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LifeFuel My oneitis touched me once

Fatimacel

Fatimacel

Retarded Sperg
-
Joined
May 3, 2025
Posts
945
Back when I was in highschool I had a oneitis named Fatima, some of you may already know that because it's where the 'Fatima' part of the name 'Fatimacel' comes from to clarify, maybe some of you thought my username was 'Fat I'm A Cel' :feelskek:

Of course I've been told it's very cucked but I was originally going to name myself Oneitiscel but that was already taken by @Oneitiscel so instead I decided to be more literal and just name myself after my oneitis directly.

Anyway moving forwards, there isn't really much to tell so I'll just give you all some background on the foid I consider my oneitis. She had or more accurately has green eyes, dark brown hair, pale skin tone, pointy straight nose and I guess I'd say she had very sharp features and a feminine face overall, cold and uninviting though. When she would smile or laugh it'd be the complete opposite though, she looked really cute and gentle when smiling. Her body was very thin but she dressed very modestly, usually in a hoodie so it was hard to tell about her other features. There were a few times I saw her in a normal shirt however and I could see that her tits were maybe medium sized. She never wore any tight pants so it was hard for me to get a good deduction about her ass, I concluded that it was small but well-shaped based on the few good glimpses I got.

She was a once in a lifetime beauty, a rare gem in a sea of coal, beckies and landwhales, the usual inhabitants of this hell we call New York. I have a feeling that if the people who call me cucked caught a glimpse of her, they'd understand my longing and desire for her that has held firm for so many years.

And the best part, she was a virgin. Hell, there's a good chance she still might be. After stalking all of her socials I've never seen a picture of her with a man. And back in highschool she was never in a relationship, in fact she was one of those foids who was "focused on muh career and studies :foidSoy:" usually I'd think a foid would be lying if she said this to me but I believed it from her for one very simple reason. All the guys in my school were ugly, and I believe the Juggernaut law was in full force here. She was too much of a gigastacy, all the deathnics at my HS realized they had no chance in hell with her. Even when I would follow her after school I wouldn't see her with any boys, occasionally I'd see her with her foid friends though. Perhaps she was a lesbian all along... Never thought of that possibility before but at least I don't get cucked that way. Of course there were guys orbiting her at school but they were all in the friendzone because they were all pretty ugly and one of them was a gay black nigga lol. On top of the fact she was a Muslim, she didn't wear a hijab or anything but she probably feared her family and perhaps Allah enough that she didn't try to find a chad to deflower her.

At first, her being way out of my league deterred me from developing any feelings for her, I knew it would only lead to pain. But that all changed when I learned something seemingly insignificant. I learned that she was a Pakistani and a Pashtun just like me, I had assumed prior to this that she was maybe Turkish, Arab or maybe just white. Learning that she was the same flavor of subhuman as me, cut from the same cloth gave me a bit of hope that maybe there was a chance even for a sub 5 ogre like me.

Despite my intense feelings for her, I could never bring myself to talk to her. Even back then when I wasn't blackpilled, I knew that it was over. It was easier to just fantasize about brutally raping her, making her virgin pussy bleed while she struggled and moaned begging me to stop while holding back her pleasure. :ahegao:

Obviously I had more socially acceptable fantasies about us spending our life together happily, creating a version of her that never really existed and will never exist because all women are the same. The former is more realistic than the latter though, and I considered actually going through with it many times. I had nothing to lose after all, and I could take everything from her.

But as you all can see, I'm still here, rotting. While she lives the rest of her days in blissful ignorance, never realizing how close she came to being despoiled by a sub 5 and filled with my kids.

