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Blackpill (MULTIPLE STUDIES) The dating world is matriarchal, and women have it easier with dating.

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Lightning Wing

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Patriarchy never existed
That's what I think too. Because if you think about it. Women were never treated like slaves. Because how would you have chivalry then?
 
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Lightning Wing

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But how do we change it?
Women are doing their best to ensure it will never be changed. Not only will it not change, it will exacerbate. That's why they're so obsessed with " abolishing impossible beauty standards ". They don't even want to put in the bare minimum effort they've always put into not becoming a land whale.
 
Mr.Sophistication

Mr.Sophistication

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Your doing God´s work man.
 
BPJ

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the mother of all dating: men vs women threads. i so want to convert this entire thread into a video..thank you so much
 
cvh1991

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Women have it easier than men when it comes to dating and finding a sex partner. This is gonna sound like a redpilled post but this is all true, and i have statistics to back it up.

The fact that men pursue, women get pursued makes women have the upper hand in the dating world. They can just sit there and do nothing and men will pursue her inevitably. A man has to make the first move, he has to initiate and start a conversation with her and has to know what to say, and has to set up the date and do everything else. He also has to make sure the 1st date is nothing super fancy but nothing too basic (some women said theyll automatically reject a guy if it's coffee or a walk). many women expects the first date to be perfect, slightest mistake and she might ghost him. and studies show that when dating, men fall in love quicker and become more attached than women do. this is because men pursue, so the man might be eager to start a relationship with her to begin with, she's going to consider him as a possibility and may or may not accept it.

LOTS of studies have shown that women are much more selective than men. This is because women get pursued and these men may or may not be someone she likes while men pursue so any woman he pursues he likes, and because women get pursued by so many men they have lots of options to choose from and therefore are selective and pick the cream of the crop. the man has to have lower standards because that way he can increase the number of women he pursues to increase his odds because women are selective and many will reject/ghost him. As a result, this, along with men pursuing and women putting no effort and then suddenly getting pursued, gives women the upper hand in the dating world.

Here's some evidence that women have it easier in the dating world. Let's look at offline vs online contexts:

Online

Women have it so much easier on dating apps than men do. Studies have shown that because women are much choosier than men with swiping right, men have to spend a lot more time than women to get as many matches as them:



Statistics show that on tinder, men swipe right 46% of the time while women swipe right only 14% of the time.


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According to this data: men swipe right on 52% of women but women right on only 5%. Women match with 36% of their likes but men match with less than 2% of them.

Many might argue this is because tinder is for hookups and women will value looks more for short-term than long-term relationships. This isn't the factor. In fact, on Hinge, which is based on long-term relationships, the top 1% most attractive men comprise 16.4% of right swipes men receive compared to the top 1% most attractive women comprising only 11.2%, the top 5% most attractive men comprise 41.1% of right-swipes men receive compared to the top 5% most attractive women comprising 30.6%, the top 10% most attractive men comprise 58.0% of right-swipes men receive and the top 10% most attractive women comprising 45.7%, and the bottom 50% of men comprising only 4.3% of right-swipes of men and the bottom 50% of women on Hinge comprising 7.9% of right-swipes of women.


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Even on OkCupid, men over 6 ft only can receive slightly less than 1 unsolicited message per week whereas women under 6 ft (virtually all women) receive 3 or 4 messages per week on average. It's not until a woman is 6'4 until she receives how much men over 6 ft receive. Even a 6 ft woman receives over twice as many messages per week as 6 ft men.

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Women receive higher reply rates than men when sending a message on OkCupid, and even black women, who struggle the most of all women on dating apps, had higher reply rates when she sent messages than men overall did.

According to Pew Research, 57% of men said they didn't get enough messages on dating websites compared to 24% of women. About 30% of women said they received too many messages compared to 6% of men. 36% of men and 45% of women said they received just the right amount of messages.

Men don't get matches much at all, and when they do, it's often another man. Gay men get more matches than straight men do. So why is this? Many argue it's because most dating app users are men. That's barely why. Men, when looking for other men online, get way more matches than men looking for women. Given that only 2.5% of the population is gay, and even the vast majority of bisexuals enter opposite-sex relationships, and given that most people look for the opposite sex, the fact that men looking for men get way more matches disproves this argument. Men should still be able to get more matches than they already do because it's still common for women to use dating apps. Many feminists online argued that all men do is put mere selfies and no bio in their profile, but this is false. Their unverifiable anecdotes about seeing men do that on dating apps don't prove anything because anecdotes can vary and anecdotes aren't valid evidence. In fact, statistics about dating apps show that men are more likely to mention animals or pets, way more likely to mention outdoors (women often don't mention it), more likely to mention music, and are less likely to, but often do, mention emojis.

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So why do women swipe left so much but men swipe right a lot? It's because women have higher physical standards than men. Men find way more women physically attractive than women find men physically attractive. In fact, on OkCupid, women found 80% of men below average-looking, but men didn't feel this way about women they saw.

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Although women swiped right on many men they didn't find very attractive and men often swipe right on attractive women, this is because women rarely see men on there they find even remotely attractive or acceptable looking so they probably scrape the bottom of the barrell while men have plenty of women they find attractive, and plenty of them still message women who are average looking to them anyways. Women still rarely swipe right on dating apps, and extremely attractive men still receive most likes from them on Hinge, and attractiveness is more vital for men than women when it comes to getting likes on Hinge.

Many will argue this only shows what women on okcupid are like but even in real life this is true according to studies of offline samples. Women in general have higher physical standards than men in general do. In fact, in a study, they found that men rated women much better looking than women rated men and this was true for all age groups. In fact, male faces were given better rating by men than by women, so men found men to be better looking on average than women found men. Women even rated other women better looking than they found men to be and rated other women much better than how men rated other men. In fact, women rated women's faces better than men did when it came to middle aged women and old women but not young women (they rated young women just a little less lower than men rated young women).

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In fact, if you're a man, a gay man is more likely than a straight woman to find you attractive, regardless of your sexual orientation (whether you're gay just like him or straight unlike him). And this chart here shows that, and it even shows how straight men are attracted to women more than straight women are attracted to men:

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This explains why men who look for other men on dating apps have more matches than men who look for women on dating apps.

