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It's Over The trend of nerds self-destructing like "kamikaze" with highly-demanding creative projects

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I've noticed this trend lately where nerdy guys who have some basic know-how about computers, coding, etc, will decide that their time is better spent not focusing on leisure, copes, making money or getting rejected by girls, but on embarking on some kind of massive digital creative project, like a solo video game project, to try and prove their worth and impress everyone with their skill and perseverence.

So far, so good, right? After all, men proving and challenging themselves is nothing new, it's always been done.

The problem is when it turns out that unlike painting or writing, this type of multimedia project takes very many years to complete even with great discipline and gruelling working hours if you're mostly on your own, and the men involved demonstrate how willing they are to flirt with complete burnout, aggravated mental illness and low odds of market success just to get to the finish line.
I think this is where the desperation begins to show, along with the ugly head of male inadequacy in our current society, where lesser males feel like they need to demonstrate superhuman abilities before they will be worthy of approval and a good mate.
It's a very new type of desperate flexing that's not too far away from roiding and injecting and accumulating muscle and joint injuries.


This article gives you a quick birds' eye view of the problem, but I believe the problem to be much worse from what I've seen. Many male developers in a solitary situation feel obligated to soldier on desperately while privately complaining about mental health issues, suicidal ideation and their new anti-depressant prescriptions.

Eventually with the project's completion, and the subsequent analysis of the results of the "hail mary", arrives the come down...

The creator of Blue Revolver, a space shoot 'em up that sold modestly and needed tons of work and support to keep sales trickling in.



The creator of Iconoclasts, a well-received game that nevertheless hardly created the splash you would expect from a project with a 7 year development time.



Indeed...who could have guessed that a bunch of these lonely, unsupported guys going for these "hail mary" projects alone would end up completely destroyed mentally, asking people to convince them not to rope or temporarily institutionalizing themselves, especially if they were incel throughout the entire process, with no support network and not so much as a shoulder rub... going and going and going because every signal they got from society told them that it's 'do or die' if you're not a top male specimen.

Don't forget, these are real people who said to themselves "Fuck this, I'm not going to just lie down and take it, I'm going to use what I know, work every day and dig myself out of this hole, I'm going to become somebody." and still ended up like this.
 
Us incels truly are smarter than these men, a true genius male would know the only path is to lay down and rot until death.
 
They’re Low T soylords (JFL at being an indie game developer) who bought the follow your passion meme.
 
i loved iconoclast it was quite a goodgames, shame all kiddos are playing lol fortnite, and other nomie trash
They’re Low T soylords (JFL at being an indie game developer) who bought the follow your passion meme.
indie market is over saturated, being a indie game dev nowdays is suicide
 
fuck that shit i have no talents and LDAR is better
 
They’re Low T soylords (JFL at being an indie game developer) who bought the follow your passion meme.

a lot of people do, maybe even me, but now i would definitely consider it again.

i loved iconoclast it was quite a goodgames, shame all kiddos are playing lol fortnite, and other nomie trash

indie market is over saturated, being a indie game dev nowdays is suicide
i liked it too even if it had some cucked shit, it was not in your face and the game was well done.
the fact that people still go so hard and sacrifice so much despite the state of the market says a lot imo... things will only get more desperate among men.
 
a lot of people do, maybe even me, but now i would definitely consider it again.


i liked it too even if it had some cucked shit, it was not in your face and the game was well done.
the fact that people still go so hard and sacrifice so much despite the state of the market says a lot imo... things will only get more desperate among men.
i really felt the game suffered from exaustion, you can see the earlie content had a better quality than the later

it was a bit cucked, but the overall quality of the game made up for it
 
anyway, one last note that my point here with this thread is that while it's well known that when you as a man feel you have no leverage and no power and nothing to lose, your risk taking is amplified to the fullest.

you really act like you have nothing to lose, and I want to show that this male impulse is not reserved to impulsive low-IQ "meathead" or "gambler" types, it can trigger just as intensely and destructively in nerdy obsessive high-IQ types that are common nowadays, who will destroy themselves just as hard in risky and dangerous ventures, trying to raise their status at all cost.
 