I believe I mentioned this earlier but I never really talked to her, we talked face to face once when we were forced to do a project together in a group and she was trying to get my input on something. I didn't really answer though, I stayed quiet and iirc I just told her "Go with whatever" I didn't care, I was content to just do my work in silence and it made me very uneasy to converse with her. That reminds me, whenever we would make eye contact (usually when I was trying to sneak in a look of her face) I would immediately feel deeply unsettled and guilty. Like I said before, her neutral expression was very cold and uninviting, almost like she was judging everyone. In every crystalline speck of her emerald eyes I could feel her raw hatred, disgust and maybe fear for me. She also always had this slight look of sadness which made it even worse. It felt like she was looking into into my very soul, judging every intimate fantasy I had about her. An eerie experience that can't really be accurately described. If I had ever raped her, I definitely would have cut out her eyes first. Kind of like that one Edgar Allen Poe story where the narrator kills an old man because he doesn't like his eyes. Except I did like her eyes... The problem was her gaze itself.

I think that's enough background information for now, maybe way too much to be honest but I needed to get all of this off my chest somehow. Moving on to the actual story which is so quick it doesn't really justify all the foreplay and exposition dumping before it.

After a long day of school we were finally dismissed and I started walking out of the classroom, I'm pretty sure I was deep in thought thinking about video games probably. As I got to the doorway, it happened, she touched my shoulder. I was zoned out but her touching me with her hands completely zoned me back in. I assume she was reaching for one of her friends for whatever reason but she accidentally planted her hand on my shoulder. I turned away and held back my smile. That single touch completely made my day. There was still one class left and I dealt with it and went home, fantasizing about her all the while.

When I finally got home I didn't really know how to commemorate this momentous occasion, but it did become clear to me eventually. My retarded logic was that if she touched my jacket (which was over my shoulder at the time) with the same hands that she used to finger her tight virgin pussy, and if I rubbed my cock over that spot on my jacket and humped it a bit before masturbating, it'd be kind of like having sex and losing my virginity to her. So that's what I did, for hours I held back my cum but when it finally came out it was maybe the best bust of my life, probably enhanced by how horny I was after the touch. And I thought about fucking her the whole time.

Anyways even after I moved out of my parent's place and basically became estranged, I kept that jacket as a momento. Never did anything degenerate with it again, that was a one time only thing but it represents the most affection I ever got from a foid jfl.

I'm not really sure how to end this, it was a long spergout schizopost that I'm not really expecting anyone to fully read. I just needed to let all this out after keeping it bottled up for like half a decade. This is the one place that I was sure wouldn't completely judge me. I'm sure some will say it's foid worship and cucked but let me tell you this: I hate my oneitis just as much as I hate every other foid. The truth is that I liked her face and body and never the shallow whore behind it.

There are a lot of fakecels in this world who'll pretend to be your brocels and then stab you in the back at the first sign of affection by a 3/10 used up roastie. I swear to all of you on everything I hold dear that even if I was offered by the Devil a lifelong stable happy relationship with my oneitis, my virgin pakistani princess, where she'd never cheat or look at another man at the cost of one of my brocel's lives, I wouldn't take the deal. I'd rather kill that perfect version of her if it meant sparing one of you. Even one of the fuckers on here who openly hate on me. The life of a brocel is worth more than a shallow transactional relationship with a foid will ever be worth. I'd go as far as to say that one brocel life is worth a billion foid lives. And I think that's a good note to end it on, bros before hoes, even if she's your one true love. Foid love is one hell of a drug, and an addicting one at that which will give you severe tunnel vision. But always remember that even if you lose everything else in this life, this forum will always be here for you and all of your brocels alongside it. I remember even when @Dr. Autismo went homeless he continued to post on here.

And to those who managed to stomach the whole schizo rant and make it here :feelsYall: sincerely, thank you
 
Writing all of this about a shoulder Touch Is how you know it’s over
 
With how much I hyped it up you were probably thinking I ascended LMAO
Yeah I did think that maybe you should try to reach out to her
 
Yeah I did think that maybe you should try to reach out to her
Idk what I would even say "Hey I'm that lonely quiet kid who went to highschool with you, can't believe I found you online!" (I've been stalking you for 7 years)
 
Idk what I would even say "Hey I'm that lonely quiet kid who went to highschool with you, can't believe I found you online!" (I've been stalking you for 7 years)
They don’t have high school reunions?
 