So you can see here that women have higher physical standards than men, and studies show that race and physical attractiveness are the only predictors of swiping behavior on dating apps (and this is true for all dating apps including ones for long-term relationships in case people say "but tinder is for hookups and women value looks more for hookups"). In fact, people typically swiped in less than a second and they found that personality, interests, hobbies and bios played little to no prediction in swiping behavior. Race also played a role, with whites having more success than people of color.

In fact, studies show that women are far more likely than men to have a racial preference for dating, and of those women, not that many women of color with a racial preference excluded white guys (except most black women with a racial preference). The vast majority of women with a racial preference excluded Asian men, Middle Eastern men, Latino men, Black men, and Indian men. Among men with a racial preference, not that many excluded white women except black men, who most did. Only about half of men of each race with a racial preference excluded Asian women (except black men who most did) and only about 39% of black men with a preference excluded Latinas whereas only about half of men of other races with a racial preference excluded Latinas. Most men, however, did exclude black women, Middle Eastern women and Indian women. In fact, about 39% of Asian women with a racial preference excluded their own race whereas it wasn't half as common for any man of any race to exclude his own race. In fact, women of all races (except black women) found white men the most attractive. Men often found Asian women attractive.

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You can see here that the reason women are so choosy on dating apps is because they don't find many men attractive while men find many women attractive, and, given that women are more likely to have racial preferences and usually prefer white men while men with racial preferences are less choosy, it's much easier for white men than other races of men on dating apps, whereas women won't struggle on dating apps unless she's black.

The top most attractive men on Hinge also comprise more right-swipes than the top most attractive women, and this is more problematic for men than women, because studies show that women are, on average, more conventionally attractive than men. One of the studies above show that both men and women perceived women of all age groups to be better looking than men of all age groups. Also:


According to Psychology Today, "Earlier studies indeed show that women are on average physically more attractive than men both in Japan and in the United States. The analysis of the NCDS data replicates the sex difference in physical attractiveness in the United Kingdom". They noted an admittedly creepy study:







In another study, they still found women to be more conventionally attractive:

The stimulus materials for the “Tinder” task was created as follows: A total of 271 pictures of friendly-looking faces was pretested for their level of attractivity. These pictures were obtained from a social media platform to appear as naturally as possible. Thirty-one participants indicated how attractive they experienced each of the depicted persons on a 1=not at all to 8=very much response scale. Those 80 pictures which ranged most closely around the mean were chosen for the OT study (male: M = 2.91, SD =0.90, Min =1.33, Max=5.40; female: M=3.63, SD=0.90, Min=1.81, Max=5.63).

More studies confirm that women are more conventionally attractive than men:


So why do women swipe left and men often swipe right? Because women have much higher physical standards than men and are more likely to have racial preferences than men, favoring white men the most while men with racial preferences might be less choosy about which race they do or don't find attractive, and because attractive men and women tend to disproportionately get swiped right on and women are more conventionally attractive than men. According to Quartz:


But they only break gender norms if he's really attractive, and women are more conventionally attractive than men and women have much higher physical standards than men. This is what causes women to be super choosy compared to men on dating apps.

Offline

Men are less likely than women to be sexually active and/or in a relationship. Single men are also less likely than single women to be single by choice.


Even offline, women have it easier than men.

First of all, women have higher physical standards than men, and this makes it more difficult, as a result, for ugly men than for ugly women, and easier for attractive men than attractive women. Although women often state they value looks over personality, studies digging into their subsconscious found that women, when looking for a long-term partner, only value a man's personality if she finds him at least moderately attractive. If he isn't good-looking to her, she won't date him regardless of his personality. Personality only helps if you cross that threshold. The study was replicated two years later with the same results. Even another study found that college women now value physical attractiveness in a relationship partner just as much as men did. This is because as time went by, male models and male bodybuilders became more commonly shown on the Internet such as Instagram and male bodybuilding became more normalized, and women are now more likely to be financially independent, so they value looks much more now than they used to in the past. Women also, according to a study I recall but cannot retrieve, tend to only desire casual sex with a man if she finds him outright attractive (but not if she finds him only moderately attractive because women value looks even more for short-term relationships than for long-term relationships) while men will want casual sex with a woman if he finds her at least moderately attractive.

Men have to pursue, so they have to make the first move, initiate a conversation, show lots of charisma, make her laugh, know how to have a good conversation, know how to flirt, etc. and she has to decide of all these men who pursue her which one she finds most attractive and will pick him of all the men who pursued her. Men have to the be the cream of the crop of all the men who pursue her to get with her but most women will inevitably be desired by a lot of men. Men, on the other hand, have to get a woman to desire him and have to compete with other men who may have pursued the same woman. Men also fall in love faster than women according to studies, so they are more interested in her because when men pursue, of course men get attached quicker especially when it's harder for them for dating. She has to decide whether to accept, reject, continue dating, or ghost.

Additionally, statistics now show that among young adults, young men are now less likely than young women to have had sex in the past year. Although men are often slightly more likely than women in the past few decades to have had no sex in the past year, the gap is really big now.

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Even another study confirmed this to be true that young men ages 18-24 were less sexually active than women ages 18-24.

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According to Pew Research 2020, in October 2019, 51% of men ages 18-29 were single compared to 32% of women that age, and 27% of men ages 30-49 were single compared to 19% of women that age. There is a minuscule difference in prevalence of singles among men and women ages 50-64 (27% of men that age and 29% of women that age were single), but 49% of women over 65 were single compared to 21% of men that age, but this is because women are more likely than men to be widowed since men die earlier than women on average, men are more likely to remarry (including being more likely to remarry after widowhood), and women are, on average, younger than men in marriage. Also, single men were more likely than single women to say they're looking for a date. Among single people ages 18-39, 67% of single men were looking to date and 33% weren't whereas 61% of single women were looking for dates and 39% weren't. Among singles over 40, 55% of men were looking to date and 42% were not whereas 71% of single women over 40 were looking to date and 29% were not.

