SuicideFuel Fear of aging and youth fading away; fear of maturing

[Alacros_vrail]

I have brain damage on my prefrontal cortex so I have no ability to regulate my emotions. My life is Hell. Because of this, I never really enjoyed my youth at all. I was always extremely nervous, friendless, unhappy, etc. Meanwhile, my two younger siblings and cousins always had their group of friends, traveled to places, enjoyed events together, etc.

I’m in my 20s and still want to do something before it’s too late as I can’t handle loneliness anymore. It’s scary.

I feel like I don’t want to mature anymore. Why? So that I can just experience a repeat of the unhappiness and psychological distress of my youth, but on a more depressing level?

When I was a teen, my siblings and cousins were very cheery, happy, outgoing, enjoying life, while I was very unhappy, depressed, friendless, etc. Now I feel that in maybe a few years from now it’ll be the opposite. I just don’t want to mature anymore. I hate life.

 

[aryanmikmaq]

I am still young luckily but I feel like shit

 

[Runt171]

I feel the same
I think I might have brain damage too but If I do its only mild

Ever since I got jumped a few years ago It feels like I haven’t been able to function as well and I definitely had a concussion that I never got checked out

While everyone else thrives we only sink deeper and deeper

 

[Rotten Roadkill]

Even if I get old I'd still look like shit so not much will change in my life. Honestly look forward to getting old since I'll be closer to death.

 

[Rotten Roadkill]

I am still young luckily but I feel like shit

 

[SnakeCel]

I have brain damage on my prefrontal cortex so I have no ability to regulate my emotions. My life is Hell. Because of this, I never really enjoyed my youth at all. I was always extremely nervous, friendless, unhappy, etc. Meanwhile, my two younger siblings and cousins always had their group of friends, traveled to places, enjoyed events together, etc.

I’m in my 20s and still want to do something before it’s too late as I can’t handle loneliness anymore. It’s scary.

I feel like I don’t want to mature anymore. Why? So that I can just experience a repeat of the unhappiness and psychological distress of my youth, but on a more depressing level?

When I was a teen, my siblings and cousins were very cheery, happy, outgoing, enjoying life, while I was very unhappy, depressed, friendless, etc. Now I feel that in maybe a few years from now it’ll be the opposite. I just don’t want to mature anymore. I hate life.

Every day more and more time slips away from us and we pass by more opportunities and events in life. Absolutely brutal.

It gets even worse when you think about how in many countries the average life expectancy is in the 70s, so when you are in your 30s, you are already middle aged and probably halfway done with your entire life, and that is if you are even lucky enough to live into your 70s at all.