L
LuciferTakeMySoul
Greycel
★
- Joined
- Mar 17, 2018
- Posts
- 71
When I see something IRL that puts me off, I say to myself how I'm going to take care of them for what they've done. When I go out, all I feel is how much people are disgusted by me. If I am not invisible to my surroundings, then the only attention I receive is disgust for my existence.
I fully intend to pursue my phd, now that I've begun my junior year. I hope to use my education to contribute to the demise of our society, and hopefully our species. I was told that a CS PhD (where I will study AI) will consume my life, though I am fully prepared to give up my life if it means that nobody else will have to suffer like I have. I do not care about accolades, I do not care about money. Even if I maximized my earnings and bought love, I've seen the world for what it truly is, and frankly I don't wish to love or be loved by anyone anymore. I did not come to this world to love, I came into this world to be hated and to reciprocate that hatred. This is my fate, that I also share with some of you.
While it may seem to myself that I've become engulfed with darkness, I also take it that I've seen light that few others have, and I hope that such light guides me to implementing a state in the world where all of this suffering ends.
All I want, is to contribute to a new world where someone like myself doesn't have to suffer in the same way I have and continue to in my life. It is just too cruel.
I don't have the best genetics, and I grew up poor, but I'll do my best to overcome any and all obstacles with sheer will. While I cannot guarantee success, I hope to make a meaningful contribution.
I will do my best so that future generations won't have to suffer as we have had to (or more precisely, so that there aren't anymore future generations).
I fully intend to pursue my phd, now that I've begun my junior year. I hope to use my education to contribute to the demise of our society, and hopefully our species. I was told that a CS PhD (where I will study AI) will consume my life, though I am fully prepared to give up my life if it means that nobody else will have to suffer like I have. I do not care about accolades, I do not care about money. Even if I maximized my earnings and bought love, I've seen the world for what it truly is, and frankly I don't wish to love or be loved by anyone anymore. I did not come to this world to love, I came into this world to be hated and to reciprocate that hatred. This is my fate, that I also share with some of you.
While it may seem to myself that I've become engulfed with darkness, I also take it that I've seen light that few others have, and I hope that such light guides me to implementing a state in the world where all of this suffering ends.
All I want, is to contribute to a new world where someone like myself doesn't have to suffer in the same way I have and continue to in my life. It is just too cruel.
I don't have the best genetics, and I grew up poor, but I'll do my best to overcome any and all obstacles with sheer will. While I cannot guarantee success, I hope to make a meaningful contribution.
I will do my best so that future generations won't have to suffer as we have had to (or more precisely, so that there aren't anymore future generations).