Introducing 'TriedAndFailed'

[TriedAndFailed]

Hi all,

New to the forum so thought I'd introduce myself. I'm 26 and still a virgin, consider myself involuntarily celibate although I know that the 'normies' (I don't typically use this kind of terminology!) would consider that a lie, e.g. because I could just sleep with a prostitute or something. A combination of things, including being a virgin still at this age has been a great source of misery for me for quite a long time. I consider myself above average attractiveness, intelligence and also approached a lot of women, also 6ft, keep in good shape due to MMA sparring/training and am a little lazy but have ambition (I just need to wait for those sporadic bursts of inspiration to get me off the interwebz ). I don't want to say I'm depressed (I'll leave that to a psychiatrist/psychologist) but I've definitely been feeling down for ages. Really and truly, it's sad that I haven't been able to fix this one aspect of my life (celibacy) because I feel I have a lot else going for me

Sometimes, I go online and I do google searches like, 'why can't I get a girlfriend', 'what can I do to get laid', etc. and tbh all the responses suck: 'be more confident' (I think I'm fairly confident); 'hit the gym' (ok, I slack off on the weights more than I should but I am pretty physical and if you're doing MMA, those guys are definitely making you do your circuits!); 'approach more girls' (look, I have already had the balls to approach plenty of girls and still do from time to time, what do you want me to do? risk getting a restraining order!?). Then there's all the nice guy b.s. guys being like "I'm nice to girls, why can't I get a girlfriend" and feminists being like "well, you're not genuinely nice then!" or "you've got nothing else going for you!" ... assumptions much? It basically means the guys like me doing all the self-improvement stuff, NOT expecting women to owe me anything and NOT being fake-nice or anything but actually showing some balls and assertiveness ... well anyone else that's in the same boat as me (well tbh I've never really met anyone like that, not even online) we're just lumped into the category of these rapey weirdo guys. No offense to guys that are just bad looking or whatever.

Well, I'll make more posts like that but for now just want to keep it short. My username is 'TriedAndFailed' because to be honest, that is me - I tried to be successful with women and to be honest I failed. Many women (not all women!) nowadays are encouraged by western culture to be very superficial and prissy - especially if they are attractive anyway. Their standards for what makes a good approach is just too high: they don't realise how difficult it is to think of something unique and interesting about a woman to say to her right off the bat without resorting to physical compliments or generic opening material. On the whole I'm pretty frustrated. I would have called myself 'TryingAndFailing' because I'm still technically giving the whole thing a shot but to be honest I'm just pretty drained. I don't see any success with women in my immediate future. I could bust my arse off at the gym, run around town scaring off women and read a bunch of articles on investopedia in the hopes I get rich but realistically, I don't think I'm going to get that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow anytime soon and I can't really be bothered. I'll still put in a bit of work here and there because sheer boredom and frustration will drive you to that more than anything else but I really don't expect anything.

I look for pretty much any vent when I'm not putting the effort in - frustrated google searches, typing out respectable, non-profain and thought out forum posts or youtube comments ... also try to convince people that not all incels are these Elliot Rodger-esque serial killers ... I just try to bring some sanity into the whole 'nice guy' debate and the misconceptions people have about incels but don't know why I bother. This is the internet after all. The way things have been going, I probably won't get laid by the time I'm 30 at which point I'll just go ahead and get a hooker because let's face it, if you're still a virgin at that point you've got no chance. Probably already don't. I know that all the PUAs and self-improvement gurus would say this kind of pessimism is just self-defeating but you know, I have immersed myself in what they think is a 'positive mindset', I really have and it's never worked any of the miracles these self-professed experts bang on about. I really wish that 90% of these guys would shut down their websites and stop selling their overpriced products, they never helped the vast majority of guys they profess to be of assistance to.

Anyway that's me, hope to speak with you all reading my post later (I prefer to communicate by posts on here than private message, thanks).

 

[Deleted member 2299]

Buy a sex doll. Problem solved.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

^Seems unnecessarily expensive when you can just get some lube and watch porn  :bigsmile:

 

[Deleted member 2299]

^Seems unnecessarily expensive when you can just get some lube and watch porn  :bigsmile:

It's the closest thing you'll get to experiencing an actual woman. If you're content with fucking your hand you wouldn't be posting here.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Thanks for the vote of confidence  :heh: 

Well maybe that's true, but I don't think I'd be content with just a sex doll either. I don't know about you but it's more about self-esteem than physical pleasure for me.

