She called me to ask what to get for me this Eid(muslim festival) and I told her to get me some shoes and a dress . For context my elder brother lives in the same city as mine but I live in my dorm and he has his apartment which is quite far from my dorm, she asked whether I visited him this week and I said no, I was out with my friend. I was lying, I didnt wanna go all the way thorugh city to see him and made up the excuse I was hanging out with a friend and she jokingly said in a taunting way that do I even have any friends and I had to lie about my old friend who is barely in my contact just to shut her up . But man this hurt as hell , its not my fault that I`m a loner its just that I have always repelled people away or they made me to leave and whenever I started fresh with the new ones I ended up making it awkward and didnt get any positive responses at all. She always makes fun of me for any shortcoming in me , whether it be my manlet self,or retardedness or autism or my fucking ugly face. I legit have nowhere to go and to feel myself safe anywhere.Its so fucking suicidefuelling but Im too much of a pussy to rope .
