Venting The agepill makes me very depressed and the older I get the more envious I become

[TheGrayWolf]

Ok if I were 23 or even 25 I could somehow cope a bit better, marginally but still. But at 27... shit makes me depressed. And I'm only 5'4".

I'm watching Stranger Things, and in Season 1 there's this actress Nancy Dyers (looks much better in the actual show than on pictures/screenshots, so strange) who was 20 in 2015 when this season was filmed and who in season 2 becomes the gf of one of the main actors and this made me feel strong envy. IRL I just read they're a fucking couple.

My point? I felt real envy seeing them in the show there was real chemistry there, and fundamentally I'm jealous that they have a relationship.

I'm always envious when I see an attractive couple and seeing what I missed and will never have is fucking brutal. Where's my pretty, cute voice, kind, funny gf!? But yeah, it's over. I won't work full-time in the future. That will be my cope. I can't not work, can't afford that.

 

[Skoga]

I gave up at life with 18, the moment you become truly blackpilled your age doesnt matter anymore. I feel the same at 25 now as I did at 18

 

[TheGrayWolf]

I gave up at life with 18, the moment you become truly blackpilled your age doesnt matter anymore. I feel the same at 25 now as I did at 18

I did too but somehow - without any logical reason - I was more coping then because I WANTED to believe I will get a gf, now I see that I just believed it will magically happen. I never tried getting a gf because I knew I was too ugly. It's just CLEARER now for me personally bc I now can't cope in my head anymore or lie to myself. I subconsciously knew it was over back then but like I said I lied to myself to cope, now I can't do that anymore because of the FACTS, I'm ugly af and only 5'4, and my age.

 

[Skoga]

I did too but somehow - without any logical reason - I was more coping then because I WANTED to believe I will get a gf, now I see that I just believed it will magically happen. I never tried getting a gf because I knew I was too ugly. It's just CLEARER now for me personally bc I now can't cope in my head anymore or lie to myself. I subconsciously knew it was over back then but like I said I lied to myself to cope, now I can't do that anymore because of the FACTS, I'm ugly af and only 5'4, and my age.

I was delusional / unaware of my ugliness / inceldom before 18 because my highschool consisted of only guys and dating was never a topic, I was in a nerd friendgroup and girls were never a topic. When I got out of hs and started college, reality hit me like a fucking truck and I couldnt cope with it. Its like a switch flipped in my head so I began informing myself about ugly / lonely men and found out about incels and the blackpill. Thats when I found out it was over for me and there's no hope. After 7 years I finally "accepted" that I am unloveable because of my inferior genetics. I never tried either, never approached, I just gave up from the start and I don't regret it. There's nothing in my life that I regret. It was rigged from the start. I'm also 5'4, ugly, balding, disabled and have alot of other flaws that make me inferior to other men.

 

[Emba]

My condolences

 

[TheGrayWolf]

My condolences

Thanks I guess

Are you actually over 60?

 

[Emba]

Thanks I guess

Are you actually over 60?

Yes

 

[TheGrayWolf]

Yes