 

[Deleted member 1627]

Suck ma cawk

 

[Deleted member 2299]

Thanks for the vote of confidence  :heh: 

Well maybe that's true, but I don't think I'd be content with just a sex doll either. I don't know about you but it's more about self-esteem than physical pleasure for me.

It's the same for me. We seek validation. Unfortunately Western women are heartless and have chosen to deprive us of it.

 

[edgein]

Welcome. Can you give any example of date where you did not score?

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Welcome. Can you give any example of date where you did not score?

Thanks. Yeah I can give quite a few actually. First date was when I was 21, I wasn't really into the girl but I'd never been on a date before and badly wanted experience. Did not sleep with her although I probably would not be so choosy now. Then again it's not like she gave me that option, I got really drunk during the date because there was a credit card limit so I had to buy two drinks at a time and it was kind of weird because after 30 minutes, probably should have politely made a mistake but awkwardly carried on even though I ran out of conversation material at that point.

Another girl was in my halls when I was ~22, she actually took me back to her room (I'd bought her a few shots that night, but this isn't the way I want to go about getting girls), I knew she had a boyfriend but I was pretty desperate to be honest. Made out with her but I couldn't get hard though and felt awkward and embarassed because she was sucking on it (I was worried about stds, etc.). there'd been a scene where I'd got into a physical confrontation with some guys on my floor because they wouldn't fuck off out the room, then one of them snuck up behind me and armlocked me until I calmed down.

I have a few more stories which I can share if you're interested.

It's the same for me. We seek validation. Unfortunately Western women are heartless and have chosen to deprive us of it.

I know the feeling. But I think it's important for both of us to remind ourselves, we're not owed anything. I just personally hate the way (some) women play games.

 

[edgein]

Thanks. Yeah I can give quite a few actually. First date was when I was 21, I wasn't really into the girl but I'd never been on a date before and badly wanted experience. Did not sleep with her although I probably would not be so choosy now. Then again it's not like she gave me that option, I got really drunk during the date because there was a credit card limit so I had to buy two drinks at a time and it was kind of weird because after 30 minutes, probably should have politely made a mistake but awkwardly carried on even though I ran out of conversation material at that point.

Another girl was in my halls when I was ~22, she actually took me back to her room (I'd bought her a few shots that night, but this isn't the way I want to go about getting girls), I knew she had a boyfriend but I was pretty desperate to be honest. Made out with her but I couldn't get hard though and felt awkward and embarassed because she was sucking on it (I was worried about stds, etc.). there'd been a scene where I'd got into a physical confrontation with some guys on my floor because they wouldn't fuck off out the room, then one of them snuck up behind me and armlocked me until I calmed down.

I have a few more stories which I can share if you're interested.


I know the feeling. But I think it's important for both of us to remind ourselves, we're not owed anything. I just personally hate the way (some) women play games.

You're supposed to get her drunk as fuck, not yourself lol. It's like you did not even wanted to fuck her. And the other girl, it's due to your attitude. 'You're not owed anything? Some women?' See these whores for what they are bro, they are pieces of meat that live to be fucked. All of them, all women are like that. They owe you with their life, it is a honor to them that you took your time to meet their whore bodies.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

You're supposed to get her drunk as fuck, not yourself lol.

Hmm ... well, could work, then again, in some circles that could be classed as non-consensual sex.

It's like you did not even wanted to fuck her.

Not really but she did not seem that into me either, so doubt me actually trying to fuck her would have made a difference.

And the other girl, it's due to your attitude.

First sexual experience and like I said, the whole situation was awkward and embarassing. That was 4 years ago. You live and you learn.

'You're not owed anything? Some women?' See these whores for what they are bro, they are pieces of meat that live to be fucked.

I can tell you that thinking like this has definitely never helped me personally.

They owe you with their life, it is a honor to them that you took your time to meet their whore bodies.

I suppose it all depends who you ask.

 

[Kointo1]

Please put an avi on your profile! It'll give us a small glimpse of your interests and your personality.

 

[Harvey_Weinstein_Hero]

Have you ever been disganoised with anything?

 

[edgein]

Hmm ... well, could work, then again, in some circles that could be classed as non-consensual sex.
Again with the attitude. Don't date feminists if you're worried about that.

