i never had anything ,
just myself , and some basic necessities , nothing else ..
and even that i am losing rn
never a single friend ,
never even held hands or hugged a girl ,
all my life i was beaten , bullied , laughed at , rejected ...
People disgusted by me ,
coworkers , superiors , classmates making fun of me ,
people talking behind my back , never a good word ..
and i took it , i just ate it up , hid the pain deep inside like a good little slave ,
turned the other cheek like a beta fag ..
My Life like a tragic comedy and i am a statistic , just watching it all pass by from far away ,
lost in my own little world of daydreams of copes ,
distractions , immersion and instant gratification .
Complacent with this low tier , shitty parasitic existence , comfortably numb , too stupid and too lazy to change ,
and i cant blame that on my looks , i can only balem that on my own , my fault that i fucked it up so bad .
But now , there is nothing left , i am getting older ,
and i am realizing that my life is over beyond any hope ,
not a single shimmer of hope , nothing to achieve ...
Thats why i named myself after this guy from fight club ,
my life is literally the same ...
Hidden away from the world in some shitty appartment , just biding my time , consuming useless shit ,
a statistic in Life and deep inside i feel nothing caus i have wasted it all ..
pretending to be a normal person but in the end i am a zombie , just going through the motions without a reason ..
Just self deprecation , thinking i am special when i play this role of some sad little tragic clown ,
meanwhile i am literal human garbage , with zero redeeming qualties ...
i need to find my rage , i need to find my anger again , my Testosterone and my aggression destroyed by depression a long time ago ..
swallowed by nihilism and all thats left is an empthy shell of a human , TOXIC HUMAN WASTE H AHAHAHIHbhykdjhkjdyhkdsjhds
anyway its time to completely lose it , ive had enough of this shitty life ,
enough of this uselkkess shame and regret , this useless fear , this self deprecation , this tragic persona , this beta behaviour ,
i am tired of what i have allowed myself to become
everything is gone now , all that i can do now is dance on my grave
just myself , and some basic necessities , nothing else ..
and even that i am losing rn
never a single friend ,
never even held hands or hugged a girl ,
all my life i was beaten , bullied , laughed at , rejected ...
People disgusted by me ,
coworkers , superiors , classmates making fun of me ,
people talking behind my back , never a good word ..
and i took it , i just ate it up , hid the pain deep inside like a good little slave ,
turned the other cheek like a beta fag ..
My Life like a tragic comedy and i am a statistic , just watching it all pass by from far away ,
lost in my own little world of daydreams of copes ,
distractions , immersion and instant gratification .
Complacent with this low tier , shitty parasitic existence , comfortably numb , too stupid and too lazy to change ,
and i cant blame that on my looks , i can only balem that on my own , my fault that i fucked it up so bad .
But now , there is nothing left , i am getting older ,
and i am realizing that my life is over beyond any hope ,
not a single shimmer of hope , nothing to achieve ...
Thats why i named myself after this guy from fight club ,
my life is literally the same ...
Hidden away from the world in some shitty appartment , just biding my time , consuming useless shit ,
a statistic in Life and deep inside i feel nothing caus i have wasted it all ..
pretending to be a normal person but in the end i am a zombie , just going through the motions without a reason ..
Just self deprecation , thinking i am special when i play this role of some sad little tragic clown ,
meanwhile i am literal human garbage , with zero redeeming qualties ...
i need to find my rage , i need to find my anger again , my Testosterone and my aggression destroyed by depression a long time ago ..
swallowed by nihilism and all thats left is an empthy shell of a human , TOXIC HUMAN WASTE H AHAHAHIHbhykdjhkjdyhkdsjhds
anyway its time to completely lose it , ive had enough of this shitty life ,
enough of this uselkkess shame and regret , this useless fear , this self deprecation , this tragic persona , this beta behaviour ,
i am tired of what i have allowed myself to become
everything is gone now , all that i can do now is dance on my grave
