Venting The invisible undead

[xXnobodyXx]

I'm a 22 years old boy, I live in Brazil, I work at a pharmacy, most of the money I get is used for my subsistence, I have one day off per week, I use the nights of the days off to read and write.

I have asperger(diagnosed), I'm on two different antidepressants so I don't feel life, the idea of going out and getting drunk like my coworkers does not appel me, mabe I could get a Kiss or two from some dicksucker, but I could never escalate beyond that, firstly because I don't have a car to get me and the girl to a motel, secondly because most girls can "smell" that I'm a weirdo after 4 minutes of talk(I do that blank expression autists and psychopaths have sometimes).

I have no emotional bonds, no friends;

I was kinda apathetic since I was a child but now as an autistic adult and consumer of meds I feel even less, I'm an automaton with no hopes of getting better, the reason I live is because I feel a strong moral obligation to not cause the pain of losing a child into my parents and also to help them go through life till the end of their days, besides them I feel no real emotional connection, if anybody dies, fuck it, couldn't care less, I'm the perfect man that society needs, a cog in the self destruction machine.

 

[Snhook]

Even escort won’t fuck you?

 

[xXnobodyXx]

Even escort won’t fuck you?

I don't feel fully satisfied knowing she is disgusted by me while doing it.