I stare at myself in the mirror like it's something I can fix if I just analyze it long enough, tilting my head, changing the lighting and pulling my hair back, convincing it's just the acne , just the haircut, just one more adjustment away from finally being enough. Treating my face like an math problem , like if I calculate the angles and percentages correctly the answer will magically change but it never does . The number doesn't add up the way I want them to.
No matter how much I put effort into improving it stills feels like I'm building on an crooked base that was set long before I had any say in it. It's like I started a game where the stats where already assigned. And i keep grinding anyway, knowing deep down that I'm trying to compete in a world that rewards different blueprint.
No matter how much I put effort into improving it stills feels like I'm building on an crooked base that was set long before I had any say in it. It's like I started a game where the stats where already assigned. And i keep grinding anyway, knowing deep down that I'm trying to compete in a world that rewards different blueprint.
