I feel myself getting older
getting more accustomed to this Life
shaking the hands of fate
timidly rotting away
i remember the times as a kid
when i was happy
extroverted , with a smile on my face
when i used to tell my parents about my crazy living
before they divorced
before they threw bottles and plates at each other
before i started hiding from the world
and just cried into my pillow until my tears dried up
before my smile twisted into a frown ,
an expression of confusion .
How could this happen ?
How could this world forsake me ?
Thats what my childish mind thought .
Here i am now
broken
ugly
indoctrinated
socially isolated
SO FUCKING AFRAID OF EVERYTHING
Nothing to lose , nothing to gain
But still feeling like this isnt the End
Where is my breaking point ?
Where is rock bottom ?
How deep down does this hole go ?
I guess ill find out .
Do i just stay comfortably numb til i cant take it anymore ?
i have no control over my actions anymore ,
i just let myself fall into this pit of despair
as if it was a cushion ,
as if it would catch me before i hit the ground .
But it embraced me , it swallowed me .
And now im enslaved by my Demons .
Stuck in a cage .
Running in circles , behind bars .
Im done .
getting more accustomed to this Life
shaking the hands of fate
timidly rotting away
i remember the times as a kid
when i was happy
extroverted , with a smile on my face
when i used to tell my parents about my crazy living
before they divorced
before they threw bottles and plates at each other
before i started hiding from the world
and just cried into my pillow until my tears dried up
before my smile twisted into a frown ,
an expression of confusion .
How could this happen ?
How could this world forsake me ?
Thats what my childish mind thought .
Here i am now
broken
ugly
indoctrinated
socially isolated
SO FUCKING AFRAID OF EVERYTHING
Nothing to lose , nothing to gain
But still feeling like this isnt the End
Where is my breaking point ?
Where is rock bottom ?
How deep down does this hole go ?
I guess ill find out .
Do i just stay comfortably numb til i cant take it anymore ?
i have no control over my actions anymore ,
i just let myself fall into this pit of despair
as if it was a cushion ,
as if it would catch me before i hit the ground .
But it embraced me , it swallowed me .
And now im enslaved by my Demons .
Stuck in a cage .
Running in circles , behind bars .
Im done .