Not really but she did not seem that into me either, so doubt me actually trying to fuck her would have made a difference.
Alcohol will make her reveal her true desires. If she does not want fuck you, she will get up and leave.

First sexual experience and like I said, the whole situation was awkward and embarassing. That was 4 years ago. You live and you learn.
Indeed.

I can tell you that thinking like this has definitely never helped me personally.
You can't switch between it. You need to take the red pill on women's nature to get it.

I suppose it all depends who you ask.
No. Don't unicorn it.


But go on, maybe there's something more. What happened after you were 22, did you try to improve? How you failed?

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Please put an avi on your profile! It'll give us a small glimpse of your interests and your personality.

OK I have chosen george st-pierre, who is an mma fighter that does gymnastics to keep in shape when training. A lot of yoga stuff I do is bordering on gymnasium anyway due to the intensity of the isometric exercises and stuff, so I'm pretty interested in gymnastics as a whole and anything related to strength (powerlifting, calisthenics, etc.).

Have you ever been disganoised with anything?

Not officially, however it was suggested I have pragmatic language disorder when I was late speaking, a condition similar to asperger's but not technically recognised as being on the autistic spectrum, which quite frankly makes me confused :skeptical: . I feel I have overcome a lot of the language barriers and social difficulties this condition presents, however. I guess you could say I'm 'spectrum-y' .

[/i]Again with the attitude. Don't date feminists if you're worried about that.

I don't know about you but I don't know everything about a woman, her psychology and the full extent of her personal belief system just from going on a date (or two). Anyway, it's not like that perspective is totally illegitimate. If a girl's plastered to the point she can barely move or speak, how can you just assume she consents. You can't, because you don't know. It's the same reason fucking someone while they're asleep is classed as non-consensual, to protect those who would not give consent in such a situation, rather than facilitate the fetishes of those who wouldn't mind.

Alcohol will make her reveal her true desires.

Or make her think you're a creep for trying it whereas before she thought you were a decent guy and would have considered you. Anyway, it's not like I've never been on a date, or hung out with a girl where she drank alcohol. Most girls are not going to have more than a drink or two, not the intelligent ones I tend to end up on a date with anyway. That's because they are more savvy.

If she does not want fuck you, she will get up and leave

Not if she's got any social skills or grace whatsoever.

You can't switch between it.

I've gone through phases, believe me.

You need to take the red pill on women's nature to get it.

This, posted from r/DeadBedrooms pretty much sums up exactly what's wrong with red pill:

'anything unique to redpill is almost certainly misogynist and unscientific, and anything useful in red pill (improve yourself, set reasonable boundaries, leave a relationship that isn't satisfying you, what people want and what they say they want aren't necessarily the same) is not unique to red pill.'

But go on, maybe there's something more. What happened after you were 22, did you try to improve? How you failed?

Well, after I did my undergrad I hung out with and did day game with some PUAs quite a bit. Actually argued with a few of them quite a bit because they were pretty sold on this macho red pill b.s. and anti-feminism. Now, I'm not a feminist but don't fucking push that crap on me, if you want to believe it, alright but keep it to yourself. These guys are very socially aggressive though, a mix of guys not all that good looking or young either.

Well, anyway, I did improve at approaching and talking to girls, not as much as I would have liked but I did get better. I went on a few other dates, managed to get two girls back to my apartment on two different occasions and I used a ruse that we could go for a picnic then just went to my place for the food. One girl came in, and she came another time later as well when I had her watch a movie. She got uncomfortable when I tried to escalate and made an excuse to leave. She didn't want to see me again. The other girl did not want to come in, but waited for me to get the stuff for the picnic. This was two years ago and there were a few more dates I had around that period but they didn't involve bringing anyone back. More recently I had drinks with a girl on two occasions, we went to the fair as well but when I asked her how she felt about me she said she was kind of in a relationship with a girl at the time, wasn't 100% sure if it was an open relationship type of thing or committed because they hadn't fully discussed boundaries then. Kind of waiting on her still and I will be seeing her around at some point, but not going to get my hopes up at some mad FFM threesome if that's what your thinking.

