What’s life like as a male with autism ?

[imblessed1]

Like how do people treat you in general ?

 

[SoloAlex]

Autism.is

 

[Izayacel]

people ignore me most of the time .

got no " fRiEnDs , well the one true firend i had , fucmign went off after taking therapy .

( he was heightmogging everyone and was white , but just normie tier looks )

well anyways, got some plans that need to be done . other then that its just coping

 

[Saint Cho]

no friends, no fuck-buddies.

 

[Zhou Chang-Xing]

Shit in general, I think it's because I'm Autistic + ugly. If I were just Autistic I might had some respect from others but everyone treats me like absolute shit, like I'm some fucking child.

Here's a golden tip for fellow Aspiecels, never tell ANYONE about your Autism. I haven't told anyone since I was 18 (unless they were people that specifically are helping me through government grants) and people treat you like an equal until you fuck up socially. One friend of mine has severe schizophrenia and all of her boyfriends have some form of Autism and I didn't even tell her.

Tell nobody, ever.

Another of my friends describes me as "odd, but more empathic than her other friends" mostly because I've learned to mimic neuroatypical behaviours. Keep emulating NT behaviours and you get friends... But people still hate you for being an ugly old fuck.

Another friend basically said that she saw me as "a wallflower" because whenever we go out I don't tend to interact with people, getting over shyness as an Autist is really difficult.

I have yet to be able to approach a toilet I find interesting to ask her out, well, I did in NYC and got brutally rejected by a noodlewhore.

Living life as an Autistic male is like living in literal hell.

 

[Zhou Chang-Xing]

It's mostly bullying and people ignoring you, at least from my experience in my school years.

Same here, though I managed to get popular (in a nearly all-boys school) because I managed to get the social skills to interact with... Fellow mentally ill people. Never learned how to talk with mentally sane people. In the Dutch education system they just dump all non-NT kids in the same schools and isolate us from society until we can all become NEETcels. It's literally Nazism with very slow sterilisation.

I will take this shit country down.

 

[NorthernWind]

Same here, though I managed to get popular (in a nearly all-boys school) because I managed to get the social skills to interact with... Fellow mentally ill people. Never learned how to talk with mentally sane people. In the Dutch education system they just dump all non-NT kids in the same schools and isolate us from society until we can all become NEETcels. It's literally Nazism with very slow sterilisation.

I will take this shit country down.

'B-but autism is a superpower'
Why you need to isolate autists then, hypocritical normgroids?

 

[Sexless incel]

I don’t have autism but i got criticized as a child merciless for every behavior that wasn’t considered normal, so I can only imagine how hard it is to be weird all the time

 

[Hell]

Hopefully you're one of the obnoxious ones that never shut up about My Little Pony or Sonic and are completely socially oblivious because these guys are usually pretty happy and befriend other spergs and sometimes even get a fat gf if they're the AMOG sperg or are quite tall.

Otherwise you're the brooding loner that is avoided and feared.

 

[Sheogorath]

Like how do people treat you in general ?

I honestly think people treat you the same but you're more aware of how shitty they treat you so you hate them more.

But maybe you actually realizing the shittiness and reacting to it instead of rolling over like a cuck makes them despise you even more.

 

[nystagmuscel]

NT’s virtue signal and use you for woke points but meanwhile do everything in their power to shun you

 

[turbosperg]

I feel like an alien visiting Earth.
I don't understand people.
People don't understand me.

I have an odd behavior, odd disposition, when I talk my talk is odd, when I walk people see I'm weird from 100 yards away.

My smile is weird. My frown is weird.

I'm serous, people think I'm joking.
I'm having a fun time people say I look serious.

I have some nerdy Friends, but they live far away. I live alone and know nobody for hundreds of miles.

I hear people making fun of me behind my back. Men spit on the floor as I walk, girls point at me and giggle. Unprovoked. This is just due to the way I look and the general "weirdness" of my demeanor.