Also, among people looking to date who found it difficult to find a date, 56% of women said it was hard to find someone who meets their expectations compared to just 35% of men, 65% of women compared to 45% of men said it was hard to find someone looking for the same type of relationship as them, and 52% of men compared to just 35% of women said it's hard for them to approach people. This means women can't the right guy despite finding men who do desire them while men are struggling to approach women and are unable to pursue. The single women found men who liked them even if she didn't like him but men struggled to pursue women and find a woman who liked them.

Men are also more likely than women to be later-in-life virgins, and guess what? Later-in-life female virgins are more likely than later-in-life male virgins to finally lose their virginity. In fact, while hardly any of the later-in-life female virgins resorted to hookers, it's possible that some later-in-life male virgins resorted to hookers. The percentage of later-in-life female virgins continued to decrease a lot faster after 25 than for male later-in-life virgins. What's noteworthy is that the female virgins probably didn't use hookers but some of the male virgins possibly did as a last resort.

Studies consistently show that most involuntary virgins (virgins not by choice) are men: "In every study reporting reluctant virginity, there were more male than female reluctant virgins; in fact, the majority of reluctant virgins were always men."

In a Swiss study called "Virgins at age 26: who are they?", they found that 58% of 26 year old virgins were men. The authors report: "The main reason for not having had sex for females was I have not found the right person (46%) followed by I want to wait to be married (19%) and for males I have not had the occasion (47%) and I have not found the right person (19%), respectively." In fact, in the pivotal study "Involuntary Celibacy: A Life Course Analysis", a majority of the virgins, singles (people who are currently sexually inactive but may have had some sex long ago. This includes those who only used hookers or surrogates.), and dead bedroom marriage people were men, but the partnered celibates still had more women than the singles and virgins. A majority were still men among partnered celibates.

Unattractiveness lowers men's chances for finding a partner but it doesn't lower women's chances

Even women who have unattractive traits don't struggle much at all while men with unattractive traits do. For example, studies have shown that autistic women are far more likely than autistic men to experience sex or relationships. Autistic men were found to be way less likely than neurotypical people to be in a relationship or sexually active. This wasn't nearly as true for autistic women, just to a limited extent was this true for autistic women. In one study, autistic women weren't even less likely to experience their first relationship than neurotypical women (although they were less likely to have had sex or their first kiss), but autistic men were way less likely than neurotypical men to experience any of these things. In fact, autistic women were way more likely than autistic men to experience any of these things and a majority (but not vast majority) of autistic women had sex or their first french kiss before. A vast majority had kissed with mouth closed before, too. Most of the autistic men never had sex yet, and most did not have their first french kiss yet. Some had kissed someone with mouth closed before or have had a relationship before, but many of the autistic men haven't done those two yet either. Only half of them had held someone's hand before. The autistic women were even more likely than the neurotypical men to have had a relationship before. There is some evidence I've heard online (including anecdotes) that many autistic women even date neurotypical men. In another study, 44.6% of autistic men said they never have sex but the vast majority desired sex a lot. 50% of autistic women said they never have sex but 42.5% never desired it and 15% desired it less than once a month (compared to only 10.3% of autistic men desiring it less than once a month and only 3.6% saying they never desire it). Of autistic people who did have sex, many only had sex once in a while rather than often. Not that many had sex regularly. 46.2% of the autistic women and only 16.2% of the autistic men were in a relationship. The vast majority of the neurotypical men and women were in a relationship.

Ugliness also made it harder for men than for women to find a partner. For example, studies have shown that ugly men were more likely to be adult virgins but this wasn't particularly that true for ugly women. In fact, studies have shown that ugly men had less sex partners and attractive men had the most sex partners, but ugly women had more sex partners than attractive women had the least sex partners. The fattest women had the most sex partners and most casual sex and skinny women had the least sex partners and least casual sex. Ugly men and attractive women had the least casual sex and attractive men and ugly women had the most casual sex. Ugly men and attractive women had the least sex partners and attractive men and ugly women had the most sex partners. What's the reason for all of this? Probably because physically attractive women, studies show, have the highest standards but this wasn't true for physically attractive men. Men with high status and highest potential to be a good provider had the highest standards, but physically attractive men did not have high standards. Attractive women will be the most selective and only pick the cream of the crop and has a low acceptance rate for which of the men who pursue her she will be partners with because she's pursued by men way more than most women are, making her choosier, so she can get a long-term, monogamous relationship with a guy and is in monogamous relationships for a long period of time, and doesn't sleep with men who pursue her as easily, making her number of partners low. Because men pursue, women get pursued, and because men have lower physical standards and standards in general than women, ugly women may have gotten pursued by many men and are more open to having sex with more of them than attractive women will because ugly women are the least choosy compared to other women.

Ugly men probably don't have very high standards, and studies show that inexperienced men have lower physical standards than other men do, so ugly men, being less sexually experienced, might have lower physical standards than men in general but physically attractive men don't have higher standards than men in general, and ugly men have less sex partners and are more likely to be virgins while attractive men have more sex partners than most men and are less likely to be a virgin. This means that ugly men are less desired by women and cannot find a partner as easily as other men, and they have less casual sex and will stick to more relationships because women, despite valuing looks for relationships and thus probably rejecting ugly men for relationships, value looks even more for flings than for relationships, which means if ugly men get anything, it's more likely to be a relationship than casual sex. Attractive men, on the other hand, are often desired by women more easily, and women will only give men they personally find very attractive a chance for casual sex (as I mentioned earlier), so attractive men can sow their wild oats and sleep around more. Attractive men don't have high standards and will sleep around, and ugly men, if anything, have lower physical standards but still will fail to find a partner as easily and will have mostly a chance only with relationships (if anything).

In a study, they found that ugly men had lower chances of finding a partner but not ugly women (except for working class women). In fact, very unattractive women are more likely than unattractive or average women to be married by age 29. This wasn't true for very unattractive men.

Women's dating preferences are a vicious circle for men who struggle attracting women and a virtuous circle for men who are chick magnets.