 

[Kointo1]

OK I have chosen george st-pierre, who is an mma fighter that does gymnastics to keep in shape when training. A lot of yoga stuff I do is bordering on gymnasium anyway due to the intensity of the isometric exercises and stuff, so I'm pretty interested in gymnastics as a whole and anything related to strength (powerlifting, calisthenics, etc.).

Alrighty

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Alrighty

:bigsmile:

 

[gstvtrp]

Lots of relateable stuff in here. I like you.

 

[edgein]

I don't know about you but I don't know everything about a woman, her psychology and the full extent of her personal belief system just from going on a date (or two). Anyway, it's not like that perspective is totally illegitimate. If a girl's plastered to the point she can barely move or speak, how can you just assume she consents. You can't, because you don't know. It's the same reason fucking someone while they're asleep is classed as non-consensual, to protect those who would not give consent in such a situation, rather than facilitate the fetishes of those who wouldn't mind.


Or make her think you're a creep for trying it whereas before she thought you were a decent guy and would have considered you. Anyway, it's not like I've never been on a date, or hung out with a girl where she drank alcohol. Most girls are not going to have more than a drink or two, not the intelligent ones I tend to end up on a date with anyway. That's because they are more savvy.


Not if she's got any social skills or grace whatsoever.


I've gone through phases, believe me.


This, posted from r/DeadBedrooms pretty much sums up exactly what's wrong with red pill:

'anything unique to redpill is almost certainly misogynist and unscientific, and anything useful in red pill (improve yourself, set reasonable boundaries, leave a relationship that isn't satisfying you, what people want and what they say they want aren't necessarily the same) is not unique to red pill.'


Well, after I did my undergrad I hung out with and did day game with some PUAs quite a bit. Actually argued with a few of them quite a bit because they were pretty sold on this macho red pill b.s. and anti-feminism. Now, I'm not a feminist but don't fucking push that crap on me, if you want to believe it, alright but keep it to yourself. These guys are very socially aggressive though, a mix of guys not all that good looking or young either.

Well, anyway, I did improve at approaching and talking to girls, not as much as I would have liked but I did get better. I went on a few other dates, managed to get two girls back to my apartment on two different occasions and I used a ruse that we could go for a picnic then just went to my place for the food. One girl came in, and she came another time later as well when I had her watch a movie. She got uncomfortable when I tried to escalate and made an excuse to leave. She didn't want to see me again. The other girl did not want to come in, but waited for me to get the stuff for the picnic. This was two years ago and there were a few more dates I had around that period but they didn't involve bringing anyone back. More recently I had drinks with a girl on two occasions, we went to the fair as well but when I asked her how she felt about me she said she was kind of in a relationship with a girl at the time, wasn't 100% sure if it was an open relationship type of thing or committed because they hadn't fully discussed boundaries then. Kind of waiting on her still and I will be seeing her around at some point, but not going to get my hopes up at some mad FFM threesome if that's what your thinking.

Did you really try to explain to me how every woman is a special unicorn, how drunk sex is rape, how women just love nice guys, how the red pill is misogynistic and how feminists are not that bad? Get the fuck out of here.

 

[Kointo1]

This, posted from r/DeadBedrooms pretty much sums up exactly what's wrong with red pill:

'anything unique to redpill is almost certainly misogynist and unscientific, and anything useful in red pill (improve yourself, set reasonable boundaries, leave a relationship that isn't satisfying you, what people want and what they say they want aren't necessarily the same) is not unique to red pill.'

The redpill is shit, but not for these reasons. Women deserve rape if they don't give ugly males sex. The sexual revolution caused this. The blackpill is where to go.

---

Did you really try to explain to me how every woman is a special unicorn, how drunk sex is rape, how women just love nice guys, how the red pill is misogynistic and how feminists are not that bad? Get the fuck out of here.

Seems like a normie to me...

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Lots of relateable stuff in here. I like you.

Thanks man! I just hope this forum doesn't turn out to be too extreme, because it would really help to relate to some (moderately opinionated) like minded incels.

Seems like a normie to me...

Lol, anything but...anything but!

 

[gstvtrp]

Thanks man! I just hope this forum doesn't turn out to be too extreme, because it would really help to relate to some (moderately opinionated) like minded incels.


Lol, anything but...anything but!

I think of myself as being pretty moderate.

But normies would say my beliefs about hypergamy are extreme. They also think I can just "go on tinder" to get laid.

