Exactly.
I was bluepilled at these days, but my beautiful mind even at that time had some blackpilled hints like "Look at that guy. He has everything. Tall, muscular, slayer face, thug with alpha personality. What i'm compared to him? Filthy, skinny 5'6 autist? Why women would ever like me compared to him? What i have to offer, that he doesn't have?"
I believed not all girls are like that, not all girls like tall tatooed thugs, there is some girl for me, 5'6 autist, and all that bluepilled crap. As i aged, blackpill realisation of the world explained everything to me. I had no chance, and nothing was my fault. Pretty simple.