I'm constantly afraid of getting into fights due to common misunderstandings. I'm terrified people will start rumors about me to try and get me lynched on the streets just because they dislike the way I walk, my facial expressions, and the way I look around.

I work from home (telecommuting), but my colleagues don't like me. I was never promoted, always passed over - often for foids.

Local businesses where I shop scam me routinely, and then abuse me as I complain, and laugh behind my back as I walk away.

My family disrespects me.

I'm always civil and couteous to all these people, and they always shit on me.

I live in constant isolation and dread.

 

[Cybersex is our hope]

Like how do people treat you in general ?

Foids ignore and sexually discriminate me every day. This is pure violence.

 

[Indari]

Dutch

mogger

 

[iceandblood]

It's like being a monkey in a jungle full of monkeys and feeling very lonely and annoyed because of it

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

.

Story One:

I've suffered from Major Depressive Disorder(MDD) and Generalized Anxiety Disorder(GAD) since I was nine or ten. This led to me entering a group therapy program when I was fourteen, where I met a young girl named Shannon.

Shannon was anxious and had social anxiety/depression. However, Shannon was treated fairly well in the program. I, however, I was denigrated by both psychologists and youth. A certain "redhead" psychologist would frequently criticize me because I struggled to make eye contact or speak to other youth. I had to use stress balls to control my anxiety, which made me a source of amusement for the other youth in the group. They whispered and laughed at me, but treated Shannon like a queen.

To shorten the story, I'll say this: We were placed into separate therapy groups due to "unintended problems"(Negatively "influencing" a female of higher status). Years later, she did some "lovely things" to me after volunteering in the psychiatric hospital.

That situation has always bothered me. Anyway, moving on...

Story: Two:

I lived in a youth commune for some time. There, I was harassed/bullied by Tyrone and Chadlito. Tyrone took pictures of my naked body(I was in the male bathroom cleaning myself) and started laughing at my child-like appearance and fairly small phallus size with his roommate. He also threw dice at my room door each night and would play loud "rap" music at maximum volume to disturb me.

Chadlito, however, was much more subtle. He would peak into my room and, on occasion, steal my items. He also liked to gossip about me("He's a weirdo", "He's a freak", "He puts food in bags and goes outside to eat alone") and especially loved recording me. This led to him recording me while I was sleeping(I have sexsomnia), which led to the shelter boys/girls laughing at my "sexual speech". Note that the shelter girls had already mocked me previously for my feminine voice and autistic, avoidant behavior.

Because my case manager divulged my ASD diagnosis freely, I was a prime target for bullying and abuse from other youth. Chadlito eventually tried to have me evicted from the commune, which happened after I started staying in my commune room most of the time to avoid being shoved into desks by him(Demonstrating his "machismo" against an innocent aspie).

It is painful to have ASD, MDD, GAD, PTSD(It was already present from childhood trauma), and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria/RSD. I would've likely roped if not for my obsessive fantasizing from ASD.

Perhaps. At that age, I started being bullied for my autistic traits and difficulty socializing. I was anxious and would fidget with objects.

In comparison, a woman I know, with similar illnesses, developed lifelong friendships and now has a rich social life.

I've experienced this "firsthand"; a psychiatric nurse said "Hello Su" to me because I was fidgeting with a pencil in my hospital room. This is despite the fact that ASD-related fidgeting was already documented in my mental health history. I am a short ethnic male.

Yes, I used to have more "closeness" with my maternal female cousins; they were the only "youth" who did not laugh at my autistic fidgeting behaviors(While I was present, at least). I would sit in a corner and fidget with pencils for hours.

(Heh...)

Yes. Mother suffers from narcolepsy and would grab me if I woke her up by dropping items while fidgeting. This meant being grabbed very forcefully by the neck and having the item repeatedly shoved in my face to demonstrate the embarrassment she would have if someone saw me doing it.

