I found this entry on IT, and my quick answers to her points. My answers need to be short, as I have work soon, but might add more later.
TL;DR - IT and many normies in general just do not fucking get it
View: https://www.reddit.com/r/IncelTear/comments/vmcoou/my_advice_to_the_incel_movement_from_a_womans/
Stop The Hate. It is clear to me that not only do you hate others...you also hate yourself. This all comes from a toxic "ideology" which holds women in contempt, as second class citizens in a patriarchal worldview and seems to put physical appearance above everything else. Once you learn to accept YOURSELF...warts and all, flaws and all, they you can begin to accept others. Give respect and you will get respect.
I am aware that I hate myself. I have also given a lot of respect but to no avail. You know what I have been voted for one time in school? the sweetest guy; so no, I don't have a history of being hateful, in fact, I have a history of being considerate and have been fucked over for it. In my case, I absolutely do not hate women ---- I just don't have much respect for them, due to various life experiences starting from childhood (not just "a few rejections"). A lot of women can go around straight out admitting to hating men and no one bats an eye.
Mental health resources- therapy, appropriate medication administered by a medical professional, making real world connections and building a supportive social network, an action plan for overcoming depression, extreme negativity, violent fantasies and in some cases (many cases?)...institutionalized in a mental care facility until they are ready to rejoin civilized society.
I have tried therapy, four times, and it has done little. My shitty insurance only covers a few therapists unfortunately, and those on my plan are not very good. Also, I'm very likely high functioning autistic, but I can't afford the fucking testing. I also have had very adverse reaction to medication, making me feel worse. And now you're telling me some of us need to be institutionalized? FUCK OFF. Despite my bitter outlook in life, I am a functional member of society, don't come here telling people they need to be institutionalized.
Accepting Hard Truths the Right Way - YES looks matter! I won't deny that we live in a superficial society that has MUCH to be desired! But you know what? That's not the ONLY thing that matters: kindness, personality and a sense of humor go a LONG way in both friendships and relationships with both men and women. Look outside and see how many less than perfect looking people have relationships and have found someone. If they can do it..so can you.
The incel "community" as you want to call it, is probably one of the few where hard truths are accepted. I'm glad you admit looks matter, but kindness has done nothing for me but get taken advantage of.
Self Improvement Plan - which leads to #4. Being that we live in a superficial society where looks matter and I would argue more than they should it's time to take steps to IMPROVE your looks by hitting the gym, eating right, dressing in fashionable clothes and having a positive mindset. If looks really do matter then it's time to stop complaining and start DOING something about it.
I complain precisely because I have tried your advice. I'm a "gymcel", avoid eating crap, and dress decently --- I can't do anything for my weird facial features or height. I'm happy with the physical progress though
Respecting everyone as human beings..including women! This might be the hardest part for many incels or so it would seem. You have internalized your own self hatred and projected that on to others. I am not going to pretend that getting rejected is easy...but you have to learn to accept challenges in life NOT in a toxic, extremely negative way but as a way to learn and grow. Specific example? You were "rejected" by a girl you had feelings for..but you know what? It's HER loss and your gain! Why? Because now you can move on and find someone new that you deserve that will share those feelings you have in return. It's an opportunity for exploration and growth...THAT'S the kind of mindset you need to have moving forward on this journey.
It's hard for me to respect women if many of them call us 'wallets', maliciously empty their husbands finances after divorce, reject men for things that they cannot control (like height), and, in my case, from middle school to adulthood, have overall treated me like crap for being blessed with the double whammy of odd personality and ugly.
TL;DR - IT and many normies in general just do not fucking get it
View: https://www.reddit.com/r/IncelTear/comments/vmcoou/my_advice_to_the_incel_movement_from_a_womans/
Stop The Hate. It is clear to me that not only do you hate others...you also hate yourself. This all comes from a toxic "ideology" which holds women in contempt, as second class citizens in a patriarchal worldview and seems to put physical appearance above everything else. Once you learn to accept YOURSELF...warts and all, flaws and all, they you can begin to accept others. Give respect and you will get respect.
I am aware that I hate myself. I have also given a lot of respect but to no avail. You know what I have been voted for one time in school? the sweetest guy; so no, I don't have a history of being hateful, in fact, I have a history of being considerate and have been fucked over for it. In my case, I absolutely do not hate women ---- I just don't have much respect for them, due to various life experiences starting from childhood (not just "a few rejections"). A lot of women can go around straight out admitting to hating men and no one bats an eye.
Mental health resources- therapy, appropriate medication administered by a medical professional, making real world connections and building a supportive social network, an action plan for overcoming depression, extreme negativity, violent fantasies and in some cases (many cases?)...institutionalized in a mental care facility until they are ready to rejoin civilized society.
I have tried therapy, four times, and it has done little. My shitty insurance only covers a few therapists unfortunately, and those on my plan are not very good. Also, I'm very likely high functioning autistic, but I can't afford the fucking testing. I also have had very adverse reaction to medication, making me feel worse. And now you're telling me some of us need to be institutionalized? FUCK OFF. Despite my bitter outlook in life, I am a functional member of society, don't come here telling people they need to be institutionalized.
Accepting Hard Truths the Right Way - YES looks matter! I won't deny that we live in a superficial society that has MUCH to be desired! But you know what? That's not the ONLY thing that matters: kindness, personality and a sense of humor go a LONG way in both friendships and relationships with both men and women. Look outside and see how many less than perfect looking people have relationships and have found someone. If they can do it..so can you.
The incel "community" as you want to call it, is probably one of the few where hard truths are accepted. I'm glad you admit looks matter, but kindness has done nothing for me but get taken advantage of.
Self Improvement Plan - which leads to #4. Being that we live in a superficial society where looks matter and I would argue more than they should it's time to take steps to IMPROVE your looks by hitting the gym, eating right, dressing in fashionable clothes and having a positive mindset. If looks really do matter then it's time to stop complaining and start DOING something about it.
I complain precisely because I have tried your advice. I'm a "gymcel", avoid eating crap, and dress decently --- I can't do anything for my weird facial features or height. I'm happy with the physical progress though
Respecting everyone as human beings..including women! This might be the hardest part for many incels or so it would seem. You have internalized your own self hatred and projected that on to others. I am not going to pretend that getting rejected is easy...but you have to learn to accept challenges in life NOT in a toxic, extremely negative way but as a way to learn and grow. Specific example? You were "rejected" by a girl you had feelings for..but you know what? It's HER loss and your gain! Why? Because now you can move on and find someone new that you deserve that will share those feelings you have in return. It's an opportunity for exploration and growth...THAT'S the kind of mindset you need to have moving forward on this journey.
It's hard for me to respect women if many of them call us 'wallets', maliciously empty their husbands finances after divorce, reject men for things that they cannot control (like height), and, in my case, from middle school to adulthood, have overall treated me like crap for being blessed with the double whammy of odd personality and ugly.
Last edited:
