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SuicideFuel My brother is getting married and he wants me to attend . . .

My younger brother messaged me in September that he is getting married in January. He is 5 years younger than me and in his early/mid 20's. :feelsrope:

I have not seen any member of my family for 4 years. I ghosted everyone since October, 2019. :feelzez:

I don't want to attend for the following reasons:

1. I'm on bad terms with my parents and I don't want to see them. My mum used to beat me quite badly as a kid, my dad persistently made me feel incompetent and resented me for not being as masculine as him. I also feel angry for how they knowingly sent me to a primary school full of racist animals who were very hostile towards me. :cryfeels:

2. I am fat. I weigh 75kg at 5ft'7. I don't want to show up after 4 years as a fatty. I'm struggling to lose weight because there's no incentive and I keep eating goyslop as a form of cope. :feelsUnreal:

3. I am non-NT - social anxiety and very socially awkward. The last thing I want is to attend this wedding and be that quiet, weird, loner guy sitting by himself and no one is talking to him. But that WILL happen because I'm always that guy. :fuk:

Although my brother did mention that it would be a 'segregated wedding', that I could see him in private and no one will know. I don't know why he said that. I've never told him about my situation. I don't see how I could attend without running into other people. :feelsugh:

4. There will be looks of scrutiny and suspicion regarding my single status compared to my younger brother. :feelswhat:

5. I will feel extreme ragefuel seeing him get married. Why would I want to see someone celebrating for fulfilling a basic human need that is denied to me? FUCK THAT. :lasereyes:

I've made up my mind that I cannot attend. If he texts me I will have to ignore his message, as much as it would pain me to do so. I'm kind of embarrassed he's way ahead of me, and need to figure out what I'm going to do. :incel:

I'm also concerned that if I don't attend this will cause irreversible resentment from my younger brother if I decide to reconcile with my family in the future . . .

I also don't want to tell him the truth about my situation because I'd be embarrassed to be perceived in such a manner.
You need to pitymax.
Tell him it disrupts you too much to be close to your mum and that you had a hard time and needed years to get over it.
Then congratulate him and wish him all the best.
Should be enough to avoid resentment and he has to accept it because you emotionally blackmailed him with the pitymaxxing
 
He invited you not as a kind gesture, but a power play
How do you know? Are you a mind reader for people you’ve never met?

My younger brother messaged me in September that he is getting married in January. He is 5 years younger than me and in his early/mid 20's. :feelsrope:

I have not seen any member of my family for 4 years. I ghosted everyone since October, 2019. :feelzez:

I don't want to attend for the following reasons:

1. I'm on bad terms with my parents and I don't want to see them. My mum used to beat me quite badly as a kid, my dad persistently made me feel incompetent and resented me for not being as masculine as him. I also feel angry for how they knowingly sent me to a primary school full of racist animals who were very hostile towards me. :cryfeels:

2. I am fat. I weigh 75kg at 5ft'7. I don't want to show up after 4 years as a fatty. I'm struggling to lose weight because there's no incentive and I keep eating goyslop as a form of cope. :feelsUnreal:

3. I am non-NT - social anxiety and very socially awkward. The last thing I want is to attend this wedding and be that quiet, weird, loner guy sitting by himself and no one is talking to him. But that WILL happen because I'm always that guy. :fuk:

Although my brother did mention that it would be a 'segregated wedding', that I could see him in private and no one will know. I don't know why he said that. I've never told him about my situation. I don't see how I could attend without running into other people. :feelsugh:

4. There will be looks of scrutiny and suspicion regarding my single status compared to my younger brother. :feelswhat:

5. I will feel extreme ragefuel seeing him get married. Why would I want to see someone celebrating for fulfilling a basic human need that is denied to me? FUCK THAT. :lasereyes:

I've made up my mind that I cannot attend. If he texts me I will have to ignore his message, as much as it would pain me to do so. I'm kind of embarrassed he's way ahead of me, and need to figure out what I'm going to do. :incel:

I'm also concerned that if I don't attend this will cause irreversible resentment from my younger brother if I decide to reconcile with my family in the future . . .

I also don't want to tell him the truth about my situation because I'd be embarrassed to be perceived in such a manner.
He’s your brother, and if you don’t have beef you should go. He might have made those special provisions for you to avoid your parents.
 
How do you know? Are you a mind reader for people you’ve never met?


He’s your brother, and if you don’t have beef you should go. He might have made those special provisions for you to avoid your parents.
Agree but it sounds too good to be true; i.e., suspicious. Therefore I’m concerned this is a mog attempt
 
Agree but it sounds too good to be true; i.e., suspicious. Therefore I’m concerned this is a mog attempt
Who tf tries to mog their own brother at their wedding jfl.
 
If you were on bad terms with your bro, then it's a little sus why he's inviting you now.

If you were on neutral or good terms, then you should be supportive.
 
Block his number for a while, then escape. Find a plausible excuse too.
 
Just go bro and make ur brother happy if he gonna be happy if he sow u if not Dont go than
 

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