Studies have confirmed the preselection theory of women being attracted to chick magnets. Studies have shown (and you can look it up) that women are attracted to men who have girlfriends/wives and are attracted to men who other women find attractive. In fact, when women were asked to rate men, upon being shown what other women rated him, they changed their ratings to match that of other women, showing that women have copycat dating preferences. This is exemplified by video redpill interviews with random women where a group of them talk about their preferences and they all just suddenly agree with each other. Women also are attracted to confidence, but those chick magnet guys got confidence just because women found them attractive to begin with. And men who struggle to find a partner lack confidence because they could never find a partner. Their confidence or lack of confidence didn't just come out of thin air. That's something people tend to never realize. Women expect him to be confident, he cannot always be available, she's more attracted to him when he isn't trying to pursue her or when he ignores her, because it suggests he's taken or has tons of options and she isn't good enough. It suggests he's a prize who other women want. Men will be more attracted to a woman who other men might disagree about whether she's attractive or not because there's less competition while women like a guy who has a lot of women competing for him because she doesn't need a guy who lacks competition who she can get more easily because she's already being pursued by men to begin with so finding a guy who is more available and has less competitors is unnecessary. When a man even replies back instantly, women call it desperate. Women find desperation unattractive, but chick magnets lack desperation because dating and finding partners is so easy for them they don't need to be desperate, but if any man who struggles is desperate, struggling made him desperate because he needs to put in much more effort. Desperation didn't cause his struggle because what else caused desperation? It doesn't come out of thin air.

So in conclusion, women's dating preferences/behaviors give advantages to the already advantaged and disadvantages to the already disadvantaged. It's a virtuous and vicious cycle, respectively.

Why women are more selective

It's not because of evolution and women needing to select which men has the best genes or breadwinning skills. This idea that men must sow their wild oats and impregnate tons of women to populate the Earth and women must decide which men has the best genes or breadwinning skills is a flawed evolutionary theory and is just the reason why society socialized men to pursue and be initiators, and women to get pursued and be gatekeepers. In fact, the men pursue, women get pursued rule is why women are choosier than men. In fact, female promiscuity was actually evolutionarily adaptive sometimes. The reason women are more selective is because men pursue, women get pursued. This makes women have many men pursue her who she may or may not like while men desire 100% of the women they pursue, and women get pursued by men so much, they have so many options to choose from, making them choosy. Men have to lower their standards to increase the number of women they pursue because women are choosier and might reject them, and men will desire 100% of the women they pursue, so when searching and pursuing, they will have lower standards while women get pursued and decide if they like him or not and they may or may not be someone she likes. Men won't know if the woman will like him back, so in order to increase his odds of finding a woman who will, he must lower his standards to increase the number of women he pursues. This is why women are choosier. In fact, in a speed dating study, when women pursued, they were less choosy.

If women pursued, men got pursued, men end up being pickier and women are less picky, and this was found to be true in a speed-dating study. This is the Sadie-Hawkins effect. Men aren't hardwired to have low standards and fuck anyone they see and women weren't hardwired to be choosy. Social situations and socializations caused this.

Additionally, it's easier for women to be attractive-looking because men have to rely solely on their genetics for being attractive (your muscles, haircut and clothes don't compensate much for your face and height and penis size) while women can put on makeup which makes them look more attractive (studies show people find women with makeup more attractive). Women decorate their appearance more than men and makeup helps while men have to solely rely on their own genetics. Men don't even value height as much as women do.

It's easier for men to attract gay men than attract straight women

In a study using experimental methods (in case self-unaware people say they'd date a bisexual when subconsciously they wouldn't) to see how willing people are to date a bisexual, they found that gay men were more romantically/sexually attracted to men regardless of the target man's sexual orientation than straight women are attracted to men regardless of the target man's sexual orientation.

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The dating world needs to change

If women pursued, men got pursued, it would possibly be harder for women than for men. In fact, if women had to pursue and men didn't, I promise you that there'd be campaigns against it and feminsits would be protesting to make men pursue just as often by now. Society needs to get rid of this men pursue rule, it just gives women the upper hand in the dating world. It makes it easier for women when it comes to dating and sex and finding a partner for dating/sex. This is why some men think dating is a game to win and say a guy has game if he attracts women, because it does seem like a game when so many men struggle to get a woman to desire him but the vast majority of women automatically get desired because men pursue. Men have to compete with other men all the time for the same woman and women get to choose which man "wins the contest".

And the worst part? Society puts pressure on men to be chick magnets who can attract any woman they want. They don't put pressure on women to be "dude magnets" (that word isn't used as much) because people expect women to automatically attract many men because men pursue, women get pursued, so they know some men won't attract women as much and will put pressure on them to be chick magnets and stigmatize them if women reject them.

The fact that men are expected to pursue is why society believes all rape victims are women and all rapists are men. Men are initiators of sex expected to pursue, so they are expected to automatically consent to any offering of sex and do anything they can to get laid. Women are pursued, and expected to be gatekeepers and be more selective and pick the cream of the crop, so they are taught they can pick and choose which man they want, so they're allowed to say no to sex. Women aren't expected to automatically consent to sex because some men who pursue she might not like back because people always desire who they pursue but don't always desire who pursues them. Women are expected to pick the cream of the crop of pursuers instead of having sex with all of them. Otherwise, she's considered "easy" by society because it's easy for women to become promiscuous if they say yes a lot to any sexual offering but men who automatically consent to sex aren't suddenly promiscuous unless they're extremely attractive. Rape is "initiation" and women resisting or refusing to consent during rape is "gatekeeping", so people think all rapists are men and all rape victims are women. If this men pursue BS didn't exist, maybe we wouldn't have this stereotype about all rapists being men and all victims are women, or people having double standards favoring female statutory rapists. Maybe we wouldn't have catcalling, because contrary to the feminist myth that men catcall to "control women", men typically do it because they think it's a normal way to pursue women.

Society should get rid of the men pursue rule, and the only reason they haven't is because it benefits women. When inequality benefits women, nobody cares. The dating world is matriarchal, and women have the power in the dating world. This needs to change. If women had to pursue and men had it easier and were pickier as a result, this would be labeled patriarchy and feminists would've started campaigns against it by now. They need to make men and women pursue each other if they want equality in dating. Gay men pursue each other as far as i know and i think lesbians do, too, and it's easier for men to attract gay men than to attract straight women.

TLDR

Women have the upper hand in the dating world and have it easier because men pursue, women get pursued, which makes women choosier than men. And this needs to change.

