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The day I realized I was just like them......

kjd

kjd

My last shot at life, fingers crossed...
★★★
Joined
Mar 2, 2022
Posts
254
A few years ago I used to consider myself a truly non-shallow and accepting individual. I used to believe that I would more than happily date just about any girl, regardless of her appearance, provided that our personalities and values matched. Boy how wrong I was. I used to browse google images, searching for “Ugly women” and I would stare at their faces and convince myself “Yes, I would date her”. My theory was that as long as I catch feeling for her personality, then I would naturally fall in love with her unique beauty, no matter how far off the standard it could possibly be. Because of this I would basically swipe right on pretty much any woman on dating apps (except for the ones who put their Instagram on their bio, go fish for followers somewhere else whore). The fact that I’m posting here should tell you that did work at all. But anyways, I was still blackpilled back then so I was aware of the importance of looks in order to attract women, but I thought looks were not important in order for women to attract me. I thought I was different and even morally superior, because unlike those shallow whores who only want Chad, I care about personality. At least that’s what I used to think.

Anyways, one day while thinking back about high school memories I remembered there was this one time a super pretty girl came to me and asked me if I could help her with her math assignment. I was well known as “the math guy” in school so when people needed help they would come to me a lot. When this girl asked me for help, my heart skipped a beat, I felt some butterflies in my stomach just because of how excited I was. I was gonna be able to spend some time with this pretty girl, I thought. Flashforward some other time and I’m basically in the same situation, being asked for help by a girl, however this one was not pretty at all, in fact she was one of the girls boys would usually say mean stuff about, like “Yeah I would only fuck her if she puts a bag on her head” and whatnot. As you can imagine I didn’t get any butterflies, and instead my brain actively looked for excuses to make in order to refuse helping her. In the end I just made some bullshit excuse up and said I was too busy.

After refreshing those memories, I realized, if I’m truly a guy who doesn’t care about looks, then why did I react so differently when the ugly girl asked me for help compared to when the pretty one asked? And I came to the conclusion it was all bullshit and cope. I was coping by telling myself I was superior to normies when in reality I was the same. Truth is, it is human nature to care about looks, our brain are literally wired to help and desire people who are pretty, and no amount of googling pictures of ugly chicks and looking at their faces intensely until I no longer feel repulse by them (an exposure therapy of sorts) can compare to the great excitement that being with a pretty girl brings. Sure you can train yourself to tolerate an ugly face, but that will never bring you the joy that waking up next to a pretty one would.

So I guess all of this backstory was just for me to say: Yes, I am an ugly male who wants to date a pretty female. I do not want to settle for an ugly one, I'd rather die single. If an ugly girl ever expresses desire for me, I would only use her for sex and never show her to my family, because I would be ashamed to do so. If the ugly girl ever tries to be more than a fwb, I would ghost her. I know it may sound hypocritical to complain so much about the role of looks and how unfair it is, but then be just as shallow as everyone else, but to be honest, I don’t hate the game anymore, I don’t hate the fact that the game is unfair, what I hate is that I was given a handicapped player.

Of course there is still a massive gap between the female standards of Chad only and my standards, which are a lot more flexible. Also, unlike females, I am more than willing to have sex with ugly girls, it’s always good to have some practice after all, so is not like I am a standardcel. But at the end of the day is also important to recognize in ourselves that shallowness is not female exclusive and a lot of us are shallow as well. Not our fault tho, just how our brains are programmed.​
 
Who would read this shit:feelskek:
 
"im gonna fall in love with her personality" :bluepill::bluepill::bluepill::bluepill::bluepill::feelshaha::feelshaha::feelshaha::feelshaha::feelshaha::feelshaha:
 
I’m average looking so I deserve an average looking femoid because average looking femoid is my looks match.
 
didn't read a single word
 
I’m average looking so I deserve an average looking femoid because average looking femoid is my looks match.
I would have sex with my looks match, however I would not settle for her. I'm 3/10 but I would only settle for 6/10 +
 
Your thread and post made total sense. It also offered me some self-reflection. Nice quality post.
 

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