Good. Don't ever try roping again. Be grateful that you didn't get any permanent damage from your attempts so far and use these chances life gave you to make your mental health and life at least bearable.
Seriously, failed suicide attempts usually gets very dark, imagine living the rest of your life in pain and unable to move.
Besides, if religions are a metaphorical way to describe reality, then successfully roping yourself would fuck you even worse, as hell is much worse than life since you can't really die there and will have to endure your suicide's pain for who knows how long), meaning it's not worth the risk even for us agnostics/atheists.