@Robtical @Fat Link pin?
Terabased holy shit — appreciate the studies you included.
 
StayFrosty

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that's a fancy way of saying it's over
 
anonymous106

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Nice thread
 
D

Deleted member 42077

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Toilets act like they're the prize when in reality they are flawed human beings with self-centered intentions.
Calling them humans and calling them beings can both be disputed.
 
TheDarkEnigma

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Calling them humans and calling them beings can both be disputed.
I mean, in the sense that foids are just imperfect flesh and bone who get old and will later rot in the ground.

Foids like every other living thing have their own self-interest as their priority.
 
CurrycelRaja

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Women have it easier than men when it comes to dating and finding a sex partner. This is gonna sound like a redpilled post but this is all true, and i have statistics to back it up.

The fact that men pursue, women get pursued makes women have the upper hand in the dating world. They can just sit there and do nothing and men will pursue her inevitably. A man has to make the first move, he has to initiate and start a conversation with her and has to know what to say, and has to set up the date and do everything else. He also has to make sure the 1st date is nothing super fancy but nothing too basic (some women said theyll automatically reject a guy if it's coffee or a walk). many women expects the first date to be perfect, slightest mistake and she might ghost him. and studies show that when dating, men fall in love quicker and become more attached than women do. this is because men pursue, so the man might be eager to start a relationship with her to begin with, she's going to consider him as a possibility and may or may not accept it.

LOTS of studies have shown that women are much more selective than men. This is because women get pursued and these men may or may not be someone she likes while men pursue so any woman he pursues he likes, and because women get pursued by so many men they have lots of options to choose from and therefore are selective and pick the cream of the crop. the man has to have lower standards because that way he can increase the number of women he pursues to increase his odds because women are selective and many will reject/ghost him. As a result, this, along with men pursuing and women putting no effort and then suddenly getting pursued, gives women the upper hand in the dating world.

Here's some evidence that women have it easier in the dating world. Let's look at offline vs online contexts:

Online

Women have it so much easier on dating apps than men do. Studies have shown that because women are much choosier than men with swiping right, men have to spend a lot more time than women to get as many matches as them:



Statistics show that on tinder, men swipe right 46% of the time while women swipe right only 14% of the time.


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According to this data: men swipe right on 52% of women but women right on only 5%. Women match with 36% of their likes but men match with less than 2% of them.

Many might argue this is because tinder is for hookups and women will value looks more for short-term than long-term relationships. This isn't the factor. In fact, on Hinge, which is based on long-term relationships, the top 1% most attractive men comprise 16.4% of right swipes men receive compared to the top 1% most attractive women comprising only 11.2%, the top 5% most attractive men comprise 41.1% of right-swipes men receive compared to the top 5% most attractive women comprising 30.6%, the top 10% most attractive men comprise 58.0% of right-swipes men receive and the top 10% most attractive women comprising 45.7%, and the bottom 50% of men comprising only 4.3% of right-swipes of men and the bottom 50% of women on Hinge comprising 7.9% of right-swipes of women.


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Even on OkCupid, men over 6 ft only can receive slightly less than 1 unsolicited message per week whereas women under 6 ft (virtually all women) receive 3 or 4 messages per week on average. It's not until a woman is 6'4 until she receives how much men over 6 ft receive. Even a 6 ft woman receives over twice as many messages per week as 6 ft men.

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Women receive higher reply rates than men when sending a message on OkCupid, and even black women, who struggle the most of all women on dating apps, had higher reply rates when she sent messages than men overall did.

According to Pew Research, 57% of men said they didn't get enough messages on dating websites compared to 24% of women. About 30% of women said they received too many messages compared to 6% of men. 36% of men and 45% of women said they received just the right amount of messages.

Men don't get matches much at all, and when they do, it's often another man. Gay men get more matches than straight men do. So why is this? Many argue it's because most dating app users are men. That's barely why. Men, when looking for other men online, get way more matches than men looking for women. Given that only 2.5% of the population is gay, and even the vast majority of bisexuals enter opposite-sex relationships, and given that most people look for the opposite sex, the fact that men looking for men get way more matches disproves this argument. Men should still be able to get more matches than they already do because it's still common for women to use dating apps. Many feminists online argued that all men do is put mere selfies and no bio in their profile, but this is false. Their unverifiable anecdotes about seeing men do that on dating apps don't prove anything because anecdotes can vary and anecdotes aren't valid evidence. In fact, statistics about dating apps show that men are more likely to mention animals or pets, way more likely to mention outdoors (women often don't mention it), more likely to mention music, and are less likely to, but often do, mention emojis.

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So why do women swipe left so much but men swipe right a lot? It's because women have higher physical standards than men. Men find way more women physically attractive than women find men physically attractive. In fact, on OkCupid, women found 80% of men below average-looking, but men didn't feel this way about women they saw.

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Although women swiped right on many men they didn't find very attractive and men often swipe right on attractive women, this is because women rarely see men on there they find even remotely attractive or acceptable looking so they probably scrape the bottom of the barrell while men have plenty of women they find attractive, and plenty of them still message women who are average looking to them anyways. Women still rarely swipe right on dating apps, and extremely attractive men still receive most likes from them on Hinge, and attractiveness is more vital for men than women when it comes to getting likes on Hinge.

Many will argue this only shows what women on okcupid are like but even in real life this is true according to studies of offline samples. Women in general have higher physical standards than men in general do. In fact, in a study, they found that men rated women much better looking than women rated men and this was true for all age groups. In fact, male faces were given better rating by men than by women, so men found men to be better looking on average than women found men. Women even rated other women better looking than they found men to be and rated other women much better than how men rated other men. In fact, women rated women's faces better than men did when it came to middle aged women and old women but not young women (they rated young women just a little less lower than men rated young women).

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In fact, if you're a man, a gay man is more likely than a straight woman to find you attractive, regardless of your sexual orientation (whether you're gay just like him or straight unlike him). And this chart here shows that, and it even shows how straight men are attracted to women more than straight women are attracted to men:

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This explains why men who look for other men on dating apps have more matches than men who look for women on dating apps.