Being successful has more to do with being attractive, having connections and luck. Some of the most untalented people are the most successful.
 
the fact that people still go so hard and sacrifice so much despite the state of the market says a lot imo... things will only get more desperate among men.
Desperation among men is a recipe for disaster.
 
They’re Low T soylords (JFL at being an indie game developer) who bought the follow your passion meme.
What the fuck did you just say about our lord and savior?
Bildresultat för terry davis
 
anyway, one last note that my point here with this thread is that while it's well known that when you as a man feel you have no leverage and no power and nothing to lose, your risk taking is amplified to the fullest.

you really act like you have nothing to lose, and I want to show that this male impulse is not reserved to impulsive low-IQ "meathead" or "gambler" types, it can trigger just as intensely and destructively in nerdy obsessive high-IQ types that are common nowadays, who will destroy themselves just as hard in risky and dangerous ventures, trying to raise their status at all cost.
Makes me wonder about the overall arching umbrella of potential mental health problems we are facing nowadays as a whole.
 
Being successful has more to do with being attractive, having connections and luck. Some of the most untalented people are the most successful.

very true. incels' connections are hard to build and wither quickly, yet they are crucial.
and you already know my opinion on "luck". there is no "luck" in 2019 any more than there are products on shelves in a communist shithole.

Makes me wonder about the overall arching umbrella of potential mental health problems we are facing nowadays as a whole.
it is very bad. the fact that even the risk-taking instincts of relatively calm, collected, smart men get fired into overdrive like this should be a warning sign. but it isn't. because men can go eat shit.
 
This is super high IQ OP and very personally relevant as I have fallen victim to this type of cope for many years myself.

There's a couple aspects to it to consider. First of all, it's not necessarily a bad thing, since life is meaningless anyway and we're all just trying to fill our time before we die. BUT the issue is where does this drive come from? Like you said it comes from a society that no longer values men and thus demands more and more from us just to let us have a chance of getting laid or having financial independence.

So while in the 1960s your aspiration might have just have been to become a low level manager at a company after 5-10 years of paying your dues, now your aspiration is to be the next Zuckerberg or create something that changes the world. Because that's the only way you can imagine yourself mattering or being important enough.

It's been said that most of men's greatest accomplishments typically come in their 20s and 30s, and this is because we are doing it in part to try to impress women. Once that drive passes, the creative urge starts to die out. Men are so desperate now to impress women that they are trying to accomplish more than any man reasonably can.

This is really fascinating to me. I didn't know this was happening to other men as well. I bet it will continue to happen and only get worse over time. If they were blackpilled, they'd realize doing steroids and getting jaw implants would have been a much faster pathway to their goal. Too bad for them.
 
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If they were blackpilled, they'd realize doing steroids and getting jaw implants would have been a much faster pathway to their goal. Too bad for them.
To soyboys, steroids and plastic surgery are ‘unnatural’. Unlikely that you will find soyboys using these things.

Steroids and plastic surgery are expensive. You must have the financial resources first to be able to ascend this way.
 
very legit post. I went through something similar years ago. This and LDAR are two sides of the same coin IMO.
 
This is super high IQ OP and very personally relevant as I have fallen victim to this type of cope for many years myself.

There's a couple aspects to it to consider. First of all, it's not necessarily a bad thing, since life is meaningless anyway and we're all just trying to fill our time before we die. BUT the issue is where does this drive come from? Like you said it comes from a society that no longer values men and thus demands more and more from us just to let us have a chance of getting laid or having financial independence.

So while in the 1960s your aspiration might have just have been to become a low level manager at a company after 5-10 years of paying your dues, now your aspiration is to be the next Zuckerberg or create something that changes the world. Because that's the only way you can imagine yourself mattering or being important enough.

