![CircumcisedClown](/data/avatars/m/45/45210.jpg?1660534638)
CircumcisedClown
Major
★★★★★
- Joined
- Aug 14, 2022
- Posts
- 2,400
![Joaquin Phoenix Napoleon GIF by Sony Pictures Joaquin Phoenix Napoleon GIF by Sony Pictures](https://media0.giphy.com/media/E4aCIECklTy9OsHuOS/200.gif)
I like Joaquin Pheonix, but he’s not a good cast for Napoleon. Firstly, Napoleon was a young leader. He wasn’t anywhere close to Joaquin’s age until he was exiled. Napoleon’s rise to fame started in his 20s, and he was ruling France by 30.
Also, yes, Napoleon wasn’t actually short for his time/region, but I would have preferred a true 5’5” actor. Pheonix isn’t tall (5’8”), but Hollywood hates making gigamanlets the hero of stories. It seems like a big letdown for a historical figure that’s so well known for his height (even if he wasn’t technically short).
![Wolverine GIF Wolverine GIF](https://media3.giphy.com/media/yEStAKFg8EA3S/200.gif)
Like Hugh Jackman (6’2”) getting cast as Wolverine despite Wolverine being canonically like 5’3”, because you can’t let a short guy be the hero.
![David Pamela Chougne GIF David Pamela Chougne GIF](https://media3.giphy.com/media/3o7btZJtkmIwo16U12/200.gif)
Centuries of your name being synonymous with size compensation and a height complex, and they cast an old, normie-height dude to play you.
![11495852-600x450.jpg](/proxy.php?image=https%3A%2F%2Fbizzarrobazar.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2019%2F05%2F11495852-600x450.jpg&hash=938559908280c37a017d6461eb6b64f9)
Reminder that Napoleon’s penis was sealed and placed in a museum so that women could laugh at how small it was even centuries after his death. Also remember that his lover secretly admitted that she was disgusted by him in her diary which was discovered after her death.
![Season 7 Episode 24 GIF by SpongeBob SquarePants Season 7 Episode 24 GIF by SpongeBob SquarePants](https://media4.giphy.com/media/3o6wNS5BG14qRbHtm0/200.gif)
History is unkind to manlets.