So you can see here that women have higher physical standards than men, and studies show that race and physical attractiveness are the only predictors of swiping behavior on dating apps (and this is true for all dating apps including ones for long-term relationships in case people say "but tinder is for hookups and women value looks more for hookups"). In fact, people typically swiped in less than a second and they found that personality, interests, hobbies and bios played little to no prediction in swiping behavior. Race also played a role, with whites having more success than people of color.

In fact, studies show that women are far more likely than men to have a racial preference for dating, and of those women, not that many women of color with a racial preference excluded white guys (except most black women with a racial preference). The vast majority of women with a racial preference excluded Asian men, Middle Eastern men, Latino men, Black men, and Indian men. Among men with a racial preference, not that many excluded white women except black men, who most did. Only about half of men of each race with a racial preference excluded Asian women (except black men who most did) and only about 39% of black men with a preference excluded Latinas whereas only about half of men of other races with a racial preference excluded Latinas. Most men, however, did exclude black women, Middle Eastern women and Indian women. In fact, about 39% of Asian women with a racial preference excluded their own race whereas it wasn't half as common for any man of any race to exclude his own race. In fact, women of all races (except black women) found white men the most attractive. Men often found Asian women attractive.

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You can see here that the reason women are so choosy on dating apps is because they don't find many men attractive while men find many women attractive, and, given that women are more likely to have racial preferences and usually prefer white men while men with racial preferences are less choosy, it's much easier for white men than other races of men on dating apps, whereas women won't struggle on dating apps unless she's black.

The top most attractive men on Hinge also comprise more right-swipes than the top most attractive women, and this is more problematic for men than women, because studies show that women are, on average, more conventionally attractive than men. One of the studies above show that both men and women perceived women of all age groups to be better looking than men of all age groups. Also:


According to Psychology Today, "Earlier studies indeed show that women are on average physically more attractive than men both in Japan and in the United States. The analysis of the NCDS data replicates the sex difference in physical attractiveness in the United Kingdom". They noted an admittedly creepy study:







In another study, they still found women to be more conventionally attractive:

The stimulus materials for the “Tinder” task was created as follows: A total of 271 pictures of friendly-looking faces was pretested for their level of attractivity. These pictures were obtained from a social media platform to appear as naturally as possible. Thirty-one participants indicated how attractive they experienced each of the depicted persons on a 1=not at all to 8=very much response scale. Those 80 pictures which ranged most closely around the mean were chosen for the OT study (male: M = 2.91, SD =0.90, Min =1.33, Max=5.40; female: M=3.63, SD=0.90, Min=1.81, Max=5.63).

More studies confirm that women are more conventionally attractive than men:


So why do women swipe left and men often swipe right? Because women have much higher physical standards than men and are more likely to have racial preferences than men, favoring white men the most while men with racial preferences might be less choosy about which race they do or don't find attractive, and because attractive men and women tend to disproportionately get swiped right on and women are more conventionally attractive than men. According to Quartz:


But they only break gender norms if he's really attractive, and women are more conventionally attractive than men and women have much higher physical standards than men. This is what causes women to be super choosy compared to men on dating apps.

Offline

Men are less likely than women to be sexually active and/or in a relationship. Single men are also less likely than single women to be single by choice.


Even offline, women have it easier than men.

First of all, women have higher physical standards than men, and this makes it more difficult, as a result, for ugly men than for ugly women, and easier for attractive men than attractive women. Although women often state they value looks over personality, studies digging into their subsconscious found that women, when looking for a long-term partner, only value a man's personality if she finds him at least moderately attractive. If he isn't good-looking to her, she won't date him regardless of his personality. Personality only helps if you cross that threshold. The study was replicated two years later with the same results. Even another study found that college women now value physical attractiveness in a relationship partner just as much as men did. This is because as time went by, male models and male bodybuilders became more commonly shown on the Internet such as Instagram and male bodybuilding became more normalized, and women are now more likely to be financially independent, so they value looks much more now than they used to in the past. Women also, according to a study I recall but cannot retrieve, tend to only desire casual sex with a man if she finds him outright attractive (but not if she finds him only moderately attractive because women value looks even more for short-term relationships than for long-term relationships) while men will want casual sex with a woman if he finds her at least moderately attractive.

Men have to pursue, so they have to make the first move, initiate a conversation, show lots of charisma, make her laugh, know how to have a good conversation, know how to flirt, etc. and she has to decide of all these men who pursue her which one she finds most attractive and will pick him of all the men who pursued her. Men have to the be the cream of the crop of all the men who pursue her to get with her but most women will inevitably be desired by a lot of men. Men, on the other hand, have to get a woman to desire him and have to compete with other men who may have pursued the same woman. Men also fall in love faster than women according to studies, so they are more interested in her because when men pursue, of course men get attached quicker especially when it's harder for them for dating. She has to decide whether to accept, reject, continue dating, or ghost.

Additionally, statistics now show that among young adults, young men are now less likely than young women to have had sex in the past year. Although men are often slightly more likely than women in the past few decades to have had no sex in the past year, the gap is really big now.

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Even another study confirmed this to be true that young men ages 18-24 were less sexually active than women ages 18-24.

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According to Pew Research 2020, in October 2019, 51% of men ages 18-29 were single compared to 32% of women that age, and 27% of men ages 30-49 were single compared to 19% of women that age. There is a minuscule difference in prevalence of singles among men and women ages 50-64 (27% of men that age and 29% of women that age were single), but 49% of women over 65 were single compared to 21% of men that age, but this is because women are more likely than men to be widowed since men die earlier than women on average, men are more likely to remarry (including being more likely to remarry after widowhood), and women are, on average, younger than men in marriage. Also, single men were more likely than single women to say they're looking for a date. Among single people ages 18-39, 67% of single men were looking to date and 33% weren't whereas 61% of single women were looking for dates and 39% weren't. Among singles over 40, 55% of men were looking to date and 42% were not whereas 71% of single women over 40 were looking to date and 29% were not.

Also, among people looking to date who found it difficult to find a date, 56% of women said it was hard to find someone who meets their expectations compared to just 35% of men, 65% of women compared to 45% of men said it was hard to find someone looking for the same type of relationship as them, and 52% of men compared to just 35% of women said it's hard for them to approach people. This means women can't the right guy despite finding men who do desire them while men are struggling to approach women and are unable to pursue. The single women found men who liked them even if she didn't like him but men struggled to pursue women and find a woman who liked them.