It's been said that most of men's greatest accomplishments typically come in their 20s and 30s, and this is because we are doing it in part to try to impress women. Once that drive passes, the creative urge starts to die out. Men are so desperate now to impress women that they are trying to accomplish more than any man reasonably can.

This is really fascinating to me. I didn't know this was happening to other men as well. I bet it will continue to happen and only get worse over time. If they were blackpilled, they'd realize doing steroids and getting jaw implants would have been a much faster pathway to their goal. Too bad for them.

Thank you, it's a very personal post for me too, this basic mentality grabbed me without me even realising it some years ago. It's only when I saw it in others and how badly it ended for them that I put two and two together.

I don't think it's a bad thing either, if you have a reasonable chance of success or nothing better to do, but it's my belief that most of today's "kamikazes" could have lead comfortable normie lives just 15-20 years earlier, rather than being forced to choose between lethargy or self-destructive amounts of work.

You're right that the main issue is men trying to accomplish more than any one man can, it's fine and good to become enamoured to an idea, it could be an excellent idea, but it's that desire to try and acquire all or most of the fame from bringing it to fruition and to launch blindly forward and persevere even without the necessary support that gives away the huge gap in the male ego inflicted by society and the desperation to fill it.

I'm happy to have shared this with you, I see you definitely know where I'm coming from with this. It's certainly going to get worse as technologically-minded men's desperation increases and authoring tools become easier to use, only a total crash of certain industries could put a stop to it. At last the odds of success would be too low to be worth the senseless male sacrifice.
 
anyway, one last note that my point here with this thread is that while it's well known that when you as a man feel you have no leverage and no power and nothing to lose, your risk taking is amplified to the fullest.

you really act like you have nothing to lose, and I want to show that this male impulse is not reserved to impulsive low-IQ "meathead" or "gambler" types, it can trigger just as intensely and destructively in nerdy obsessive high-IQ types that are common nowadays, who will destroy themselves just as hard in risky and dangerous ventures, trying to raise their status at all cost.

- dwarf fortress guy is a literal NEET type who LDAR's while working on dwarf fortress. and no one has heard of him yet his game is pretty popular.
not really sure why those men thought making an indie game was their path to salvation.

- men are working harder and harder for less and less, things that came EASY to men 15-20+ years ago
a sign of a shitty economy and fucked up gov. it's like brazil, you're either a high level politician, top tier rich, or a high level cartel member
no middle class or stable normies.

- jock version of the indie game guys are strongmen / powerlifter / bodybuilder types who kill their bodies just to win a shitty plastic trophy
 
very legit post. I went through something similar years ago. This and LDAR are two sides of the same coin IMO.

you're right, if the normal middleground has no worthy rewards, you will feel pushed into either one extreme or the other.

- dwarf fortress guy is a literal NEET type who LDAR's while working on dwarf fortress. and no one has heard of him yet his game is pretty popular.
not really sure why those men thought making an indie game was their path to salvation.

- men are working harder and harder for less and less, things that came EASY to men 15-20+ years ago
a sign of a shitty economy and fucked up gov. it's like brazil, you're either a high level politician, top tier rich, or a high level cartel member
no middle class or stable normies.

- jock version of the indie game guys are strongmen / powerlifter / bodybuilder types who kill their bodies just to win a shitty plastic trophy
theoretically a well done game that doesn't look like tick-tack-toe will get you out of the house, to expos and developer roundtables etc.. whether you'll meet anyone or get anywhere in those places is another story.

i actually wouldn't mind if it was just a steady gradient of men working harder, it's the full-blown kamikazes that scare me.

yeah I've already touched on the roider comparison a little in the OP, it's a great comparison
 
It blows my mind that anyone would have the drive to accomplish any highly demanding task if he's sex starved. It absolutely amazes me. Not only is your pursuit ultimately meaningless in the grand scheme of things - assuming you're highly unlikely to get rich -, passive low effort hobbies are infinitely more rewarding, both on a physical and intellectual level; You're almost always better off gaming, browsing forums or reading a high quality newspaper online than trying to be successful at some business venture.
 
