Don't know what being a normie is like. I never fit in anywhere from the very start of my life till its end I will be an unwilling outcast in this world. Guess my brain wiring got fked as I was growing up and there is no fixing it now. Like, I went to school and I did what everyone else did but I never got invited to their little groups and circles, how comes? Then I got a job in a restaurant, I did everything everyone else did but I was never invited to the group chats, I was never part of anything. Then new people joined the work after me and they were in those clubs but how? I didn't see them do anything different than I did, then how do they do it? How do they get invited into those places?
When I tried approaching women 6 years ago it was just a disaster after disaster. So I stopped trying because what's the point I was just making myself feel like shit every time I got rejected, sometiems I didn't even get rejected I just got fucking cockroach treatment instead, with the looks on the face of those women, if only you could see it, they didn't even have to say anything. I never understood what that feels like truly until some gay faggot complemented me while I was standing in line in Mcdonalds to get my Mayo chicken, he said I got a nice coat and tried to start small talk with me, he looked gay at first It didn't click in my head but as he kept talking I had a surge of a most disgusting feeling in the world when interacting with him and wanted him gone ASAP.
That is when I understood what women feel when they interact with me. It was a one-in-a-lifetime experience that opened my eyes fully. It's not that I disliked this guy or whatever, Idgf about him he could be a cool guy even a friend, but that feeling... It was something else, like my DNA programming activating some protocol inside of my brain telling me to keep the fuck away from this faggot or he'll try to fuck me and that can't be because he's a disgusting beast.
Yeah anyway I sometiems watch a lot of random family blogs on youtube, very niche blogs with a couple thousand views at most. Random ones, I watch slavs, niggers, arabs, jews, all kinds of random family blogs I watch. They go out, do stuff, eat at restaurants, do small talk. It's so strange and sad to me this type of lives, It just makes me feel sad like I'm not human, like I don't know how to be a normie because I don't.
Being an outcast isn't cool, I don't even know what I'm doing I just waste my time, i have 0 idea what the fuck happened the last 9 years of my life I literally just rotted them away. And now I'm 29 and almost 30 years old virgin and it's just so over.
So yh I'm gonna try SEAmaxxing soon, quitting my job at the end of this year and got enough saved up to just fuck off to Philiphinnes for a year or so and chill there, at that point I might as well make vlogs or some gay ass shit for the memes and stuff idk, I kinda don't really wanna live anymore like this tbh, my life is utter garbage the only reason I wanna keep going is just to see what happens next in the world that's pretty much it.
I was thinking of just psychadelicmaxxing to the point where I just overwrite whatever the fuck I am now and roll the dice, but maybe that'll just fuck me up even more, who knows what it takes to keep us ticking. Anyway, that would be a cool cope but it still will not resolve the fact I am ugly as fuck so...
It's joeover
When I tried approaching women 6 years ago it was just a disaster after disaster. So I stopped trying because what's the point I was just making myself feel like shit every time I got rejected, sometiems I didn't even get rejected I just got fucking cockroach treatment instead, with the looks on the face of those women, if only you could see it, they didn't even have to say anything. I never understood what that feels like truly until some gay faggot complemented me while I was standing in line in Mcdonalds to get my Mayo chicken, he said I got a nice coat and tried to start small talk with me, he looked gay at first It didn't click in my head but as he kept talking I had a surge of a most disgusting feeling in the world when interacting with him and wanted him gone ASAP.
That is when I understood what women feel when they interact with me. It was a one-in-a-lifetime experience that opened my eyes fully. It's not that I disliked this guy or whatever, Idgf about him he could be a cool guy even a friend, but that feeling... It was something else, like my DNA programming activating some protocol inside of my brain telling me to keep the fuck away from this faggot or he'll try to fuck me and that can't be because he's a disgusting beast.
Yeah anyway I sometiems watch a lot of random family blogs on youtube, very niche blogs with a couple thousand views at most. Random ones, I watch slavs, niggers, arabs, jews, all kinds of random family blogs I watch. They go out, do stuff, eat at restaurants, do small talk. It's so strange and sad to me this type of lives, It just makes me feel sad like I'm not human, like I don't know how to be a normie because I don't.
Being an outcast isn't cool, I don't even know what I'm doing I just waste my time, i have 0 idea what the fuck happened the last 9 years of my life I literally just rotted them away. And now I'm 29 and almost 30 years old virgin and it's just so over.
So yh I'm gonna try SEAmaxxing soon, quitting my job at the end of this year and got enough saved up to just fuck off to Philiphinnes for a year or so and chill there, at that point I might as well make vlogs or some gay ass shit for the memes and stuff idk, I kinda don't really wanna live anymore like this tbh, my life is utter garbage the only reason I wanna keep going is just to see what happens next in the world that's pretty much it.
I was thinking of just psychadelicmaxxing to the point where I just overwrite whatever the fuck I am now and roll the dice, but maybe that'll just fuck me up even more, who knows what it takes to keep us ticking. Anyway, that would be a cool cope but it still will not resolve the fact I am ugly as fuck so...
It's joeover
