Yeah it's one of those things that is still hard to accept after you learn how cruel, cold and calculating women can be. It just doesn't add up at first but it makes perfect sense when you look at it cynically and are willing to entertain the worst notions about women if needed.
Not to err too heavily on differences between the genders (which is kind of exaggerated ngl because normie men and women really act pretty similarly when it comes to following trends) but imo part of this can be explained women are known for being more indirect, more suggestible and being quicker to use violence by proxy than men. Also overall women are physically weaker than men so they can't accomplish as much of their aims through overt violence. This makes passive aggressiveness a much better option for women than men.
Passive aggressiveness in men also is not tolerated as much because it's seen as weak and passive behavior. Socially acceptable for women to engage in but not men.
