J
wrong or am I a lazy scumbag, I don’t know. Any help with this question, I’m 21, white, male. Live at home. Yes today it got heated on my part, and slightly mums but mostly mine, I regret that, I couldn’t even have an answer as to why I don’t want to do anything. I do game, I admit that, I study online and did my first year that way and had a hard time with my anxiety and getting stuff done and not avoiding it and reading the readings and studying (bullshit I know, blue pill omega stuff and I blame myself) but I’m going for a class at campus as well as one online this term (when it starts) so I’ll be going out more then, but she rattled off all the things I don’t do/don’t want to, I don’t usually raise my voice at my mum, or at least I don’t do it as much as I have these last two days, she has been a bit confrontational I admit but I usually these days try to keep the peace and not yell. More scummy shit which shows my poor character. I totally agree with all she has said, and today was a day that I rarely have (I actually have a genuine emotion and not something shallow) and that was a few angry moments, I didn’t yell sentences, I yelled my reply to her getting up me a bit a few times hoping she would leave it, twice, and once last night but I’m not proud of it, I actually felt genuine anger (not performance or feeling unseen type stuff) I felt anger, no a show or any shit like that, actual anger in those brief yell reply I did, which worries me, maybe I am depressed like was suggested a few weeks back, I don’t know, can someone give me some advice if they like? Those moments of genuine anger today say to me I am not caring, I am concerned. To be clear it’s not a post about my mum, I’m the one with some problems I’m not getting through and I don’t know what they are and she is worried about me very much, feel free to roast if you want anyway. Thanks.
