I was going to make a thread about how I used to be a mentalcel and a volcel when I was younger, but then I realized something

[Deleted member 7448]

I don't blame anyone or anything for my inceldom. My life is full of mistakes and self-sabotage, the fault lies on me and my undiagnosed donkey brain.

And based on that line of thinking, I came to the realization that I was a mentalcel and volcel when I was younger.

BUT, then I remembered what actually happened. Girls didn't like me. I was fat and weak as a kid, always was "exempt" from physical education (it's eastern europe, if you wanted to be exempt all you had to do is pay a small bribe to a doctor you know and you'd still have to go to PE but you'd basically do nothing). And then I even remember a girl comparing me to the ugly spanish asian guy from Dexter, and once I was compared to Dwight from the office too. At the time I didn't really believe I was ugly, just fat, but I guess I was ugly too. Then I lost the weight, even became anorexic. At the same time I started losing my hair, maybe it caused my hair loss, idk. I was skinny finally, but girls still didn't like me, not even what I believed was an uglier nerdy girl, didn't like me at all. Even the ugly girls in highschool didn't like me, weird. Still didn't think I was ugly.

And then there's now. I'm fat cause food is the only happiness in my life. I'm balding so hard I had to get a buzzcut. I'm wearing thick ass glasses cause I've spent my entire life in front of a screen. I'm definitely ugly now.

 

[Deleted member 8353]

I had a very similar experience when I was younger. I was fat and girls didn't like me, blamed it on my weight, became underweight, and they still didn't like me. It took me years of coping to finally accept that I was actually ugly, despite being told that I was near constantly as a kid, and despite not letting other people take pictures of me.

 

[Emba]

Sergeant Battista! Ola!
"La Passioñ!"

I too used to think it was from "bad decisions" but now I know I was just not Chad.

 

[Deleted member 7448]

Sergeant Battista! Ola!
"La Passioñ!"

I too used to think it was from "bad decisions" but now I know I was just not Chad.

Not that guy, the other guy.

My bad, it's the asian guy not the spanish guy. It's been a long time since I watched this, my memory is bad.

 

[Joelossus]

I can relate, i was also quit chubby as a kid, became anorexic aswell, (still suffer from it to a certain extend) but the girls still didn't liked me and continued to call me namens. Became a complete shut in because of it, and dropped out of school after finishing 9th grade. Coped by telling myself, that i need to loose even more weight, or that a different hair cut would might be the solution. But no nothing helped me to pass the looks threshold, which is necessary to pass if you want to be a part of this society. When i finally realized that all my attempts of escaping this hellhole were in vein, i just gave up and LDAR since.

 

[Emba]

Oh! Lol. Matsuka!

Not that guy, the other guy.

My bad, it's the asian guy not the spanish guy. It's been a long time since I watched this, my memory is bad.

I was normal weighted a few years ago. Then I twigged out. I quit eating bacon for a while thinking it would help my pain. It didn't. So I'm on the bacon again and put the face weight back on. But am still too skinny.