Men are also more likely than women to be later-in-life virgins, and guess what? Later-in-life female virgins are more likely than later-in-life male virgins to finally lose their virginity. In fact, while hardly any of the later-in-life female virgins resorted to hookers, it's possible that some later-in-life male virgins resorted to hookers. The percentage of later-in-life female virgins continued to decrease a lot faster after 25 than for male later-in-life virgins. What's noteworthy is that the female virgins probably didn't use hookers but some of the male virgins possibly did as a last resort.

Studies consistently show that most involuntary virgins (virgins not by choice) are men: "In every study reporting reluctant virginity, there were more male than female reluctant virgins; in fact, the majority of reluctant virgins were always men."

In a Swiss study called "Virgins at age 26: who are they?", they found that 58% of 26 year old virgins were men. The authors report: "The main reason for not having had sex for females was I have not found the right person (46%) followed by I want to wait to be married (19%) and for males I have not had the occasion (47%) and I have not found the right person (19%), respectively." In fact, in the pivotal study "Involuntary Celibacy: A Life Course Analysis", a majority of the virgins, singles (people who are currently sexually inactive but may have had some sex long ago. This includes those who only used hookers or surrogates.), and dead bedroom marriage people were men, but the partnered celibates still had more women than the singles and virgins. A majority were still men among partnered celibates.

Unattractiveness lowers men's chances for finding a partner but it doesn't lower women's chances

Even women who have unattractive traits don't struggle much at all while men with unattractive traits do. For example, studies have shown that autistic women are far more likely than autistic men to experience sex or relationships. Autistic men were found to be way less likely than neurotypical people to be in a relationship or sexually active. This wasn't nearly as true for autistic women, just to a limited extent was this true for autistic women. In one study, autistic women weren't even less likely to experience their first relationship than neurotypical women (although they were less likely to have had sex or their first kiss), but autistic men were way less likely than neurotypical men to experience any of these things. In fact, autistic women were way more likely than autistic men to experience any of these things and a majority (but not vast majority) of autistic women had sex or their first french kiss before. A vast majority had kissed with mouth closed before, too. Most of the autistic men never had sex yet, and most did not have their first french kiss yet. Some had kissed someone with mouth closed before or have had a relationship before, but many of the autistic men haven't done those two yet either. Only half of them had held someone's hand before. The autistic women were even more likely than the neurotypical men to have had a relationship before. There is some evidence I've heard online (including anecdotes) that many autistic women even date neurotypical men. In another study, 44.6% of autistic men said they never have sex but the vast majority desired sex a lot. 50% of autistic women said they never have sex but 42.5% never desired it and 15% desired it less than once a month (compared to only 10.3% of autistic men desiring it less than once a month and only 3.6% saying they never desire it). Of autistic people who did have sex, many only had sex once in a while rather than often. Not that many had sex regularly. 46.2% of the autistic women and only 16.2% of the autistic men were in a relationship. The vast majority of the neurotypical men and women were in a relationship.

Ugliness also made it harder for men than for women to find a partner. For example, studies have shown that ugly men were more likely to be adult virgins but this wasn't particularly that true for ugly women. In fact, studies have shown that ugly men had less sex partners and attractive men had the most sex partners, but ugly women had more sex partners than attractive women had the least sex partners. The fattest women had the most sex partners and most casual sex and skinny women had the least sex partners and least casual sex. Ugly men and attractive women had the least casual sex and attractive men and ugly women had the most casual sex. Ugly men and attractive women had the least sex partners and attractive men and ugly women had the most sex partners. What's the reason for all of this? Probably because physically attractive women, studies show, have the highest standards but this wasn't true for physically attractive men. Men with high status and highest potential to be a good provider had the highest standards, but physically attractive men did not have high standards. Attractive women will be the most selective and only pick the cream of the crop and has a low acceptance rate for which of the men who pursue her she will be partners with because she's pursued by men way more than most women are, making her choosier, so she can get a long-term, monogamous relationship with a guy and is in monogamous relationships for a long period of time, and doesn't sleep with men who pursue her as easily, making her number of partners low. Because men pursue, women get pursued, and because men have lower physical standards and standards in general than women, ugly women may have gotten pursued by many men and are more open to having sex with more of them than attractive women will because ugly women are the least choosy compared to other women.

Ugly men probably don't have very high standards, and studies show that inexperienced men have lower physical standards than other men do, so ugly men, being less sexually experienced, might have lower physical standards than men in general but physically attractive men don't have higher standards than men in general, and ugly men have less sex partners and are more likely to be virgins while attractive men have more sex partners than most men and are less likely to be a virgin. This means that ugly men are less desired by women and cannot find a partner as easily as other men, and they have less casual sex and will stick to more relationships because women, despite valuing looks for relationships and thus probably rejecting ugly men for relationships, value looks even more for flings than for relationships, which means if ugly men get anything, it's more likely to be a relationship than casual sex. Attractive men, on the other hand, are often desired by women more easily, and women will only give men they personally find very attractive a chance for casual sex (as I mentioned earlier), so attractive men can sow their wild oats and sleep around more. Attractive men don't have high standards and will sleep around, and ugly men, if anything, have lower physical standards but still will fail to find a partner as easily and will have mostly a chance only with relationships (if anything).

In a study, they found that ugly men had lower chances of finding a partner but not ugly women (except for working class women). In fact, very unattractive women are more likely than unattractive or average women to be married by age 29. This wasn't true for very unattractive men.

Women's dating preferences are a vicious circle for men who struggle attracting women and a virtuous circle for men who are chick magnets.