I absolutely agree OP, it’s an accurate observation. In my opinion, the problem occurs when you compound an element of an obsessive personality with a marginal talent that you may have, and decide to take it to the nth degree as a coping mechanism.

I’ve been a victim of that mentality myself, although I always burn out quickly when I realize my own shortcomings against an ambitious project and look around and say to myself ‘hey, no one is here to support me, and even if I get good and finish something that’s worthwhile, no one is going to be there to praise me’. It’s worthless without a support network.

A lot of men however become embroiled in this workaholic tunnel vision, where they refuse to acknowledge any massive personal problems in exchange for feeling ‘worthy’ while embarking on some personal project that’s way above their batting league. Even if they see it all the way through, they start to have massive troubles when it comes to bringing those projects onto the real world - they crash and burn at the stage of financing, promoting, and making their project stand out. They also become hypersensitive to any criticism because of this - their ego is tightly attached to their creation.

I wouldn’t say that it’s an incel issue per se, but it’s definitely something that I’d make a guess as to how it’s a rising phenomenon among young men nowadays. Pressures of modern life and whatnot.
 
It blows my mind that anyone would have the drive to accomplish any highly demanding task if he's sex starved. It absolutely amazes me. Not only is your pursuit ultimately meaningless in the grand scheme of things - assuming you're highly unlikely to get rich -, passive low effort hobbies are infinitely more rewarding, both on a physical and intellectual level; You're almost always better off gaming, browsing forums or reading a high quality newspaper online than trying to be successful at some business venture.

having a mission, no matter how retarded, distracts you from realizing how lonely you are
 
It blows my mind that anyone would have the drive to accomplish any highly demanding task if he's sex starved. It absolutely amazes me. Not only is your pursuit ultimately meaningless in the grand scheme of things - assuming you're highly unlikely to get rich -, passive low effort hobbies are infinitely more rewarding, both on a physical and intellectual level; You're almost always better off gaming, browsing forums or reading a high quality newspaper online than trying to be successful at some business venture.

Low IQ post.

As someone who is currently hobbiemaxxing (learning math,programming,drawing and japanese) I have to disagree, the way of living you are describing will only bring regret and brain damage.




 
OP, the developer's downfall is spending 7 years on a game and expecting riches or fame from it. Working on a personal project can be seen as a specialized and more intense form of LDAR, but it should by no means be considered a get rich quick path. That's putting the cart before the horse. If money comes, it will come, but it shouldn't have been expected. If he had enjoyed making the game and didn't expect much more than that, he probably wouldn't have been as suicidal as he ended up afterward. It's not self-destruction to work on games alone for years, but it's overexpectation that drove him to the brink.
 
Funny part is that these games probably aren’t good. Chad just makes some new maps and slaps a paint job on call of duty/battlefield/madden/fifa and its still more fun than these games.
 
Being successful has more to do with being attractive, having connections and luck. Some of the most untalented people are the most successful.
or 500 iq like jeff bentos or bill gates, mark zuckberg , but anyway we are no where near this ultra geniuses
 
Funny part is that these games probably aren’t good. Chad just makes some new maps and slaps a paint job on call of duty/battlefield/madden/fifa and its still more fun than these games.

cuphead was made by a semi-indie chad dev who DID actually go to cons and got some fame
 
having a mission, no matter how retarded, distracts you from realizing how lonely you are

That mission should always be pragmatic. Either to get you laid, enrich your intellect or provide you with some palpable value. Otherwise, just maximize your comfort and minimize discomfort.

If by mission you mean trying to invent something for the sake of it, writing a book or career maxing beyond what's necessary for your daily copes then I completely disagree.

Low IQ post.

As someone who is currently hobbiemaxxing (learning math,programming,drawing and japanese) I have to disagree, the way of living you are describing will only bring regret and brain damage.







You're missing my point. If you enjoy doing what you do then good for you. If you don't you're wasting you're time. Virtually all men with huge ambitions don't enjoy their miserable pursuits. No one works 9 hours straight on some project and enjoys it more than gaming or LDARing with copes. If they did, they wouldn't demand monetary gain.
 
