TeeHee This is the fate of the beta orbiter: I kissed another man, twice. Now my husband wants a divorce.

[BlackOpsIIcel]

One Smooch Over the LineI kissed another man, twice. Now my husband wants a divorce.

Dear Prudence,
I am at rock bottom. I love my husband more than anything in this world, but I cheated on him. I kissed another man—twice. He wants a divorce. I want to spend the rest of my life with him, but things between us have been frayed for some time now. For the past six months, every conversation we have had has been filled with irritation and defensiveness. It doesn’t seem like he likes me at all. We both have been preoccupied with our phones and no longer communicate at all. He doesn’t seem interested in me and I have often wondered if he wanted to leave me. The only time he seems happy with me is when I do my chores and contribute to the housework. He is very stressed and overwhelmed, but we both work full-time and I do my best to help around the house.

He has a wonderful daughter whom I love dearly. There has always been pressure on me to be her full-on mother, and I think those expectations are stressful for both of us. He never seems satisfied with my level of contribution or participation, and as a result, my relationship with his daughter can feel strained. I have communicated that I want to be a trusted adult she can have fun with and am his backup support when he needs me. I want to cook for her, take her shopping, and watch movies. He needs me to be her June Cleaver.

My husband is a wonderful person, but we both come from traumatic backgrounds. While he doesn’t have a drinking problem, he is a bad drinker, and all of his trauma comes out in a way that is upsetting to me. I have expressed my discomfort with his drinking many times over the years and he brushes me off. I felt alone, unliked, and unwanted, and I looked to someone else to remind me that I am a person worth talking to. My husband and I only talk about chores and money. We are capable of so much more, and there is a real, profound love between us. I made a huge mistake in kissing someone else, and I feel disgusted that I could hurt him like this. I would never do this again. He has agreed to counseling, but every day he changes his mind and says he wants a divorce. He wants to talk to the man I kissed, and I agreed—but actually I think that would be unwise and unhelpful. I want to prove to him that I love him and am committed to rebuilding our marriage. Prudence, he trusts you and listens to your podcast/reads your column regularly—what do I do?
—Desperate for Forgiveness

I’m sorry to hear that your husband is a regular reader of the column, given how little that’s seemed to help him in his personal life. You say that he’s a “wonderful person,” but no evidence for that made it into your letter. He doesn’t seem to like you, you two have barely spoken except about chores in six months, he’s not satisfied with your performance as a wonderful stepmother but expects you to act like a Stepford parent to his daughter (even though neither you nor she want that from one another), he constantly makes you feel inadequate, he abuses alcohol and dismisses your concerns around it, he threatens to divorce you on a daily basis, he jerks you around when it comes to going to couples counseling, and instead of dealing with any of these issues, he wants to meet the man you kissed twice, as if that man could possibly have any answers or information useful to him.

Frankly, I’m amazed you only kissed this guy twice. You must have extraordinary willpower, because anyone in the marriage you’ve described, no matter how much they loved their partner, would be looking frantically for a self-destruct button just to change something. I think your faith that the two of you are capable of so much more is misplaced. Your husband isn’t interested in developing more with you, and you can’t fix this marriage without his participation. I don’t think you should feel disgusted with yourself. Yes, kissing someone else went against the terms of your marriage, but your marriage is unbearable. The only time your husband is happy with you is when you’re doing chores. That’s grim. I think you should go to a counselor by yourself and figure out how to get the support you need as you pursue a divorce, rather than waiting to find out when your husband will make good on his threat to file first.

 

[Mickeyonacid]

She doesn't love him more than anything else in the world like she claims, because if she did she wouldn't have cheated on him. The replies are disgusting, saying she shouldn't feel ashamed of herself. People like this need to be punished.
"Frankly, I’m amazed you only kissed this guy twice." The degeneracy of women in 2018 is absolutely revolting

 

[acnescarcel]

lol aren't these whores the ones always harping on about blaming the victim? guy gets cheated on and he's supposed to be a good cuck and kiss her ass afterwards?

 

[Pasteleiro]

At least bold the main shit my g

 

[Mickeyonacid]

lol aren't these whores the ones always harping on about blaming the victim? guy gets cheated on and he's supposed to be a good cuck and kiss her ass afterwards?

Women will always side with their fellow woman in situations like this. They are incapable of feeling any sympathy for the man.

 

[Deleted member 5861]

MEN are the ones who are oppressed in this day and age.

 

[acnescarcel]

At least bold the main shit my g

tl;dr whore does what whores do. drives man to drink and not want to talk and break up. whore original whore gets advice from says you should've been a bigger whore because he drinks and doesn't want to go to therapy to talk about not being a happy cuck.

 

[Solitarian_Walker]

You go girl, cheat on that cuck.

 

[Gokugetem]

She doesn't love him more than anything else in the world like she claims, because if she did she wouldn't have cheated on him. The replies are disgusting, saying she shouldn't feel ashamed of herself. People like this need to be punished.
"Frankly, I’m amazed you only kissed this guy twice." The degeneracy of women in 2018 is absolutely revolting

Society is sick, no doubt about it. Unless she lives in one of a few states, her infidelity wouldn't even be a factor in what she takes from him either.

At a minimum, cheating on your husband/wife needs to be a felony punishable by jail time. And should the other partner choose to divorce, the adulterer should get nothing..... Just like the pre-Reagan days.

 

[Mickeyonacid]

At a minimum, cheating on your husband/wife needs to be a felony punishable by jail time

Heavily agree

 

[DyingInside]

MEN are the ones who are oppressed in this day and age.

Yep, but everybody is too cucked to see it

 

[Kirishima]

MEN are the ones who are oppressed in this day and age.

At a minimum, cheating on your husband/wife needs to be a felony punishable by jail time. And should the other partner choose to divorce, the adulterer should get nothing..... Just like the pre-Reagan days.

 

[NEETAndTidy]

She doesn't love him more than anything else in the world like she claims, because if she did she wouldn't have cheated on him. The replies are disgusting, saying she shouldn't feel ashamed of herself. People like this need to be punished.
"Frankly, I’m amazed you only kissed this guy twice." The degeneracy of women in 2018 is absolutely revolting

UGH.
WHAT THE FUCK
This is fucking disgusting. Cheaters should be stoned to death. Fuck women and their degeneracy.