SuicideFuel My life is already over at 20.

[WawelDragon1683]

I'm mentally ill. I have ocd and it has ruined my life. I was so depressed and miserable because of it that i dropped out of high school at 18. And now i work dead end werehouse jobs.

I thought i would be happier making money but all it did was make me an alcoholic as now i have money to drink everyday.
I can't stop drinking. I have obsessions and anxiety cause of my ocd all day every day.

i have no friends. Noone talks to me. I don't have any contacts in my phone. my siblings and fathet don't speak to me and my mother keeps telling me it'sa ll my fault that my life is awful. I'm too stupid and insane to finish school now,

I tried to go to a psychiatrist but ssris cause me horrible side effect and dameged my brain even more. thereapy hasn't helped either.

There is no hope for me. but not in a way like for users here who say "its over" and then go enjoy their hobbies like vidya or anime.

I don't enjoy anything and everything second is agony. I'm just waiting till my money runs out and then im dying.

 

[NorthernWind]

Do you tried to talk with a priest?

 

[Meus]

Damn dude that sucks. Can't you try to enjoy your copes more?

Overdosing on a cope like alcohol is not good, you should rotate copes. It really works wonders.

At least via the Internet you have access to infinite entertainment. Also reading is a nice cope, try to knowledgemaxx. You don't need school for that shit. Just use Wikipedia and ebooks etc...

 

[WawelDragon1683]

Damn dude that sucks. Can't you try to enjoy your copes more?

Overdosing on a cope like alcohol is not good, you should rotate copes. It really works wonders.

At least via the Internet you have access to infinite entertainment. Also reading is a nice cope, try to knowledgemaxx. You don't need school for that shit. Just use Wikipedia and ebooks etc...

Literally i can't. Honestly just google ocd, Every second i have horrible anxiety over the dumbest shit. How can i enjoy anyhting while im in extreme pain? Alcohol helps numb the pain. I still feel it but at least i can deal with it without crying and ripping my hair out.

 

[Izayacel]

Damn dude that sucks. Can't you try to enjoy your copes more?

Overdosing on a cope like alcohol is not good, you should rotate copes. It really works wonders.

At least via the Internet you have access to infinite entertainment. Also reading is a nice cope, try to knowledgemaxx. You don't need school for that shit. Just use Wikipedia and ebooks etc...

 

[Deleted member 17883]

Brutal

 

[Kamikaze]

Spend some time thinking if you have exhausted all possibilities. If so and you cant tolerate this no more... at least try to make sure that is a proper way that wont leave you disabled. I wish there was something positive to tell you, but im in the same boat..

 

[WawelDragon1683]

Spend some time thinking if you have exhausted all possibilities. If so and you cant tolerate this no more... at least try to make sure that is a proper way that wont leave you disabled. I wish there was something positive to tell you, but im in the same boat..

I will slit my throat. it will be quick, painful death. No chance of permanent injury.

 

[WawelDragon1683]

Slitting throat is going to be too painful so I can't endorse that especially with you, someone who has already suffered much agony; your goal should be to minimize pain, not increase it, even if that increase is short lived. Buy some sodium nitrite instead. Easily available, cheap to buy and easy to prep (just mix in water and drink).

No. I don't see why everyone says it's a bad idea. Mayeb i worded it wrong. I won't slit my throat. I will stab myself with a spring knife. As many time as i can. It will hurt sure. But who cares? I lived through so much pain already that this will be nothing in comparison. I'm doing it this way and i will die quickly. You'll se.

 

[AutisticMonstrosity]

I have OCD also. Diagnosed before I even went to school. Autism only later.

I also can't tolerate high enough doses of SSRI. I've heard that at best sertraline (like 200 mg daily) can eliminate 80 % of OCD.

In mental hospital there was a boy (with OCD) who took the maximum dose of sertraline, but still was in horrendously bad condition... but was always in good mood, laughed... he had spent most of his life in hospital.

 

[tacotown2142]

I'm mentally ill. I have ocd and it has ruined my life. I was so depressed and miserable because of it that i dropped out of high school at 18. And now i work dead end werehouse jobs.

I thought i would be happier making money but all it did was make me an alcoholic as now i have money to drink everyday.
I can't stop drinking. I have obsessions and anxiety cause of my ocd all day every day.

I don't have OCD or anxiety or anything but I've been severely depressed for a large portion of my life and the anhedonia just gets worse and worse. It sucks when not only are you alone, but even your copes stop bringing you any kind of enjoyment.

 

[WawelDragon1683]

I don't have OCD or anxiety or anything but I've been severely depressed for a large portion of my life and the anhedonia just gets worse and worse. It sucks when not only are you alone, but even your copes stop bringing you any kind of enjoyment.

Yeah. I enjoy nothing. no games or movies, shows bring me any joy. I wish there was something enjoyable in this lfie.

 

[AllanKing]

can relate， I also have ocd from 14 yo，when it started I was in high school，then after two years' agony， I did well in college entrance examination and entered a famous university at 16yo
then ocd began to totally destroy me， time quickly moved on， now I am 27yo， I have lost all my prime years with nothing achieved，I spent these years in constant pain，not a single day was carefree，I lost my youth in destabilised pain，no career， no love stories，if I was NT how good my life would be!
but don't commit suicide，insist! we have to defeat fate!
If you are too painful， you can talk to me

 

[Meus]

Dude you still have this forum.

You can shitpost with us and cope with it that way. Don't give normies the satisfaction of being dead, we need you for the coming revolution.

 

[Deleted member 34841]

I’m 20 as well I also drink but only one a day. My copes are video games, buying hookers and gym + diet

 

[Michael15651]

Do you tried to talk with a priest?

I don’t know if you’re joking but I feel like this is worth a shot

 

[WawelDragon1683]

Do you tried to talk with a priest?

no. priests in my country only want money. they would never help me

 

[BITG]

I would give my left nut to be 20 again. Im almost mid twenties now

 

[NorthernWind]

I don’t know if you’re joking but I feel like this is worth a shot

Some people were helped by priests or other Church men.

no. priests in my country only want money. they would never help me

Maybe there are good ones. Priests supposed to be out of this world so they shouldn't care if someone is loser in worldly terms.

 

[Stonersperg]

I'm mentally ill. I have ocd and it has ruined my life. I was so depressed and miserable because of it that i dropped out of high school at 18. And now i work dead end werehouse jobs.

I thought i would be happier making money but all it did was make me an alcoholic as now i have money to drink everyday.
I can't stop drinking. I have obsessions and anxiety cause of my ocd all day every day.

i have no friends. Noone talks to me. I don't have any contacts in my phone. my siblings and fathet don't speak to me and my mother keeps telling me it'sa ll my fault that my life is awful. I'm too stupid and insane to finish school now,

I tried to go to a psychiatrist but ssris cause me horrible side effect and dameged my brain even more. thereapy hasn't helped either.

There is no hope for me. but not in a way like for users here who say "its over" and then go enjoy their hobbies like vidya or anime.

I don't enjoy anything and everything second is agony. I'm just waiting till my money runs out and then im dying.

I had troubles with autism and psychiatric drugs my whole life. I feel you man. Atleast you have the motivation to work and you are working. I just ldar

 

[SayanimCel]

I'm 21, things keeping getting worse and worse