 

[Kointo1]

Thanks man! I just hope this forum doesn't turn out to be too extreme, because it would really help to relate to some (moderately opinionated) like minded incels.

Lol sorry but that unfortunately won't be me.

[video=youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8u-jkbPg6vo&list=RD8u-jkbPg6vo[/video]

 

[TriedAndFailed]

I think of myself as being pretty moderate. But normies would say my beliefs about hypergamy are extreme.

Yeah, it's weird. Like any other site or in real life, I'd probably be arguing with feminists not these guys. It kinda goes to show that you've got to be careful with sites like this because it's definitely not real life.

They also think I can just "go on tinder" to get laid.

Tbh, I figured out a while back how to get messages and organise dates online. I could probably get laid through online dating. Thing is, I got to the stage where I'm like, fuck it I want success in real life. Most normies wouldn't understand, thing is they don't see how my pride has been obliterated being a virgin this late in life. If I don't get laid approaching in real life, I won't see myself as a real man. I already know that's fucked up (and insanely difficult for me anyway) but that's just the way it is.

 

[gstvtrp]

Yeah, it's weird. Like any other site or in real life, I'd probably be arguing with feminists not these guys. It kinda goes to show that you've got to be careful with sites like this because it's definitely not real life.


Tbh, I figured out a while back how to get messages and organise dates online. I could probably get laid through online dating. Thing is, I got to the stage where I'm like, fuck it I want success in real life. Most normies wouldn't understand, thing is they don't see how my pride has been obliterated being a virgin this late in life. If I don't get laid approaching in real life, I won't see myself as a real man. I already know that's fucked up (and insanely difficult for me anyway) but that's just the way it is.

You are wasting an opportunity to get some dating experience and trying to find a way out of this.

 

[Kointo1]

I think of myself as being pretty moderate.

[video=youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ObpcGNCU944[/video]

 

[VLÖ]

You are wasting an opportunity to get some dating experience and trying to find a way out of this.

I'm pretty sure this is just some cucknorman infiltrating. No incel would say shit like "I'm too man to get laid via tinder", unless they we're seriously looking to get shit on.

 

[Kointo1]

I'm pretty sure this is just some cucknorman infiltrating. No incel would say shit like "I'm too man to get laid via tinder", unless they we're seriously looking to get shit on.

I don't think he knows any better.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

You are wasting an opportunity to get some dating experience and trying to find a way out of this.

Guess if I was more of a feminist, I would blame 'toxic masculinity'.

How decent is the moderation on this site? I don't want to get into legal trouble for visiting it due to extreme content uploaded by its members. I already scanned it with onlinelinkscan which said it was alright.

 

[VLÖ]

I don't think he knows any better.

In that case I recommend going to /r/TheRedPill .

 

[Kointo1]

Guess if I was more of a feminist, I would blame 'toxic masculinity'.

How decent is the moderation on this site? I don't want to get into legal trouble for visiting it due to extreme content uploaded by its members. I already scanned it with onlinelinkscan which said it was alright.

The moderation isn't the problem when it comes to "extreme content". The mods do a fine job not censoring most things.

---

In that case I recommend going to /r/TheRedPill .

It would probably be a better option.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

I'm pretty sure this is just some cucknorman infiltrating. No incel would say shit like "I'm too man to get laid via tinder", unless they we're seriously looking to get shit on.

Lol. If I was 'too man' or whatever, pretty sure I would have got laid by now. Believe it or not, most of us on here will have stupid reasons for being incel, like we think we're only entitled to super hot chicks, or we're too good for prostitutes etc. If we're honest with ourselves, we know it's b.s. but at the end of the day we have standards and it's human to have standards. You have yours, I have mine. Live and let live.

The moderation isn't the problem when it comes to "extreme content". The mods do a fine job not censoring most things.

You probably wouldn't be saying that if someone uploaded some illegal shit on one of the threads that ended up in your cache folder.

 

[VLÖ]

Lol. If I was 'too man' or whatever, pretty sure I would have got laid by now. Believe it or not, most of us on here will have stupid reasons for being incel, like we think we're only entitled to super hot chicks, or we're too good for prostitutes etc. If we're honest with ourselves, we know it's b.s. but at the end of the day we have standards and it's human to have standards. You have yours, I have mine. Live and let live.

Wow, you're trying extra hard to be a condescending jackass. I admire that.