Studies have confirmed the preselection theory of women being attracted to chick magnets. Studies have shown (and you can look it up) that women are attracted to men who have girlfriends/wives and are attracted to men who other women find attractive. In fact, when women were asked to rate men, upon being shown what other women rated him, they changed their ratings to match that of other women, showing that women have copycat dating preferences. This is exemplified by video redpill interviews with random women where a group of them talk about their preferences and they all just suddenly agree with each other. Women also are attracted to confidence, but those chick magnet guys got confidence just because women found them attractive to begin with. And men who struggle to find a partner lack confidence because they could never find a partner. Their confidence or lack of confidence didn't just come out of thin air. That's something people tend to never realize. Women expect him to be confident, he cannot always be available, she's more attracted to him when he isn't trying to pursue her or when he ignores her, because it suggests he's taken or has tons of options and she isn't good enough. It suggests he's a prize who other women want. Men will be more attracted to a woman who other men might disagree about whether she's attractive or not because there's less competition while women like a guy who has a lot of women competing for him because she doesn't need a guy who lacks competition who she can get more easily because she's already being pursued by men to begin with so finding a guy who is more available and has less competitors is unnecessary. When a man even replies back instantly, women call it desperate. Women find desperation unattractive, but chick magnets lack desperation because dating and finding partners is so easy for them they don't need to be desperate, but if any man who struggles is desperate, struggling made him desperate because he needs to put in much more effort. Desperation didn't cause his struggle because what else caused desperation? It doesn't come out of thin air.

So in conclusion, women's dating preferences/behaviors give advantages to the already advantaged and disadvantages to the already disadvantaged. It's a virtuous and vicious cycle, respectively.

Why women are more selective

It's not because of evolution and women needing to select which men has the best genes or breadwinning skills. This idea that men must sow their wild oats and impregnate tons of women to populate the Earth and women must decide which men has the best genes or breadwinning skills is a flawed evolutionary theory and is just the reason why society socialized men to pursue and be initiators, and women to get pursued and be gatekeepers. In fact, the men pursue, women get pursued rule is why women are choosier than men. In fact, female promiscuity was actually evolutionarily adaptive sometimes. The reason women are more selective is because men pursue, women get pursued. This makes women have many men pursue her who she may or may not like while men desire 100% of the women they pursue, and women get pursued by men so much, they have so many options to choose from, making them choosy. Men have to lower their standards to increase the number of women they pursue because women are choosier and might reject them, and men will desire 100% of the women they pursue, so when searching and pursuing, they will have lower standards while women get pursued and decide if they like him or not and they may or may not be someone she likes. Men won't know if the woman will like him back, so in order to increase his odds of finding a woman who will, he must lower his standards to increase the number of women he pursues. This is why women are choosier. In fact, in a speed dating study, when women pursued, they were less choosy.

If women pursued, men got pursued, men end up being pickier and women are less picky, and this was found to be true in a speed-dating study. This is the Sadie-Hawkins effect. Men aren't hardwired to have low standards and fuck anyone they see and women weren't hardwired to be choosy. Social situations and socializations caused this.

Additionally, it's easier for women to be attractive-looking because men have to rely solely on their genetics for being attractive (your muscles, haircut and clothes don't compensate much for your face and height and penis size) while women can put on makeup which makes them look more attractive (studies show people find women with makeup more attractive). Women decorate their appearance more than men and makeup helps while men have to solely rely on their own genetics. Men don't even value height as much as women do.

It's easier for men to attract gay men than attract straight women

In a study using experimental methods (in case self-unaware people say they'd date a bisexual when subconsciously they wouldn't) to see how willing people are to date a bisexual, they found that gay men were more romantically/sexually attracted to men regardless of the target man's sexual orientation than straight women are attracted to men regardless of the target man's sexual orientation.

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The dating world needs to change

If women pursued, men got pursued, it would possibly be harder for women than for men. In fact, if women had to pursue and men didn't, I promise you that there'd be campaigns against it and feminsits would be protesting to make men pursue just as often by now. Society needs to get rid of this men pursue rule, it just gives women the upper hand in the dating world. It makes it easier for women when it comes to dating and sex and finding a partner for dating/sex. This is why some men think dating is a game to win and say a guy has game if he attracts women, because it does seem like a game when so many men struggle to get a woman to desire him but the vast majority of women automatically get desired because men pursue. Men have to compete with other men all the time for the same woman and women get to choose which man "wins the contest".

And the worst part? Society puts pressure on men to be chick magnets who can attract any woman they want. They don't put pressure on women to be "dude magnets" (that word isn't used as much) because people expect women to automatically attract many men because men pursue, women get pursued, so they know some men won't attract women as much and will put pressure on them to be chick magnets and stigmatize them if women reject them.

The fact that men are expected to pursue is why society believes all rape victims are women and all rapists are men. Men are initiators of sex expected to pursue, so they are expected to automatically consent to any offering of sex and do anything they can to get laid. Women are pursued, and expected to be gatekeepers and be more selective and pick the cream of the crop, so they are taught they can pick and choose which man they want, so they're allowed to say no to sex. Women aren't expected to automatically consent to sex because some men who pursue she might not like back because people always desire who they pursue but don't always desire who pursues them. Women are expected to pick the cream of the crop of pursuers instead of having sex with all of them. Otherwise, she's considered "easy" by society because it's easy for women to become promiscuous if they say yes a lot to any sexual offering but men who automatically consent to sex aren't suddenly promiscuous unless they're extremely attractive. Rape is "initiation" and women resisting or refusing to consent during rape is "gatekeeping", so people think all rapists are men and all rape victims are women. If this men pursue BS didn't exist, maybe we wouldn't have this stereotype about all rapists being men and all victims are women, or people having double standards favoring female statutory rapists. Maybe we wouldn't have catcalling, because contrary to the feminist myth that men catcall to "control women", men typically do it because they think it's a normal way to pursue women.

Society should get rid of the men pursue rule, and the only reason they haven't is because it benefits women. When inequality benefits women, nobody cares. The dating world is matriarchal, and women have the power in the dating world. This needs to change. If women had to pursue and men had it easier and were pickier as a result, this would be labeled patriarchy and feminists would've started campaigns against it by now. They need to make men and women pursue each other if they want equality in dating. Gay men pursue each other as far as i know and i think lesbians do, too, and it's easier for men to attract gay men than to attract straight women.

TLDR

Women have the upper hand in the dating world and have it easier because men pursue, women get pursued, which makes women choosier than men. And this needs to change.

@Robtical @Fat Link pin?




Testosterone exists more in males than females
Stop coping
 

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