Saigon Depression
insane
★★★★★
- Joined
- Nov 17, 2017
- Posts
- 9,577
Just got back from an escort.
She was nice, always smiling, she kissed me without complaining, did most of the things I was asking for.
And I still feel like shit.
I already made a thread about my first ever visit in October
Back then, I was surprised how empty most of the sexual acts felt.
They felt good physically, but not as awesome as I always expected them to be.
These things happen again and again with each visit.
Blowjobs feel okay, but I can hardly cum. It took me 45 minutes to cum just once.
I can hardly penetrate her in any position, because I cannot even find the right angle or something like this.
When I finally can, my dick goes soft, or if it doesn't, I don't enjoy the actual fucking. Neither physically, nor emotionally. Neither does she of course, but at least she's pretending.
The whole thing just feels so unnatural.
The only thing that I can say I enjoy is kissing and boob sucking.
That's ridiculous.
I cannot even fuck properly.
And when I think about how 15 year old chads, chadlites or normies fuck females without experiencing any of these hardships, I feel extremely inferior and worthless.
I always believed (and heard from others) that fucking an escort would be very advantegous, because it relieves you of the emotional stress of virginity, and it gives you the confidence to talk to women and all that shit. It didn't help in that regard either. In terms of communication and social skills, I'm just as bad as I used to be.
I'm not regretting that I started escortcelling, but the truth is that I was somewhat happier when I was still a complete virgin and could fantasize about fucking without realizing that in reality, I cannot properly fuck a female.
Because fucking takes skills (physical and mental), and I don't even have those skills.
I will probably be tempted to escortcel soon again, but I already know that my next experience will be far from successful again.
I know that this thread is a little bit incoherent, but this is how I could gather my thoughts.
She was nice, always smiling, she kissed me without complaining, did most of the things I was asking for.
And I still feel like shit.
I already made a thread about my first ever visit in October
I visited an escort - now feeling empty inside
After almost two months of nofap (by far the longest of my life), I finally took the courage to visit an escort. 29, short, slightly chubby girl, fine tits. I paid for one hour, but the whole thing lasted for 30 minutes. Still, I didn't mind. Not that it was bad, because it's not true. But it...
incels.is
They felt good physically, but not as awesome as I always expected them to be.
These things happen again and again with each visit.
Blowjobs feel okay, but I can hardly cum. It took me 45 minutes to cum just once.
I can hardly penetrate her in any position, because I cannot even find the right angle or something like this.
When I finally can, my dick goes soft, or if it doesn't, I don't enjoy the actual fucking. Neither physically, nor emotionally. Neither does she of course, but at least she's pretending.
The whole thing just feels so unnatural.
The only thing that I can say I enjoy is kissing and boob sucking.
That's ridiculous.
I cannot even fuck properly.
And when I think about how 15 year old chads, chadlites or normies fuck females without experiencing any of these hardships, I feel extremely inferior and worthless.
I always believed (and heard from others) that fucking an escort would be very advantegous, because it relieves you of the emotional stress of virginity, and it gives you the confidence to talk to women and all that shit. It didn't help in that regard either. In terms of communication and social skills, I'm just as bad as I used to be.
I'm not regretting that I started escortcelling, but the truth is that I was somewhat happier when I was still a complete virgin and could fantasize about fucking without realizing that in reality, I cannot properly fuck a female.
Because fucking takes skills (physical and mental), and I don't even have those skills.
I will probably be tempted to escortcel soon again, but I already know that my next experience will be far from successful again.
I know that this thread is a little bit incoherent, but this is how I could gather my thoughts.