After I jerk off I get a short high but crash and burn like the Hindenburg. It's so brutal. I immediately think of how I hate myself and would rather be a randomly generated character than myself. No friends, no family, no relationships, no money, no purpose. Doesn't matter what I do, where I go, who I meet, how I do it. Every night I plead to the universe that I wake up not ugly and autistic. Worst of all, this is on a good day. Never even began. 
