Im almost 24 now , KHHV .
Friendless , talentless , lifeless loser .
I feel like i am still a child .
Like i havent grown up yet cause
i missed all those developmental milestones that
can onyl be achieved through experience , social contact , friends , foids .
Trial and Error as part of a natural adolescence .
I am a fucking 24 year old child .
i drive around with a fucking rusty bike
while wearing a backpack like a 10 year old boy going to school
i wear clothes that i already wore with 14 cause i didnt grow since then
Meanwhile people i went to school with are already married and having their second child .
Feels like im a relict , like i was destined to kill myself a long time ago
but i was too pussy to do it so i just barely get by .
Without goals , without social contact ,
without anything that makes me truly happy or makes me feel proud or confident .
Only short term gratification which leads to more suffering later on .
I destroy everything i touch .
I cant concentrate on anything more than 30 seconds .
Since i was born i have only brought misery into this world .
I am like the cancer of civilization ,
a parasite who only consumes, but never produces anything on his own except trash .
Spoiled by first world luxury ,
wasting every oppportunity and wallowing in self pity .
A truly bad person .
Not only lookswise , but also personalitywise .
I am one of those people who wouldve been long dead if it wasnt for modern society
and its vow to keep everyone alive ,
no matter how weak or handicapped .
If you are born too early or too weak to survive naturally ,
youll still get saved .
I truly hate myself and the fact that i exist .
I shouldnt have been born .
Friendless , talentless , lifeless loser .
I feel like i am still a child .
Like i havent grown up yet cause
i missed all those developmental milestones that
can onyl be achieved through experience , social contact , friends , foids .
Trial and Error as part of a natural adolescence .
I am a fucking 24 year old child .
i drive around with a fucking rusty bike
while wearing a backpack like a 10 year old boy going to school
i wear clothes that i already wore with 14 cause i didnt grow since then
Meanwhile people i went to school with are already married and having their second child .
Feels like im a relict , like i was destined to kill myself a long time ago
but i was too pussy to do it so i just barely get by .
Without goals , without social contact ,
without anything that makes me truly happy or makes me feel proud or confident .
Only short term gratification which leads to more suffering later on .
I destroy everything i touch .
I cant concentrate on anything more than 30 seconds .
Since i was born i have only brought misery into this world .
I am like the cancer of civilization ,
a parasite who only consumes, but never produces anything on his own except trash .
Spoiled by first world luxury ,
wasting every oppportunity and wallowing in self pity .
A truly bad person .
Not only lookswise , but also personalitywise .
I am one of those people who wouldve been long dead if it wasnt for modern society
and its vow to keep everyone alive ,
no matter how weak or handicapped .
If you are born too early or too weak to survive naturally ,
youll still get saved .
I truly hate myself and the fact that i exist .
I shouldnt have been born .