These people are not incels, we call them VOLCELS. aka voluntarily celibate. People who CAN get sex but are just too entitled to accept it because "they think the girl is 2 ugly eww!". There's standards, but then there's rubbing it in people's faces. It's like a guy complaining to a starving man "ohh mann, this sandwich has MAYO in it! ughhh, man I can't eat this, it's disgusting." and then just throwing the sandwich away.

Also BTW, fucking prostitutes doesn't count as leaving inceldom.

 

[Kointo1]

It's like a guy complaining to a starving man "ohh mann, this sandwich has MAYO in it! ughhh, man I can't eat this, it's disgusting." and then just throwing the sandwich away.

I love that analogy.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Wow, you're trying extra hard to be a condescending jackass. I admire that.

Awe, shucks.

These people are not incels, we call them VOLCELS. aka voluntarily celibate. People who CAN get sex but are just too entitled to accept it because "they think the girl is 2 ugly eww!". There's standards, but then there's rubbing it in people's faces. It's like a guy complaining to a starving man "ohh mann, this sandwich has MAYO in it! ughhh, man I can't eat this, it's disgusting." and then just throwing the sandwich away.

By any regular definition, a voluntary celibate typically doesn't have sex because they're waiting for marriage or something. I would have banged a girl by now, it's not because of some religious reason, or ethical monogamy, whatever.

Also BTW, fucking prostitutes doesn't count as leaving inceldom.

Well either you can stick your dick in a vagina (you're not celibate) or you can't (you're celibate). So unless you're in prison or you got your dick cut off, I can't see how you could truly consider yourself incel (by your standards). If you fuck a prostitute, you stuck your dick in a vagina, so congratulations because you're no longer a virgin.

 

[Kointo1]

You probably wouldn't be saying that if someone uploaded some illegal shit on one of the threads that ended up in your cache folder.

Don't worry. From my experience there's been nothing illegal posted on here. Maybe some gore here and there, but I don't think that's illegal.

 

[mylifeistrash]

There's no such thing as trying to get girls, lmao.

You can't alter your genetic code.

Either women like your genetics or they don't.

That's it.

 

[Kointo1]

There's no such thing as trying to get girls, lmao.

You can't alter your genetic code.

Either women like your genetics or they don't.

That's it.

Yeah. You're stuck with your face and height. It's over.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Maybe some gore here and there, but I don't think that's illegal.

The legality not to mention ethics of it is certainly questionable.

There's no such thing as trying to get girls, lmao.
You can't alter your genetic code.
Either women like your genetics or they don't.
That's it.

Oh alright then, I guess I'll just quit.

 

[VLÖ]

Awe, shucks.


By any regular definition, a voluntary celibate typically doesn't have sex because they're waiting for marriage or something. I would have banged a girl by now, it's not because of some religious reason, or ethical monogamy, whatever.


Well either you can stick your dick in a vagina (you're not celibate) or you can't (you're celibate). So unless you're in prison or you got your dick cut off, I can't see how you could truly consider yourself incel (by your standards). If you fuck a prostitute, you stuck your dick in a vagina, so congratulations because you're no longer a virgin.

They're not waiting for marriage, they're waiting for some magic Stacy to come and fuck them. And if you insist on using the textbook definition, I can just as easily call you a voluntary virgin as well. But that still doesn't change the fact that your "struggle" is chump change.

And no, paying for sex doesn't mean you're not incel anymore. We have plenty of users here who have fucked escorts and they're just as incel. You stop being an incel when you get sex for FREE. That's the cut off.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Yeah. You're stuck with your face and height. It's over.

But musculature you can improve, dress sense and hair cut you can improve, your charisma you can improve, your skin you can clean up, your social skills and ability to talk to women, your business accumen and ambitions can be developed

...

the list goes on.

---

They're not waiting for marriage, they're waiting for some magic Stacy to come and fuck them.

Well, umm not the christians and not ethically monogamous people (who might just be waiting for some long term commitment, not necessarily marriage). You can't just assume. Those are the guys I distinguish myself from, you can't call me voluntary celibate (in that sense) because I'm not waiting for 'the one', I don't expect the first girl I sleep with to be my last. I just want her to be the same league as me and for me to be the one to make the first move in real life, not the internet. That's because of the way it's hurt my masculinity to be a virgin involuntarily this long. So if anyone has been able to overcome that particular barrier and has useful information for me, that would be greatly appreciated.