Us incels truly are smarter than these men, a true genius male would know the only path is to lay down and rot until death.
Those who are truely smart and in our position have already forced deaths hand.
 
OP, the developer's downfall is spending 7 years on a game and expecting riches or fame from it. Working on a personal project can be seen as a specialized and more intense form of LDAR, but it should by no means be considered a get rich quick path. That's putting the cart before the horse. If money comes, it will come, but it shouldn't have been expected. If he had enjoyed making the game and didn't expect much more than that, he probably wouldn't have been as suicidal as he ended up afterward. It's not self-destruction to work on games alone for years, but it's overexpectation that drove him to the brink.
there's no way to detach yourself when that much work is involved, especially the final stages where you have to polish, test and make your product hardware compatible and audience accessible which is awful and no fun at all, and explicitly serves the audience.

like mylifeistrash's plastic trophy comparison...imagine going through the whole shebang then another 4-5 months just of debugging, testing and packaging and paperwork. and your only reward is some less cash than you put in or could have made, some retweets and some text from a guy with a furry avatar saying "YOU CHANGED MY LIFE DUDE!"
 
BASIC INCOME OR FUCKING DEATH! :yes:
 
They realise that careermaxxing and making 100k a year while doing stressful office work 8 hours a day isn't enough for modern day foids and who would want to wageslave without the reward of a loyal wife?

It's either you ascend into the millions or rot away in loneliness, and unfortunately for these cucks they don't realise that most businesses and startups fail miserably.
 
this thread really hit me right in the feels. A cope for me was creativity maxxing in my 20s to where I burned out in my 30s and had a nervous breakdown. was in the vidya industry and everything. fucking sucked. I think I went from doomer -> soyboy -> boomer (in my 30s now). I feel bad for those game devs but they did it to themselves. better to make 100% blackpill games if you decide to go that route, instead of virtue signal on twitter all day and try to appeal to mindless foids who won't play your games anyway.
 
The faggiest dudes I can think of are the Fez dev and the Night in the Woods dev. Their twitter leaks soy from the computer monitor.
I've become so nihilistic. The only game devs I respect are full-on misanthropic NEETS like notch and terry davis. We need a ted kaczynski of vidya to make america great again.
 
I've always dreamed of writing a book - I even have the outline for a plot ready. I just haven't got into it for this exact same reason - I'm scared of what comes after. I've made my dream a reality, my book is done. I'm scared of dying before I write it but I'm afraid of writing it too early. This thread hit me hard.
 
I've always dreamed of writing a book - I even have the outline for a plot ready. I just haven't got into it for this exact same reason - I'm scared of what comes after. I've made my dream a reality, my book is done. I'm scared of dying before I write it but I'm afraid of writing it too early. This thread hit me hard.
all I can say is: finish it. even if 1 incel reads it and it affects them, I think it's worth it. before I got registered, fontaine's posts really hit me in the feels and I felt like I somehow related to someone for the first time in a long while. I think that's what gives life meaning. Mutual understanding and being heard.
 
all I can say is: finish it. even if 1 incel reads it and it affects them, I think it's worth it. before I got registered, fontaine's posts really hit me in the feels and I felt like I somehow related to someone for the first time in a long while. I think that's what gives life meaning. Mutual understanding and being heard.
I will, someday. I plan on starting to write it after university. I feel like I have to actually live a little before starting to write about life.
 
