Is a woman’s beauty of any tangible value to you if you're not having sex with her? Let that question sink in.
Consider this analogy: You have the most delicious food in front of you, but if you can’t have it, it’s no good for you. Sure, it tantalizes you, and you crave it from a distance, but that’s about it. It provides no tangible value to you nor fulfills its primary utility. By the same logic a woman’s beauty provides no tangible value to you nor fulfills its primary utility if she’s not physically intimate or romantically involved with you, beyond its admiration from a distance. This leads to my main question: Why should you pay a “Beauty Premium” when interacting or dealing with her instead of treating her as just another person at arms length?
Think about the myriad of ways men pay a ‘Beauty Premium’ to attractive women just for existing, without benefiting from their beauty in any way. For instance why should I buy a mediocre overpriced product from the hot saleswoman at the mall if she wont give me her number and agree to go on a date with me? What value does her beauty provide me? She talks to every old fart and riff raff with a smile on her face because that’s her job. Now, if I’m using the pretext of purchasing the product to get her number and ask her out, I’d be pursuing a defined goal and acting in self-interest, and that’s totally fine. But most men buy the product just because she’s beautiful without getting her number or asking her out.
Why is the prettiest girl in office treated like royalty by male colleagues, managers, and the boss despite the fact that she considers almost all of them sexually and romantically repulsive, and has absolutely no intent to date or sleep with any of them? Why are her job related requests prioritized, workload readily shared, blunders overlooked, leaves and vacation requests readily accepted, and performance rated favorably? If any of her colleagues truly thinks that by going out of the way to facilitate and favor her will give him a real chance of dating or sleeping with her, then by all means he should do it. Although, I believe attraction should be natural and shouldn’t require bribery and supplication to women, but if he’s not attractive enough and doing favors is part of his ‘game’, that’s fine because he’s acting in self-interest with a goal in mind. If you’re her boss and are going out of the way to give her an undeserved promotion or that Turkey trip on company expense, because she’s having an affair with you, you’re still committing the lesser evil by at least acting in self-interest. At least its a ‘give and take’ scenario. I’m not debating the lack of professional ethics here. But there are bosses out there who do all this for attractive female employees without getting any tangible benefits in return!
Think about rather petty everyday situations: Why does the male professor who refused to extend assignment submission deadline for students give in when the two prettiest girls of the class beg him with puppy eyes? Why does the guy at the ice cream counter generously obliges to the request of extra hazelnut toppings by an attractive girl, but ignores those of men in the queue as per managers instruction? Why does the traffic warden who stops a car for over-speeding lets off the driver without booking with a smile after realizing she’s a hot woman apologizing flirtatiously in a seductive voice? In each of these situations how did the women’s beauty benefit these men?
Before you evoke the “We’re human and just hardwired to respond favorably to beauty” argument let me clarify that humans are inherently selfish and act in their self-interest first. Paying the ‘Beauty Premium’ unconditionally without recourse is an irrational behavior that is against your self-interest and the tendency can be easily corrected by a simple thought process and asking the following questions every time you deal or interact with an attractive woman: How will this woman’s beauty benefit me? What is my goal regarding her? Is that goal realistically achievable? If the answer to these questions are ‘negative’ then you’re better off treating her as a gender-less person at arms length. Trust me, it is entirely possible to change your mindset and become goal-oriented. In fact many men are already like that. Don’t pay the ‘Beauty Premium’ aimlessly to women without a goal in mind.
And just in case your self-esteem is low enough to care about beautiful women’s opinion of you and feel compelled to do things for them to gain their approval just for its own sake, let me assure you that she most likely thinks of you as just another idiot/simpleton/chutiya she successfully manipulated that day. If anything, she will remember and have more respect for the guy who stood by his principles and politely said ‘No’ to her.
Consider this analogy: You have the most delicious food in front of you, but if you can’t have it, it’s no good for you. Sure, it tantalizes you, and you crave it from a distance, but that’s about it. It provides no tangible value to you nor fulfills its primary utility. By the same logic a woman’s beauty provides no tangible value to you nor fulfills its primary utility if she’s not physically intimate or romantically involved with you, beyond its admiration from a distance. This leads to my main question: Why should you pay a “Beauty Premium” when interacting or dealing with her instead of treating her as just another person at arms length?
Think about the myriad of ways men pay a ‘Beauty Premium’ to attractive women just for existing, without benefiting from their beauty in any way. For instance why should I buy a mediocre overpriced product from the hot saleswoman at the mall if she wont give me her number and agree to go on a date with me? What value does her beauty provide me? She talks to every old fart and riff raff with a smile on her face because that’s her job. Now, if I’m using the pretext of purchasing the product to get her number and ask her out, I’d be pursuing a defined goal and acting in self-interest, and that’s totally fine. But most men buy the product just because she’s beautiful without getting her number or asking her out.
Why is the prettiest girl in office treated like royalty by male colleagues, managers, and the boss despite the fact that she considers almost all of them sexually and romantically repulsive, and has absolutely no intent to date or sleep with any of them? Why are her job related requests prioritized, workload readily shared, blunders overlooked, leaves and vacation requests readily accepted, and performance rated favorably? If any of her colleagues truly thinks that by going out of the way to facilitate and favor her will give him a real chance of dating or sleeping with her, then by all means he should do it. Although, I believe attraction should be natural and shouldn’t require bribery and supplication to women, but if he’s not attractive enough and doing favors is part of his ‘game’, that’s fine because he’s acting in self-interest with a goal in mind. If you’re her boss and are going out of the way to give her an undeserved promotion or that Turkey trip on company expense, because she’s having an affair with you, you’re still committing the lesser evil by at least acting in self-interest. At least its a ‘give and take’ scenario. I’m not debating the lack of professional ethics here. But there are bosses out there who do all this for attractive female employees without getting any tangible benefits in return!
Think about rather petty everyday situations: Why does the male professor who refused to extend assignment submission deadline for students give in when the two prettiest girls of the class beg him with puppy eyes? Why does the guy at the ice cream counter generously obliges to the request of extra hazelnut toppings by an attractive girl, but ignores those of men in the queue as per managers instruction? Why does the traffic warden who stops a car for over-speeding lets off the driver without booking with a smile after realizing she’s a hot woman apologizing flirtatiously in a seductive voice? In each of these situations how did the women’s beauty benefit these men?
Before you evoke the “We’re human and just hardwired to respond favorably to beauty” argument let me clarify that humans are inherently selfish and act in their self-interest first. Paying the ‘Beauty Premium’ unconditionally without recourse is an irrational behavior that is against your self-interest and the tendency can be easily corrected by a simple thought process and asking the following questions every time you deal or interact with an attractive woman: How will this woman’s beauty benefit me? What is my goal regarding her? Is that goal realistically achievable? If the answer to these questions are ‘negative’ then you’re better off treating her as a gender-less person at arms length. Trust me, it is entirely possible to change your mindset and become goal-oriented. In fact many men are already like that. Don’t pay the ‘Beauty Premium’ aimlessly to women without a goal in mind.
And just in case your self-esteem is low enough to care about beautiful women’s opinion of you and feel compelled to do things for them to gain their approval just for its own sake, let me assure you that she most likely thinks of you as just another idiot/simpleton/chutiya she successfully manipulated that day. If anything, she will remember and have more respect for the guy who stood by his principles and politely said ‘No’ to her.