And if you insist on using the textbook definition, I can just as easily call you a voluntary virgin as well.

Well yeah, in a sense: I could have slept with a less attractive girl, paid for dates, gone to a prostitute or hooked up with a girl online. But those were not my standards, I have not been able to sleep with a girl by my own standards, so I have not been a virgin voluntarily, whereas a true voluntary celibate might have had a girl who already was guaranteeing him sex but they both wanted to wait until marriage or some sort of long-term commitment. That is the reason I am not voluntarily celibate in the true sense.

But that still doesn't change the fact that your "struggle" is chump change

It's been a massive blow for my self-esteem and caused me to feel very low for a long time, maybe even depressed, so definitely not chump change. I would have achieved so much more with my life if it wasn't for this one thing holding me back. Anyway, Elliot Rodger who so many guys in the incel community seem to idolise had pretty similar standards to me, after all he only wanted to date blonde white girls.

And no, paying for sex doesn't mean you're not incel anymore. We have plenty of users here who have fucked escorts and they're just as incel. You stop being an incel when you get sex for FREE. That's the cut off.

I agree, I'm just saying if you want to be literal about it, you are not involuntarily celibate, as long as you can have sex. There's nothing in those two words specifically that says you have to pay for it.

 

[VLÖ]

Well, umm not the christians and not ethically monogamous people (who might just be waiting for some long term commitment, not necessarily marriage). You can't just assume. Those are the guys I distinguish myself from, you can't call me voluntary celibate (in that sense) because I'm not waiting for 'the one', I don't expect the first girl I sleep with to be my last. I just want her to be the same league as me and for me to be the one to make the first move in real life, not the internet. That's because of the way it's hurt my masculinity to be a virgin involuntarily this long. So if anyone has been able to overcome that particular barrier and has useful information for me, that would be greatly appreciated.

I'm talking about the people on this site, not christians. Just install tinder and get fucking laid already. I don't understand why you're trying some bullshit here since you've obviously said you can get sex easily. GO DO IT! Stop making some excuse about "wanting to make a move in RL".

Well yeah, in a sense: I could have slept with a less attractive girl, paid for dates, gone to a prostitute or hooked up with a girl online. But those were not my standards, I have not been able to sleep with a girl by my own standards, so I have not been a virgin voluntarily, whereas a true voluntary celibate might have had a girl who already was guaranteeing him sex but they both wanted to wait until marriage or some sort of long-term commitment. That is the reason I am not voluntarily celibate in the true sense.

And this is where we reach a problem, you're too entitled. What rating are you? Most men universally go for women 1-2 points lower than them, unless they're Chad. If you're Chad, then I'd like you to fuck off. If you're not, then you got to accept that men date down and women date up. You're not going to achieve anything by being stubborn. And yes, you are a voluntary virgin, no point in trying to debate that. You could get sex but you feel like you deserve better than them.

It's been a massive blow for my self-esteem and caused me to feel very low for a long time, maybe even depressed, so definitely not chump change. I would have achieved so much more with my life if it wasn't for this one thing holding me back. Anyway, Elliot Rodger who so many guys in the incel community seem to idolise had pretty similar standards to me, after all he only wanted to date blonde white girls.

And what has been holding you back? We've established that it can't be your virginity since you could have easily lost it. By your story you're not ugly either. You claim to be NT. Sooo... what's your issue exactly?
And fyi, people focus on the bigger picture. In ER's case, despite him lusting only after blonde girls he brought out how shallow women were. That's something we can agree on.

 

[Kointo1]

The legality not to mention ethics of it is certainly questionable.

The legality of it isn't questionable. Live leak posts those kinds of videos everyday and they aren't shut down by the government or anything like that.

And fuck ethics. Morality is for the weak.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

The legality of it isn't questionable. Live leak posts those kinds of videos everyday and they aren't shut down by the government or anything like that.

Well I'm pretty sure watching someone get raped, tortured or murdered is pretty illegal.

And fuck ethics. Morality is for the weak.

Without ethics, communities would lack cohesion, the family unit would lack compassion and support, individuals would be completely self-centred and narcissistic looking out for themselves and themselves only which would lead to social break down. By contrast, men with strength of character practice honour, decency, family values and integrity. These men are strengthened, not weakened by their love of humanity because they know that without compassion, there is nothing left to fight for.