As a young child, I actually had OCD traits from ASD, though I never realized it until I was an adult. Whenever I had negative sexual thoughts, I was fearful of divine punishment and would repeatedly say "No, no, no" three or four times after each occurrence while rubbing my ears. The sexual thoughts sometimes occurred while I was fidgeting with knives.

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I have ASD-related health anxiety and experience paranoia regarding Lyssavirus(Rabies), where I have sensations of bat saliva dripping on my skin. This is why I stopped reading rabies case studies, as they would give me paresthesia.

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Admittedly, I engaged in a sort of "partying" as well as a young child. That is, the "party" of visiting my half-cousins from morning until night.

Hours spent fidgeting in corners with a pencil(Dropped repeatedly) as my parents violently argued at home. I'd leave and immediately hear my father's anger after entering the car.

I was homeschooled due to health problems and bullying, which meant I sat in isolation daily while my parents constantly argued and hit each-other. My father would unlock our house door after work each day and start violent confrontations with Mother. I'd sit in my room and fidget while they were arguing.

Yes. As a child, people would stare at my fidgeting and laugh at me. Adults, youth, et cetera...Mother often grabbed me and repeatedly told me that I looked "m-e-n-t-a-l-l-y r-e-t-a-r-d-e-d" while fidgeting.

Countless times since I was a young child. They'd laugh:

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(This is how I look when I start fidgeting with objects. Strangers would look at me in disgust or laugh at me, which is why I hid it when I was an adolescent)

Make Threatening Gestures:

(They've uttered insults at me; called me a "sweaty punk"; threatened me with violence)

Mother would've recorded me fidgeting and showed it to my grandmother so she could criticize me and tell me, "What are you doing with your hands? Stop all that". She also would've told me I was an embarrassment for fidgeting.

My half-relatives would always go upstairs when I'd have to stay over.

As I recall, the reason was "disgust", despite me being an autistic male fidgeting near the door/kitchen of their apartment.

Cannot say.

I'll elaborate on my paternal history, a bit:

I'd visit my paternal grandparents when I was a young child, often because my parents were arguing at home. While visiting, my younger cousin would use my grandparents' computer. I would sit on the sidelines and fidget with pencils and other objects, dropping them and upsetting my paternal grandfather.

My mother, as kind as she may be, used to grab me very forcefully(By the neck, as I was fidgeting with items; I would ache from it) and repeatedly tell me "Do you hear me!?! If people see you doing that, they will think you are men-tally retar-ded!" while shaking me and shaking the item near my eyes. She would tell me how embarrassing it is to have an autistic son who fidgets with items as a form of stimulation. Other times, she would hit me. When I said, "Please don't hit me!" once, she started laughing.

Or the time...a certain youth(Step-relative) arrived and was immediately given a ranch-chicken seasoned dish. I was sitting on the side watching, receiving nothing. Strangely, someone told me I asked for food. Yet I was sitting:

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I was sitting left-most, the youth on the upward adjacent chair.

Supposedly, I begged for food despite spending hours fidgeting with objects and waiting for Mother to arrive. Though I do recall becoming a bit sad when her own children were given food and worried that I would receive nothing. Van Kamp fish.

My younger paternal cousin was quite playful with me. Sadly, I was once reprimanded for mimicking Mother's hand gestures.

When I was a young child...I'd fidget with objects in stores, restaurants, et cetera...

 

[TheValeYard]

People will assume you are creepy and weird and permanently avoid you.

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

I'll be having a "Vanilla latte"(Cookies) tonight.

 

[dirtyricecel]

I have to watch how other people talk and remember them to use in appropriate situation and what not
I have to learn how to gather social cues from my surrounding and remember their pattern to choose the correct word/emotion/mood for that situation

People also mention I say creepy/inappropriate stuff sometime eventho they seem normal to me

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

People will assume you are creepy and weird and permanently avoid you.

.

