Thanks fren I feel you too. I'm only a year younger but I completely get where you're coming from. The hardest part is not giving up when our backs are against the wall.
Ive been thru thick and thin in this hellscape, Imma see how much longer i can take.
Thanks for the ispiration about the backs against the wall, The world has cuffed us to a landpost and were unable to move, Theres a car coming to ram us but it never comes, Its an endless loop and the ship is sailing, The ship that was supposed to take you away from the neverending scene, The whole world is just a never ending bad mushroom trip and we are the main actors of suffering, We can never have a good trip because the people in it we were supposed to interact with are hostile,
We were once young and blesssed with life, We were just innocent kids playing in the sand unbeknownst of the urges and needs of the adult life, We were coming home after family pick us up, Our family would either be bad or it would be good, But atleast we had people around, As we age we are treated worse and worse and we dont understand why? Why couldnt i have friends like in kindergarten? Why can i not have a girlfriend now as im an adult, Is there something wrong with me? The question keeps going and going and going, Until you stumble upon the blackpill, ST Hamudi and ER looks you dead in the eye and welcomes you with their manifesto, You start and delve deeper and deeper and see how crooked this world is, You see that everyone is selfish and out for themselves and will not hesitate to throw you under the bus, You go thru college, High school, University whatever it might be trying to stay above water, You study study study, Rot in your dormroom after that like a drone, I know because i did, All my advances at making friends as a semi adult and adult has been severically hard and painful and they have failed most of the times, I thought college would be different, GOD I WAS WRONG!
Ended up waging, Eat, Wage, Game, Sleep, Repeat.
The life of an incel gets even crueler the more you age, People will think of you as a pedophile or a creep and adults and kids will make fun of you as you walk the street,
You cannot sit in the park because people will think you are a creep for just sitting there and looking out at the grass because there are people infront of it.
The stigma of being ugly and growing older doesnt end there, People will either tell you or think that you are a strain on society and the economy and they will wish you died off aleredy when your hair is graying and your aging.
We slip further away into our soul as we barricade it like nazi zombies from call of duty, The zombies are your negative thoughts and they want in, Into your head, You say to yourself its not over but then the rounds end and your an 80 year old man with nothing to show for it.
You see people come and go, The nurse eventually retires and you have to start all over, You thought you had a friend at old age but that friend died in a coma last week and no one told you, You are grieving in your room and try to cope with the others in the public cardgameroom at the old daycare for old fucks, There is no escape, The chains of inceldom will always follow you and the journey ends once we have perished.
The life as we know it ends and only then it is over,
Some may die young and some will reach the daycare.
The most beautiful place can be hell if you have to expirience it alone - ER
