Deleted member 301
"The Pessimist Was Right All Along"
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- Joined
- Nov 8, 2017
- Posts
- 4,640
An explanation if you will, this is all an embarrassing, dumb mess tbh. I originally wasn't gonna bother but I don't wanna be that much of a coward.
TLDR: I double-dosed on Fentanyl two nights ago (deliberately, evidence in picture in post) to see what would happen, turns it I went a little bit insane lol Don't remember making a post on "looksmax.org "doxxing meself with an obvious fake(ish) photo (It's actually 2 photo's of me morphed, it looks like a hybrid version of me, and freaks me out looking at it tbh), it was a daft, bizarre and completely out of character thing for me to do, which doesn't make sense. Obviously doesn't make sense because I was off my face. Drugs are bad children, even more so when you've been sober for nine months, I'm only glad this mess was as bad as it got.
This is basically a copy of what I sent @knajjd
First off I'm not a larper, everything I've posted about my life and experiences is true. I am a 37 year old KHHV Truecel, I did spend ages 16-36 as an Alcoholiccel and was a Homelesscel for 5 and a half years from July 2014-December 2019 when I was hospitalised, then done rehab and now am in a Supported Living Facility. My whole life experiences I've posted on here are 100% true, and (not that you will or should btw) if you go through my post history you'll see it's consistent with what I say every time, because it's true.
This whole picture businesses has me really embarrassed and freaked out, as I rely on this community for friendship and my only source of connection with people of my own kind, and the thought of losing it altogether is terrifying. I felt I owed a explanation to the community.
Everything came about as a result of this thread:
https://incels.is/threads/doxx-pic-of-my-face.243941/#post-5528630
In it there is discussion of taking opiates, I've attached pictures of the post:
You'll see I answered that I am on Fentanyl patches to manage crippling Chronic Pancreatitis pain caused by 20 years of hard drinking, and that they send me on a trip every time I take them. If you know what Fentanyl does (I think George Floyd was on it lol ), it does fuck you right up if you mess with it, so me being me (an idiot) I put 2 patches on me (which is dangerous tbh) later on that night (or early next morning), and was basically out of it after a little while. Then I awoke to a load of "looksmax.org" notifications and seen a thread on there that I'd made with a hybrid version of me on there as a face reveal. I originally freaked out and wanted to make a new account here, as I couldn't face all the notifications and also the thought that I could even have been already banned. Cringe is something I hate, well, when it's me that has reason to cringe lol
It's a pretty clumsy looking pic too, with Faceapp. I can honestly say I don't remember registering on "looksmax.org" or posting the thread, but I don't deny I done it. Can confirm that is a Faceapp pic. It does actually look like me tbh (which freaks me out, just glad somewhere in my tripped out brain I still managed to not post a genuine pic of me) but it's morphed with a younger picture of me lol. I had to go through my phone to actually find all this out as don't remember doing it. I think the title of that thread I attached must also have planted a seed in my mind also, then something just triggered when I was tripping.
I would never have done this, (committed "Incel" Hari Kari) obviously, had I been thinking clearly and not off my face on George Floyd's favourite tipple lol Sorry, couldn't resist that. Even if I had meant to, I'd have done a hell of a better job. You've seen my mosaics, I'm quite apt with shit like that, it's not a speciality or anything, though I would have made better attempt.
Anyhow I have also attached a verified pic of my Fentanyl patches box as proof I take them and that I was on another planet when this whole mess happened:
I am sorry again for all this, I still can't bring myself to read the many notifications I have as I'm so embarrassed, also I'm a coward and the cringe factor would be too much as I know they'll probably be about this. Anyway, I feel like I've let everyone (especially myself) down with all this. The fact that I've given up alcohol only to replace it with abusing Fentanyl and other opiates already makes me realise that I have some issues in my private life (other than Inceldom) that I should probably take time to address. It may be that time away from here is needed to also address those issues I've mentioned in my private life, and to stop any of this out of character behaviour happening again. Or anything worse lol.
