You're being very charitable by assuming the people who laugh derisively or act scandalized when the unloved and unwanted spew a little vitriol aren't aware the phenomenon you've described. If they were oblivious to it, well, all of their nastiness could actually be justified. They would be innocents peering into dark places entirely foreign to them, exposed to the fury the creatures relegated to such places. Can you imagine how frightening that would be? Here before them are men spewing hateful words, angry rhetoric, gnashing their teeth and dreaming of lashing out in violence. All of this hatred, and no apparent reason for it whatsoever! If they truly believed all of the fury of the unloved arose ex nihilo, they would have every right to find themselves disgusted by it.
Yet this defense falls apart in very short order when one realizes that the people who demonize us aren't innocents; they know why the men down in this place have become the frightening things they perceive us to be. They are human beings, after all. Though they've known love, they've also experienced rejection. Though much of their lives they've been surrounded by friends, they've had their moments of loneliness. They all have some understanding, however dimly or superficially, what a lack of affection can do to the human spirit. They've all lashed out in anger when spurned, they've all had their nasty thoughts of revenge after suffering some infidelity or guilty little experiences of schadenfreude when a romantic rival suffers some humiliation. Having played the imp themselves at some point in their lives, they know all too well why things like us have become devils.
Which is why all of their self-righteous outrage at the anger expressed by the incels is so nauseating. They're hypocrites, lying both to themselves and to us.
So these good men and women will continue to try to exorcise us, drive us out and back into the solitude ghouls like us belong lest they see something familiar, almost human, about the things they claim to find so horrible.
For what it's worth, what little solace it may provide, regardless of how much incense they surround themselves with, their holy words will always be stained by the faintest stink of sulfur.
Both sides curse. The only difference is that we do so honestly.