once payed attention to my face until 2021. Complete destruction of confidence and self image. I realize the many flaws are on my face, how “ugly” I truly was.
2022, I start joining and getting into incel communities on discord. Made some good memories, but a lot of horrible ones too of people seeming to find new flaws in my face I would’ve never thought possible.
2023, I completely stopped working out, and I begin to starve myself in order to get hollow cheeks. I am completely stone cold and bLaCk PiLlEd at this point, I know everything there is about the face.
2024, I lost ALL my muscle, I eat like shit due to the loss of hope and how much I realized my body didn’t matter, and all that’s left is my mediocre face and short stature
Then comes highschool, I’m still underweight by a good 10-20lbs, and now I have acne!. Grade 9 was spent being bullied by tall black chimps that sagged their pants. Highschool made me racist, more so made me realize that I SHOULD be racist.
Grade 10. My good ol boomer dad brings me my first weight, I start doing autistic arm day exercises with a single weight in my room watching YouTube tutorials. I got my first pump, I look in the mirror, and for the first time in my life I felt… happy with my body.
Fast forward 3 years and I’m 17, I spent 3 years lifting hard, oblivious to the black pill, finally happy with how my body looks. I had visible abs, and even got a couple compliments on my body online. I was still pretty thin and short, but at least my childhood dream of being the “big” guy has partially come true
2021, I discover the black pill. I learn facial ratios, i educate myself on phenotipic ideals and the objective truth of deformities that plagued my face. I always liked my face despite being an object 4/10, of course oblivious at the time, I never once payed attention to my face until 2021. Complete destruction of confidence and self image. I realize the many flaws are on my face, how “ugly” I truly was.
2022, I start joining and getting into incel communities on discord. Made some good memories, but a lot of horrible ones too of people seeming to find new flaws in my face I would’ve never thought possible.
2023, I completely stopped working out, and I begin to starve myself in order to get hollow cheeks. I am completely stone cold and bLaCk PiLlEd at this point, I know everything there is about the face.
2024, I lost ALL my muscle, I eat like shit due to the loss of hope and how much I realized my body didn’t matter, and all that’s left is my mediocre face and short stature