I will, someday. I plan on starting to write it after university. I feel like I have to actually live a little before starting to write about life.
DO IT MY MAN. Even if it means having a lil' notebook next to your bed and writing thoughts that pop in your head. It adds up.
 
there's no way to detach yourself when that much work is involved, especially the final stages where you have to polish, test and make your product hardware compatible and audience accessible which is awful and no fun at all, and explicitly serves the audience.

like mylifeistrash's plastic trophy comparison...imagine going through the whole shebang then another 4-5 months just of debugging, testing and packaging and paperwork. and your only reward is some less cash than you put in or could have made, some retweets and some text from a guy with a furry avatar saying "YOU CHANGED MY LIFE DUDE!"

the real reward is alienating the few friends / family you have left and being let down by your huge expecations

although in economic terms, there was no demand for a game like this and there's no demand for a powerlifter going for a plastic trophy

there is a huge demands for chads, though
The faggiest dudes I can think of are the Fez dev and the Night in the Woods dev. Their twitter leaks soy from the computer monitor.
I've become so nihilistic. The only game devs I respect are full-on misanthropic NEETS like notch and terry davis. We need a ted kaczynski of vidya to make america great again.

I'd say they're typical artists who can't take criticism. When you put all your effort and energy into something, you can't accept that maybe it's trash or at least not that great.
 
Aspergatron
A guy (but much less frequently, a girl) that has Asperger's Syndrome and has no clue as to how to be socially aware.

What's worse, an Aspergatron does NOT want to improve their social capabilities, simply thinking that it's somehow impossible to be both intelligent and social (false dichotomy, yay!).

Their aspergatronic circuitry doesn't seem to allow them the capacity to be a more well-rounded human being, and thus they get stuck in an infinite loop whereby they think that all that's required for success in life is raw intellect, thereby showing that they're not as intelligent as they thought they were and thus failing at life (and thus withdrawing further into obscure hobbies).
Linux Help Forum:

Regular IT guy: "Hey guys, would you happen to know how to do the following with the 'cut' command"?

Aspergatron: said in aspergatronic robot voice "CUT IS NOT EFFICIENT!"

Regular IT guy: "Oh wow, that's really not what I asked for..."

by LemurGuy January 14, 2013
 
The faggiest dudes I can think of are the Fez dev and the Night in the Woods dev. Their twitter leaks soy from the computer monitor.
I've become so nihilistic. The only game devs I respect are full-on misanthropic NEETS like notch and terry davis. We need a ted kaczynski of vidya to make america great again.

Wow, I totally forgot about those guys from the early 2010s and their dumb ass movie https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indie_Game:_The_Movie
Feels like an eternity ago, that was another expose where you had men saying they'd kill themselves if their giant personal mission didn't work out.


the real reward is alienating the few friends / family you have left and being let down by your huge expecations

although in economic terms, there was no demand for a game like this and there's no demand for a powerlifter going for a plastic trophy

there is a huge demands for chads, though


I'd say they're typical artists who can't take criticism. When you put all your effort and energy into something, you can't accept that maybe it's trash or at least not that great.
True, it becomes even harder to relate to others if you're engaged in something like this.
I'd like to get to the root of what makes people so desperately hopeful, it's necessary both to work long hours on something in the first place but also necessary to cope as a low status male, with the "I have my special mission that I need to complete, and everything will be alright" line of thinking. Wouldn't be a bad thing if the odds of success weren't atrocious.
 
Wow, I totally forgot about those guys from the early 2010s and their dumb ass movie https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indie_Game:_The_Movie
Feels like an eternity ago, that was another expose where you had men saying they'd kill themselves if their giant personal mission didn't work out.



True, it becomes even harder to relate to others if you're engaged in something like this.
I'd like to get to the root of what makes people so desperately hopeful, it's necessary both to work long hours on something in the first place but also necessary to cope as a low status male, with the "I have my special mission that I need to complete, and everything will be alright" line of thinking. Wouldn't be a bad thing if the odds of success weren't atrocious.

self-immolation as a sort of penance for not being born chad

"i must wash my original-sin with a stupid fucking project / hobby that the market does not want "

even minecraft had a prototype that notch used to test the waters before he sunk time into it
 
Nothing new. society use ugly males as slave
 
Us incels truly are smarter than these men, a true genius male would know the only path is to lay down and rot until death.

Yep, to hope is to cope. Nothing an incel can do will help us unless it's surgery, but even then it's a stretch.
 

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