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Decided to dump my thoughts onto paper today, or rather into the digital void. Morning kicked off with the usual: another awakening and the realization that it's all still a fail. A glance in the mirror confirmed – my face isn't one of those liked on Insta. Breakfast was standard – toast with tea, symbolizing my inner world: pale and bland. Then the usual routine started – uni on Zoom. I feel like a ghost there. Maybe it's for the better being invisible, because why attract attention when you're 100% cringe? I look at those who interact and think they must be from another universe, where everyone has Insta-faces and charisma not at zero. Trying to speak up – I hit a wall of silence or cold monosyllables. In the world of normies, I'm like a level 1 squire, and they're all at least epic knights. Why is it so hard to just talk without the cringe? Spend the evening gaming. There, at least someone's happy to see me, even if it's just pixels on the screen. But as soon as the screen goes dark, I'm back to being alone with my gloomy thoughts. Before bed, I check social media, and it's like a kick in the gut. Everyone's so happy, and I'm like a bug in the system. On the forum, I decide to spill my thoughts, maybe I'll find some resonance here. Why am I such a background character? All these thoughts spin in my head like an endless loading buffer. Thanks to those who read this. For you – just another post, but for me – an attempt to find at least some echo of understanding.