If you read all that, thank you.
I'm sure I'll come back one day, this place is too fun to stay away too long.
Peace out guy's
TLDR: I double-dosed on Fentanyl two nights ago (deliberately, evidence in picture in post) to see what would happen, turns it I went a little bit insane lol Don't remember making a post on "looksmax.org "doxxing meself with an obvious fake(ish) photo (It's actually 2 photo's of me morphed, it looks like a hybrid version of me, and freaks me out looking at it tbh), it was a daft, bizarre and completely out of character thing for me to do, which doesn't make sense. Obviously doesn't make sense because I was off my face. Drugs are bad children, even more so when you've been sober for nine months, I'm only glad this mess was as bad as it got.
This is basically a copy of what I sent @knajjd
First off I'm not a larper, everything I've posted about my life and experiences is true. I am a 37 year old KHHV Truecel, I did spend ages 16-36 as an Alcoholiccel and was a Homelesscel for 5 and a half years from July 2014-December 2019 when I was hospitalised, then done rehab and now am in a Supported Living Facility. My whole life experiences I've posted on here are 100% true, and (not that you will or should btw) if you go through my post history you'll see it's consistent with what I say every time, because it's true.
This whole picture businesses has me really embarrassed and freaked out, as I rely on this community for friendship and my only source of connection with people of my own kind, and the thought of losing it altogether is terrifying. I felt I owed a explanation to the community.
Everything came about as a result of this thread:
https://incels.is/threads/doxx-pic-of-my-face.243941/#post-5528630
In it there is discussion of taking opiates, I've attached pictures of the post:
You'll see I answered that I am on Fentanyl patches to manage crippling Chronic Pancreatitis pain caused by 20 years of hard drinking, and that they send me on a trip every time I take them. If you know what Fentanyl does (I think George Floyd was on it lol ), it does fuck you right up if you mess with it, so me being me (an idiot) I put 2 patches on me (which is dangerous tbh) later on that night (or early next morning), and was basically out of it after a little while. Then I awoke to a load of "looksmax.org" notifications and seen a thread on there that I'd made with a hybrid version of me on there as a face reveal. I originally freaked out and wanted to make a new account here, as I couldn't face all the notifications and also the thought that I could even have been already banned. Cringe is something I hate, well, when it's me that has reason to cringe lol
It's a pretty clumsy looking pic too, with Faceapp. I can honestly say I don't remember registering on "looksmax.org" or posting the thread, but I don't deny I done it. Can confirm that is a Faceapp pic. It does actually look like me tbh (which freaks me out, just glad somewhere in my tripped out brain I still managed to not post a genuine pic of me) but it's morphed with a younger picture of me lol. I had to go through my phone to actually find all this out as don't remember doing it. I think the title of that thread I attached must also have planted a seed in my mind also, then something just triggered when I was tripping.
I would never have done this, (committed "Incel" Hari Kari) obviously, had I been thinking clearly and not off my face on George Floyd's favourite tipple lol Sorry, couldn't resist that. Even if I had meant to, I'd have done a hell of a better job. You've seen my mosaics, I'm quite apt with shit like that, it's not a speciality or anything, though I would have made better attempt.
Anyhow I have also attached a verified pic of my Fentanyl patches box as proof I take them and that I was on another planet when this whole mess happened:
I am sorry again for all this, I still can't bring myself to read the many notifications I have as I'm so embarrassed, also I'm a coward and the cringe factor would be too much as I know they'll probably be about this. Anyway, I feel like I've let everyone (especially myself) down with all this. The fact that I've given up alcohol only to replace it with abusing Fentanyl and other opiates already makes me realise that I have some issues in my private life (other than Inceldom) that I should probably take time to address. It may be that time away from here is needed to also address those issues I've mentioned in my private life, and to stop any of this out of character behaviour happening again. Or anything worse lol.
If you read all that, thank you.
I'm sure I'll come back one day, this place is too fun to stay away too long.
Peace out guy's