My grandmother would often ask me to do things for her. I obediently tried to follow her instructions and received denigration as a result. She would yell at me and say things like "Look! Use your eyes!"(Because I was anxious and had visual processing issues), "Did you hear me!?! That isn't the way I told you to do it!"(When I would drop things or make mistakes because I was sweating and anxious out of fear of upsetting her). She would tell me "Put your head up. No one did anything to you" because I was too anxious to make eye contact with her.

I've had women avoid me as much as possible. On one occasion, a foid quickly blocked me from sitting next to her on a very crowded bus. Another fell(wearing sandals) on the ground and accused me of pushing her until her foid friend said "It wasn't him".

Note that I had no friends or associates outside of group therapy and yet was being asked to pander to a pretty White lass with shallow thinking. This was during a time when I was being verbally and physically abused by one of my parents for being unable to function like NTs.

Yes. 2016 was much different. I spent hours sitting alone in my room with bottles of urine and sacks of feces because of severe depression/anxiety. I was barely eating and suffering from visual sensory overload/paranoia, which often caused me to curdle into a ball and cry. I received little help for these problems.

As for Shannon Rose...homecoming! Raves! Worship from mentally-ill orbiters! Partial hospitalization for her "severe mental illnesses"! Two stints in the psychiatric hospital! Anything for Queen Shay!

Oh, you don't need to apologize; I'll explain:

I have maladaptive daydreaming(MDD) from autism. I've had constant daydreaming/fantasies of my experiences in group therapy for over eight years now. My fantasies of those experiences mesh together with my newer memories, resulting in situations where I envision myself "interacting with"(seeking approval from) certain youth I respected in the group for anything of value I do.

Your experiences are different yet have similarities with my own.

"E", the 6'+ Tyrone who bullied me in a group commune, would watch me whenever I'd eat with the rest of the youth and start snickering. He'd make mocking jokes about me and laugh.

This is how I dressed:

(Hooded, which I started using so they couldn't see me)

"As long as he doesn't come downstairs" - After throwing dice at my door and laughing with his White friend.

...

Yes, the negligent 12-year-old Shannon would often leave her "goal sheet" at home. This was a sheet intended to be document a child's day at school and home. Shannon was always given a pass for this, but other youth were not. The group psychologist referred to Shannon as "honey" and "sweetie" each day. Special treatment for privileged White femoids.

Again, the anxious Shannon:

(Movie theatre)

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

.

When I last saw them, over four years ago, they seemed to dislike me.

"We didn't want to see you. Granny told us to help you." - They also kept whining and complaining.

She also kicked our seven-year-old cousin in the abdomen due to frustration.

BPD and bipolar are the given excuses.

Cool. My half-cousins threw cake batter at me when I tried to aid them with a recipe, as Mother instructed.

I overheard them lying to step-grandfather.

A worthless chink

My half-cousin would batter me when I was younger.

You're not worthless. Your people are a noble people.

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

.

When I was eighteen, two Somali boys called me a "future school shooter" because of my severe ASD-related social dissociation and severe anxiety.

"Sup Nig-guh" (Tall White male)

"Nah, you Nigger"

"Looks like we've got a mouse in the house"

"He's a freak"

"I'll kick his little ass around" (Same person who took pictures of my naked body and laughed with his roommate)

"Future school shooter" (Somali boys)

 

[kretschmer]

it sucks

 

[strange_to_be]

I'd say I get along with high IQ people really well. I work at a fortune 500 STEM company and all of the people in the STEM jobs I can communicate with. However, custodial staff, the food service people, the construction workers around site, and the occasional moron who slips through the cracks in the hiring process, and gets fired in like 6 months to a year, some of the staff that have been shuffled off into simplified support positions where they can't do harm all seem borderline retarded to me and they all think I'm stupid because I can't communicate with them.

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

I'll be having a "Vanilla latte"(Cookies) tonight.

Cookie Dough, it seems. Oh well.

