Serious Seppukucel

[Henry de Montherlant]

Question for youngcels here (<30)

Do you plan to commit suicide to preserve your own dignity at a certain time in your life if you consider you didn't reach your life ideal ?

Please explain how, what, why you would or wouldn't do so.

 

[acnescarcel]

I've felt that. should i die now (23) so people that knew me will remember me as young and troubled rather than old and a loser. i would be willing in some ways but its a big decision to end your life. I've been thinking about it since childhood. I've been thinking about it seriously since about 18. theres always the thought that what if it gets better? from 18 I've been hoping for it to get better, but honestly its gotten nothing but worse. like i said its hard to make the decision to kill yourself. especially when you have good parents. sometimes i think i should become a criminal and let the cops shoot me to death. at least ill have some fun before i die. sometimes i think i should buy a tank of nitrogen and a scuba diver facemask go to the local park at night and inhale until i die. I'm sort of at a loss at what to do with my life at the moment, but its not looking good.

 

[Deleted member 3291]

b4 30 yes

 

[Henry de Montherlant]

I've felt that. should i die now (23) so people that knew me will remember me as young and troubled rather than old and a loser. i would be willing in some ways but its a big decision to end your life. I've been thinking about it since childhood. I've been thinking about it seriously since about 18. theres always the thought that what if it gets better? from 18 I've been hoping for it to get better, but honestly its gotten nothing but worse. like i said its hard to make the decision to kill yourself. especially when you have good parents. sometimes i think i should become a criminal and let the cops shoot me to death. at least ill have some fun before i die. sometimes i think i should buy a tank of nitrogen and a scuba diver facemask go to the local park at night and inhale until i die. I'm sort of at a loss at what to do with my life at the moment, but its not looking good.

Yes it's a big decision. I had in my mind the example of Yukio Mishima, who spent all his life to prepare a revolution in his country, but failed in the very last moment, and so decided to commit seppuku. Personnally I'm still undecided, although having suicidal thoughts since my childhood. I don't really have "big projects" that I could eventually try to achieve for the world or myself, so I don't even have a noble reason to end my life in the eventuality of losing it. What about you ?

(To all retards who are already typing their ER/Jihad/whatever jokes : this is a serious thread. ER is a stupid way of dying, it hasn't the spiritual depth Mishima reached when he ended his (and only his) life, so beat it.)

 

[acnescarcel]

Yes it's a big decision. I had in my mind the example of Yukio Mishima, who spent all his life to prepare a revolution in his country, but failed in the very last moment, and so decided to commit seppuku. Personnally I'm still undecided, although having suicidal thoughts since my childhood. I don't really have "big projects" that I could eventually try to achieve for the world or myself, so I don't even have a noble reason to end my life in the eventuality of losing it. What about you ?

(To all retards who are already typing their ER/Jihad/whatever jokes : this is a serious thread. ER is a stupid way of dying, it hasn't the spiritual depth Mishima reached when he ended his (and only his) life, so beat it.)

i have no plans to go ER. i have no noble reasoning to kill myself. the best i could do over blatant suicide is get a cop to kill me for robbing a store or selling drugs or something, but even thats a cope. more than likely if i did do it it would be alone in a park at night with a nitrogen mask. i would be down to die in an incel army, but thats never happening.

 

[Deleted member 6501]

most people here will ascend from the blackpill lifestyle or won't an hero at all, I legitimately have no future so I'll have to do it soon

 

[Stop Time]

i'm 26 atm. If shit continues till 33 i will see.

 

[Henry de Montherlant]

i have no plans to go ER. i have no noble reasoning to kill myself. the best i could do over blatant suicide is get a cop to kill me for robbing a store or selling drugs or something, but even thats a cope. more than likely if i did do it it would be alone in a park at night with a nitrogen mask. i would be down to die in an incel army, but thats never happening.

most people here will ascend from the blackpill lifestyle or won't an hero at all, I legitimately have no future so I'll have to do it soon

i'm 26 atm. If shit continues till 33 i will see.

Don't you believe a meaningless death is even worse than a meaningless life though ? Have you ever considered the army ? Personnally, it's one of my options if I fail all the things I'm doing currently (mainly petty projects regarding my own status), although I still don't even have the gut to enlist. (btw I'm not a recruitment consultant lol)

 

[Fontaine]

No. Killing yourself to leave a "good image" is a losing proposition. It's greatly overestimating your current good image - - hence the delusional component of narcissistic suicide - -, and how much society cares about suicides. You won't even leave a footnote in history, unless you went ER or did something truly spectacular; at the most you'll be a number in government statistics. The only likely impact will be on your immediate family. Seems like a very shitty and egoistic way to go.

I understand the appeal of this mindset, especially from an atheistic perspective, but it's delusional.

 

[Henry de Montherlant]

No. Killing yourself to leave a "good image" is a losing proposition. It's greatly overestimating your current good image - - hence the delusional component of narcissistic suicide - -, and how much society cares about suicides. You won't even leave a footnote in history, unless you went ER or did something truly spectacular; at the most you'll be a number in government statistics. The only likely impact will be on your immediate family. Seems like a very shitty and egoistic way to go.

I understand the appeal of this mindset, especially from an atheistic perspective, but it's delusional.

I absolutely don't care about the image though. Others can judge, positively or negatively, my death is not their business and their judgements are not my business. What I care about is my own relation with my own death. My personnal experiment of my very last instant, to feel the feeling that my death was a good death.

There might be an artistic perspective here, since artists might be more prone to this kind of thoughts, but I don't mean I necessarily want a "spectacular" death. I mean a death that has a meaning, a real "ending" to my life, according to myself, and only myself.

 

[Juxtaposition6]

No i don't, i never will.

 

[Ritalincel]

No i don't, i never will.

 

[acnescarcel]

No. Killing yourself to leave a "good image" is a losing proposition. It's greatly overestimating your current good image - - hence the delusional component of narcissistic suicide - -, and how much society cares about suicides. You won't even leave a footnote in history, unless you went ER or did something truly spectacular; at the most you'll be a number in government statistics. The only likely impact will be on your immediate family. Seems like a very shitty and egoistic way to go.

I understand the appeal of this mindset, especially from an atheistic perspective, but it's delusional.

i agree that my i might overestimate my current good image, but i just meant with family and friends. i didn't mean in the eyes of the world or that anyone besides people that have met me would care in anyway.