I am saying that "oh women don't want me because I am an ethnic" or "women don't want me because I am ugly". I might be no better. I might not want to date a 4/10 lady. Sometimes I feel that the opinions I make about women are my projections.
If there is one thing you haven't done, it's think about this too much.
To start off, your 4/10 isn't equal to her 4/10. Hers includes a majority of all men.
Secondly,
I might not want to date a 4/10 lady.
I would bet money against that even being true, without even knowing anything about you. A slightly worse than average looking girl slips you her number. She seemed nice in her interaction with you, maybe a bit shy or nervous, but you got the feeling she was throwing herself at you. Do you call her?
If you were a woman and the situation was reversed, you wouldn't call. You would be hoping that you never meet that little creep again, so that you're spared the hassle of finding a polite way to turn down his advances.
People on here vent their emotions and talk shit about women all day, but I would be very, very suprised if not nearly all users would jump at the chance of ascending with an
'okish but not great' looking girl. Have you even tried to visualize what 4/10 looks like in a girl?
Obviously, if someone on here is not ascending because he refuses to date anything below 5/10 despite having the chance, that person is not an incel. Which brings me to another point. The fact that you don't know if you would means you didn't have the chance, which is yet another difference between you and the women you compare yourself to.
Lastly, the work you would need to invest into getting a 4/10 girl is vastly greater than what a woman in your position would need to invest to get a 4/10 man (~zero). So, even everything else being equal, which it obviously isn't, your behavior still couldn't be directly compared.
And what female nature looks like is independent of why you ended up recognizing it. Something doesn't stop being true because you became aware of it as part of a coping mechanism, like an attempt to hide something about yourself from yourself. You thinking that your opinions are nothing but projection is easily testable. Do you have data to undermine your claims? If yes, than even if you found that data while pursuing questionable goals, your perspective is still guranteed to be more than just projection.
In the worst case it would be something like "misinterpreting dating statistics" or "failing to check if data you want to believe is actually real or just made up". But that would still be something other than pure projection.
See how much more effort it is to engage with your one stupid line compared to how much thought and effort you invested into it before posting?