They don’t have high school reunions?
They do but I still don't know what I'd say to her or do. I had no friends in highschool, back then I was a lonely outcast, ten years later I'd still be a lonely outcast :feelsrope:
 
They do but I still don't know what I'd say to her or do. I had no friends in highschool, back then I was a lonely outcast, ten years later I'd still be a lonely outcast :feelsrope:
Brutal you might should just go anyway my dad said he got little to no women In high school but when he graduated and went to a reunion he had all kinds of women coming up saying they liked him in school

You gotta remember in school women are embarrassed to date someone unpopular but afterwards it doesn’t really matter
 
Brutal you might should just go anyway my dad said he got little to no women In high school but when he graduated and went to a reunion he had all kinds of women coming up saying they liked him in school

You gotta remember in school women are embarrassed to date someone unpopular but afterwards it doesn’t really matter
You think there's a chance one of them was into me? That'd be lifefuel but I doubt it, if I don't rope by then I might go.
 
You think there's a chance one of them was into me? That'd be lifefuel but I doubt it, if I don't rope by then I might go.
Might be but don’t get your hopes up
 
Might be but don’t get your hopes up
Thanks for the encouragement ig, but yeah it's wise to stay realistic, that's the main purpose of the blackpill after all

Also I just realized I'm fucked if she somehow finds this post :feelscry:
 
Thanks for the encouragement ig, but yeah it's wise to stay realistic, that's the main purpose of the blackpill after all

Also I just realized I'm fucked if she somehow finds this post :feelscry:
I seriously doubt she would find this plus this has happened to probably thousands of others
 
still over
Imagine the trajectory of my life if she actually gave me a chance, maybe if she had showed me even an ounce of real affection I wouldn't be here writing essays about her shoulder touch.

If I had experienced teen love with her and took her virginity I might have cured cancer jfl
 
Writing all of this about a shoulder Touch Is how you know it’s over
The dreaded shoulder touch, my oneitis did something similar but it was completely platonic, I just didn’t understand at the time. The fact that I am thinking about my oneitis touching my shoulder after 7 years while some women forgot who they fucked after a few months just shows you it’s over
 
Imagine the trajectory of my life if she actually gave me a chance, maybe if she had showed me even an ounce of real affection I wouldn't be here writing essays about her shoulder touch.

If I had experienced teen love with her and took her virginity I might have cured cancer jfl
Same with my oneitis. She only platonically was kind to me. She didn’t show anything truly romantic and she led me on until choosing her boyfriend who previously cheated on her over me.
 
The dreaded shoulder touch, my oneitis did something similar but it was completely platonic, I just didn’t understand at the time. The fact that I am thinking about my oneitis touching my shoulder after 7 years while some women forgot who they fucked after a few months just shows you it’s over
Mine did it on accident lol, she didn't even mean to touch me and I still think about it jfl
 
Mine did it on accident lol, she didn't even mean to touch me and I still think about it jfl
I still think about my leg touching a woman’s leg when being crammed on the bus.
 
Same with my oneitis. She only platonically was kind to me. She didn’t show anything truly romantic and she led me on until choosing her boyfriend who previously cheated on her over me.
Personality detector saw that he was the better man for her bro! :soy:
 
My condolences bro, living in that shithole city must be hell
Thanks, it's probably one of the most deranged places on the planet

You're from Italy right? That's pretty much hyperborea compared to Jew York
 
You're actually pretty good at writing, and I like the appearance description and the "it'd be kind of like having sex and losing my virginity to her" part
 
You're actually pretty good at writing, and I like the appearance description
Thanks brocel, it means a lot, really :feelsaww: :feelscomfy: I've always felt that I'm low IQ, retarded and unable to express myself well so it's good to hear that you enjoyed my story
and the "it'd be kind of like having sex and losing my virginity to her" part
It might seem funny and retarded but that was genuinely my coping deluded thought process when this happened to me :feelsrope:
 
Thanks brocel, it means a lot, really :feelsaww: :feelscomfy: I've always felt that I'm low IQ, retarded and unable to express myself well so it's good to hear that you enjoyed my story

It might seem funny and retarded but that was genuinely my coping deluded thought process when this happened to me :feelsrope:
Don't say that. Your logic is actually nice. You describe the process clearly and convey your feelings well. If you are retarded, most people around me have to go to McDonald's to be hamburgers. You describe your oneitis as, I don't know, beautiful? Not how she look, but how you feel
 
Wow, that was a good read. You have a knack for writing.