I have Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria from ASD/ADHD. In those days, this was the sort of personality I had:

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My father would often denigrate me for my autistic traits and sometimes hit me. I was a heavily-depressed/anxious "puppet" for Normies to string around. I wasn't even comfortable with asking to go to the bathroom or looking around the therapy room due to fear of criticism.

Yes, I remember my final day in group therapy well. I was heavily depressed, as usual. It was cloudy and raining. A certain Black youth told me, "Intellau, go over there."(As usual), and I obeyed him out of a desire for peaceful group time. A kid by the name of "Sean", another Black youth, criticized my writing and said "Wow....Intellau's writing is terrible"(He was handing out our goal sheets for the day); he also made sure to read my "discharge" certificate. I kept my discharge secret so I wouldn't be laughed at by my group "mates".

And as usual, on the drive home, the young girls in my transportation van started hitting me and drawing on me. Why? Simple:

Yes, I remember group therapy well...

Shannon Rose Bosanac frowned at me because I looked at her briefly during "process group". The group leader responded by placing her in another group out of concern for her progress/"mental safety".

Given that we are of opposite races, I believe it was also due to an incident involving an "interracial pairing" in the group. The male of that pairing took the (White) female outside and did "things" with her near a river.

Indeed, the pairing was of a Black male and White femoid. The White femoid appeared to have racial identity issues("I want to be Black") stemming from adoption into a liberal family. She met the male during his hospitalization for violent behavior while in group therapy.

I suspect that the program manager worried deeply about the idea of young "beautiful" Shannon being influenced by a 5'2, 98lbs ethnic boy with severe anxiety.

No, though most seats were taken by the time I arrived...

I sat between a young male named "Leajandro" and a foid named "Gwendolyn"...Gwendolyn never looked at me whereas Leajandro informed our teacher of two boys whispering and laughing at me.

Leajandro...

When I was in group therapy, an adopted Cuban boy named "Leajandro" was present. He had a foster brother named "Isaiah" and a foster mother named "Donna". He complimented my striped shirt and I complimented his clothes as well. He also informed the group leader of a boy laughing at my use of stress balls.



For that activity, I was asked to speak to any member of the group. I spoke only to the group psychologist and Leajandro.

When the groups split, Leajandro's final day was the day after the split.

We were the only two youth left, barring Sean, a new kid:

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I've had negative experiences with Latinos in the past. A certain Chadlito used to gossip and bully(physically/verbally) me when I lived in a commune. Also, a Latino once insulted("Bitch, nobody gives a fuck about you") me on the bus because he disliked my anxious behavior; I had a headache.

However, someone I once respected seemed like a kind Latina.

You're reminding me of my first stint in group therapy. Youth would nearly always overlook me. Some blatantly insulted me and made statements such as "Intellau, you know no one wants to partner with you. Go over to the table and sit alone", "Tsk"(Directed at me), "No one likes him! He acts like a female! Why do I have to go to the 'Quiet Room'?".

The only exception was when a certain kind youth joined my group. He treated me respectfully and showed concern for my obvious anxiety and social ineptitude; I was his partner for one group assignment, and it went very well.

 

[Intellau_Celistic]

.

When I last saw them, over four years ago, they seemed to dislike me.

"We didn't want to see you. Granny told us to help you." - They also kept whining and complaining.

That was the day I wore Mother's poncho. I decided to keep it permanently, and it aided me well in Minneapolis.

(I wore it daily)

As do I. People sometimes assume I am a femoid if I cover my body fully.

Yes. This is the very reason why I started covering myself with hoodies after leaving group therapy. I did not want to be judged by the people I met there in the regular hospital setting.

I once lived in a youth commune.

A girl there would sometimes sit by me and use the computers. I recall her calling her mother and telling her to "have a good day at work".

Minutes later, she coughed repeatedly and said, "Oh I'm sorry. Did I bother you?". She also walked past me on another occasion and said "You're always covering yourself with a blanket like anyone wants to know your business" in an angry tone.