BlackLowLtn
Mr. Loverman - BlackCommander of the Fourth Reich
★★★★★
- Joined
- Oct 19, 2024
- Posts
- 7,089
- Online time
- 2d 12h
Alone, that’s all I’ll ever be.
I’m just tired of ever trying, my life is an utter waste of time without the love of others, genuine constant misery no matter what I do or achieve.
So brutal that not even copes work anymore, I wish just for one shitty thing, not for a specific individual but the concept of love itself. I’m so desperate it’s driving me mad, it’s as though my entire life is flashing in front of me to mock how ludicrous such an idea is.
I’m an utter dumbass who can’t let such a urge go, no matter how much it been confirmed to me that I’m unlovable on a fundamental level, not even my parents loved me so how could I expect anything more?
The sliver of irrationality is just constantly gnawing on my mind, holy shit; I am an utter joke just like what was expected out of me my whole life. I failed life, I failed myself, I disgraced it all despite the amount of effort I put in. I don’t care about my uni, future placement, prospects, anything, the lack of purpose in it all utterly disgusts me.
bullshit. ill have to cope harder with more gym work i suppose, at least then I can pretend the world doesn’t exist outside of the moment.
I’m just tired of ever trying, my life is an utter waste of time without the love of others, genuine constant misery no matter what I do or achieve.
So brutal that not even copes work anymore, I wish just for one shitty thing, not for a specific individual but the concept of love itself. I’m so desperate it’s driving me mad, it’s as though my entire life is flashing in front of me to mock how ludicrous such an idea is.
I’m an utter dumbass who can’t let such a urge go, no matter how much it been confirmed to me that I’m unlovable on a fundamental level, not even my parents loved me so how could I expect anything more?
The sliver of irrationality is just constantly gnawing on my mind, holy shit; I am an utter joke just like what was expected out of me my whole life. I failed life, I failed myself, I disgraced it all despite the amount of effort I put in. I don’t care about my uni, future placement, prospects, anything, the lack of purpose in it all utterly disgusts me.
bullshit. ill have to cope harder with more gym work i suppose, at least then I can pretend the world doesn’t exist outside of the moment.