I could relate to this post. I've had a number of oneitises in my time, and I too have fantasized about a perfect life together (minus the rape part). It makes it hurt so much more when reality sinks in and you remember it'll never happen.

On a side note, normally I don't know how I'd feel about naming yourself after a 3D foid, but Fatimacel has a nice ring to it.
 
Wow, that was a good read. You have a knack for writing.
Thanks mang:feelsLightsaber:
I could relate to this post. I've had a number of oneitises in my time, and I too have fantasized about a perfect life together (minus the rape part). It makes it hurt so much more when reality sinks in and you remember it'll never happen.
Yeah I remember reading a few of your posts while I was still lurking without an account

There were a few occasions where you talked about your experiences with your oneitis' and I vividly remember resonating with what you shared. Things kind of come full circle in that way ig

And about the rape stuff, I don't know if I ever actually wanted to really hurt her I just wanted her to know I was there, that I existed and I cared for her enough that I'd be willing to go to that extreme length to be with her

While the fantasies about living a perfect life with her were my ideal outcome, I was proto-blackpilled and I realized it would never happen

So realistically the only way would be to force myself to on her, not as an act of lust or dominance but as an act of love

It's hard to justify those thoughts but I couldn't handle the pain of knowing that everything I spent so much time thinking about would never be real just as you said
On a side note, normally I don't know how I'd feel about naming yourself after a 3D foid, but Fatimacel has a nice ring to it.
Yeah I chose it kind of on an impulse but I don't regret it because it sounds nice and reminds me of her
 
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Not how she look, but how you feel
I kind of wonder how she'd react if she ever read this, disturbed by the rapey stuff most likely but maybe flattered overall

I doubt anyone will ever write so much about her ever again, even her future husband probably couldn't be arsed to write a few sentences lol
 
29 bluepillers holy shit... Hi IT
 
Mogs me. Never had an oneitis.
 
Damn dude. Relatable, for sure. I had a similar experience of failed teen love, it was fucking brutal. :feelscry:
 
Damn dude. Relatable, for sure. I had a similar experience of failed teen love, it was fucking brutal. :feelscry:
Can you recount some of your own story for us? You don't have to if it'd fuck up your mood but venting helped me loosen some of my own burden so it might be therapeutic for you too
 
if I was offered by the Devil a lifelong stable happy relationship with my oneitis, my virgin pakistani princess, where she'd never cheat or look at another man at the cost of one of my brocel's lives, I wouldn't take the deal.
Yea right bro :feelskek:
 
Can you recount some of your own story for us? You don't have to if it'd fuck up your mood but venting helped me loosen some of my own burden so it might be therapeutic for you too
Thank you for the invitation, it's comforting to know I'm among bros. I'm mostly at peace with my teen trauma, so it wouldn't really bother me to go over it. I might make my own post, to fully flesh out the story. It would probably be a good therapeutic exercise, as even now, she still haunts my mind.
 
Thank you for the invitation, it's comforting to know I'm among bros. I'm mostly at peace with my teen trauma, so it wouldn't really bother me to go over it. I might make my own post, to fully flesh out the story. It would probably be a good therapeutic exercise, as even now, she still haunts my mind.
Sounds good, I'll be on the lookout for it brocel
 
God I just remembered something else too, I remember I would look at her reflection on the screen of my school laptop every chance I got. I'd position it at an angle where I could look at her but she wouldn't notice

Still, even though she never caught me doing this, I still felt embarrassed and flustered looking at her

I also found her cuter with hair tied up, of course she looked good with her hair let down too but for reasons I can't really explain I liked her hair tied up more

Just extra tidbits I thought I would share since they popped into my head, just to let it out somewhere. I'm sure all of you also had little things like this that made the one-sided relationship even more brutal
 

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