Does anyone else get that never-ending, chronic sense of Paranoia? Where you feel like every human being is out for you and actively seeking to harm you in some manner?
I have never in my life had it until recently. It has only progressively gotten worse since the beginning of this year. I am more than confident that other people are actively trying to severely injure if not outright kill me—and they're all completely random people who I have done nothing to.
Just today, I was practicing my driving and suddenly some guy in a truck unironically seemed to be tailing me for no reason. I am more than confident that he was following me, he was turning the exact same corners and his turns made no sense. I turned left like three times just to see if he would follow, and he did. He didn't disengage until way later.
It has gotten to the point where I am actively certain that Fate is an actual being I have been cursing this entire time—or something else of the like—and it is trying to have me killed.
The treatment I receive from others has only reinvigorated my belief that I am not a human being.
I know that this world is cruel, and humans equally so. Nobody will ever be there for me if I need it—I have to be ready to defend myself if someone or something tries to attack me.
And no, for any glowies viewing this post, I do not mean that I am going to attack anyone myself or deem 'mistreatment' as an attack. I mean literal physical assault that threatens my life. I know it's coming, I have to do something to prepare for it. I have thought of getting Mace or something because I can't legally conceal carry.
I have never in my life had it until recently. It has only progressively gotten worse since the beginning of this year. I am more than confident that other people are actively trying to severely injure if not outright kill me—and they're all completely random people who I have done nothing to.
Just today, I was practicing my driving and suddenly some guy in a truck unironically seemed to be tailing me for no reason. I am more than confident that he was following me, he was turning the exact same corners and his turns made no sense. I turned left like three times just to see if he would follow, and he did. He didn't disengage until way later.
It has gotten to the point where I am actively certain that Fate is an actual being I have been cursing this entire time—or something else of the like—and it is trying to have me killed.
The treatment I receive from others has only reinvigorated my belief that I am not a human being.
I know that this world is cruel, and humans equally so. Nobody will ever be there for me if I need it—I have to be ready to defend myself if someone or something tries to attack me.
And no, for any glowies viewing this post, I do not mean that I am going to attack anyone myself or deem 'mistreatment' as an attack. I mean literal physical assault that threatens my life. I know it's coming, I have to do something to prepare for it. I have thought of getting Mace or something because I can't legally conceal carry.
