S
FUCK.
It's like everything that that happens in my life is just a brutal reminder of what I don't have and what I can never have. I listen to music and it constantly has themes of love and romance. I watch a movie and an aggressive SEX scene will pop out from nowhere. I'll be walking through the grocery store and see a couple holding hands. I'll be trying to study at Uni while some foids or frat-bro-fuckheads sitting 10 feet away from me brag about their body counts.
And then I hear news about how 2 of my former coworkers proposed to their girlfriends WITHIN THE SAME WEEK. I cannot bear to hear this news. This is simply unacceptable! For me, one of the biggest blackpills has been working at a place for over a year and then getting mogged by some newcomer that's been there for just 2 months (talking with all the foids and sharing laughs with them, etc.). And now they're going to go on to presumably procreate while my bloodline ends with me. I simply cannot accept this psychologically.
It's not just about sex. The feelings of dominance and power need to be expressed. they cannot be repressed (I didn't mean for all of that to rhyme, lol). They are natural, biological instincts. When denied, they may take on alternative forms to realise themselves, such as undermining some social norms like committing theft or uttering insults toward groups believed to be depriving them of power. Conquering a foid is the greatest way to express this feeling and when this cannot be done then feelings of anger and even hatred are simply inevitable consequences. One feels emasculated and cucked.
This of course isn't to say that such sentiments are necessarily rational or justified, but they do exist nonetheless. And I'm forced to wrestle with these feelings for which I have no outlet to express apart from pornography or my own fantasies (which of course isn't enough).
I remember once I was watching a podcast with Jordan B. Peterson interviewing Dr. David Buss and Buss said something like (paraphrasing): "It's a rather unfortunate fact that natural selection would endow creatures with desires that they'd never be able to fulfil.
It's like everything that that happens in my life is just a brutal reminder of what I don't have and what I can never have. I listen to music and it constantly has themes of love and romance. I watch a movie and an aggressive SEX scene will pop out from nowhere. I'll be walking through the grocery store and see a couple holding hands. I'll be trying to study at Uni while some foids or frat-bro-fuckheads sitting 10 feet away from me brag about their body counts.
And then I hear news about how 2 of my former coworkers proposed to their girlfriends WITHIN THE SAME WEEK. I cannot bear to hear this news. This is simply unacceptable! For me, one of the biggest blackpills has been working at a place for over a year and then getting mogged by some newcomer that's been there for just 2 months (talking with all the foids and sharing laughs with them, etc.). And now they're going to go on to presumably procreate while my bloodline ends with me. I simply cannot accept this psychologically.
It's not just about sex. The feelings of dominance and power need to be expressed. they cannot be repressed (I didn't mean for all of that to rhyme, lol). They are natural, biological instincts. When denied, they may take on alternative forms to realise themselves, such as undermining some social norms like committing theft or uttering insults toward groups believed to be depriving them of power. Conquering a foid is the greatest way to express this feeling and when this cannot be done then feelings of anger and even hatred are simply inevitable consequences. One feels emasculated and cucked.
This of course isn't to say that such sentiments are necessarily rational or justified, but they do exist nonetheless. And I'm forced to wrestle with these feelings for which I have no outlet to express apart from pornography or my own fantasies (which of course isn't enough).
I remember once I was watching a podcast with Jordan B. Peterson interviewing Dr. David Buss and Buss said something like (paraphrasing): "It's a rather unfortunate fact that natural selection would endow creatures with desires that they'd never be able to fulfil.
