I gotta get these feelings out of my head, maybe its because i was lately doing too many substances, fuck ton of meth and GHB but its not the first time its happened to me, there was this one bitch called Marzia that i knew since i was 15, for many years i dreamt about meeting her atsp and having what could had been a loving relationship but instead she left me behind, used me for attention, not give a single fuck about me, accused me of being too hateful and obsessive yet she fucking knew i had BPD like no shit that i would act this way? Im a self destructive guy with emotional issues its part of the package like why complain if you already know thats part of who i am?, Dealing with constant limerence now and waking up from dreams that remind me of what could had been a relationship, only to return to reality and waking up feeling depressed and empty as fuck
But wasn't an issue for her to come out of nowhere to slide into my dms when i was actively suicidal, faking affection towards me so she could talk about her failed suicide attempts for attention and ghost me right after for no reason for months, even deleted all her socials, she also posted pics of her ''self harm'' like she was trying to prove a point but in reality nobody gives a shit, matter of fact im just gonna leak this shit
Now i sit here just think to myself, why the fuck did i waste my time talking to this mentally ill bitch? It ruined my mental health overtime as well because i was so emotionally attached that it became way too painful for me to deal with and i was young at the time as well
I regret ever talking to her, i hope she is 6 feet under rotting
But wasn't an issue for her to come out of nowhere to slide into my dms when i was actively suicidal, faking affection towards me so she could talk about her failed suicide attempts for attention and ghost me right after for no reason for months, even deleted all her socials, she also posted pics of her ''self harm'' like she was trying to prove a point but in reality nobody gives a shit, matter of fact im just gonna leak this shit
Now i sit here just think to myself, why the fuck did i waste my time talking to this mentally ill bitch? It ruined my mental health overtime as well because i was so emotionally attached that it became way too painful for me to deal with and i was young at the time as well
I regret ever talking to her, i hope she is 6 feet under rotting
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