 

[mylifeistrash]

The legality not to mention ethics of it is certainly questionable.


Oh alright then, I guess I'll just quit.

"quit"




There is no trying. That's like saying you "quit" being human.

Once again, this is genetics and you're not going to change it one iota. 

Women either like yours or they don't.

 

[vancha986]

No offence but I think you belong to r/redpill. You are a Volcel not an Incel. I can't get a girlfriend whatsoever because I am ugly af and have crippling social anxiety. I am  22 and haven't had a single relationship. I am dead inside. You have a much better life and better chance to improve your life. Don't waste your time here with ugly virgins.

 

[Kointo1]

Without ethics, communities would lack cohesion, the family unit would lack compassion and support, individuals would be completely self-centred and narcissistic looking out for themselves and themselves only which would lead to social break down.

That's a positive effect of it. Society must fall.

---

Well I'm pretty sure watching someone get raped, tortured or murdered is pretty illegal.

If it was then liveleak would've been shut down long ago.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

I can't get a girlfriend whatsoever because I am ugly af and have crippling social anxiety. I am 22 and haven't had a single relationship. I am dead inside.

Sorry to hear.

You have a much better life and better chance to improve your life. Don't waste your time here with ugly virgins.

I see it more along the lines of introspection, it's not a complete waste of time therefore, because this kind of discussion helps me iron out my own self-belief system. But thanks for the heads up.

Stop making some excuse about "wanting to make a move in RL".

That's my standard, I won't budge on that until I hit 30.

Quoting myself, not you:

Well yeah, in a sense: I could have slept with a less attractive girl, paid for dates, gone to a prostitute or hooked up with a girl online. But those were not my standards, I have not been able to sleep with a girl by my own standards, so I have not been a virgin voluntarily, whereas a true voluntary celibate might have had a girl who already was guaranteeing him sex but they both wanted to wait until marriage or some sort of long-term commitment. That is the reason I am not voluntarily celibate in the true sense.

Here I should have said 'could have *maybe* slept with' blah blah blah ... emphasis being on *maybe*.

And this is where we reach a problem, you're too entitled.

Well, let's be honest most of the people on this site are entitled.

What rating are you?

That's subjective but I'd give myself a 7 with potential to reach 8, e.g. if I work harder at the gym, get the look I'm going for, e.g. with plastic surgery I could strengthen my jaw line. Also my hair's going to look pretty bad ass once it's grown into the style I'm looking for, just looks a bit awkward at the moment but that's temporary.

And what has been holding you back?

Well apart from somethings I will mention later, personal circumstances have held me back. For example, for certain reasons I haven't been able to get a job and a lot of decent girls out there won't date a guy if he's not employed because it makes him seem irresponsible. I know that's not the case for me but it's how it look. A lot of girls are also monogamous and would (perhaps judgementally) frown upon by promiscuous attitudes, or attempts to sleep with lots of women. I guess they'd see me as a 'player wannabe'.

We've established that it can't be your virginity since you could have easily lost it.

I didn't say I could have easily lost it. There were definitely opportunities where I didn't quite seize the moment and maybe times where if I'd persisted I'd have got what I want. But that's all 'coulda woulda shoulda but didn't' isn't it? We don't know. These girls could have came back to my place and been like, "6 inches? That's it?" Or ... "I dunno, I'm just not feeling it tonight", etc.

By your story you're not ugly either. You claim to be NT. Sooo... what's your issue exactly?

I didn't say I was neurotypical, actually:

'Not officially, however it was suggested I have pragmatic language disorder when I was late speaking, a condition similar to asperger's but not technically recognised as being on the autistic spectrum, which quite frankly makes me confused :skeptical: . I feel I have overcome a lot of the language barriers and social difficulties this condition presents, however. I guess you could say I'm 'spectrum-y' .'

This condition has in the past made it very difficult to interact with people, especially because of the difficulties with social improvisation: being imaginative, witty and funny with lots of things and stories to say. It's lead to a lot of 'umm...err...ahh' pregnant pause type of situations. I've got much better at this with time, but the difficulties are still there and subtle and plus now I have to deal with the insecurities that come with being a late in life virgin, which can be very difficult to deal with, e.g. them: "oh hey guys, let's play 'never have I ever'!" me: "umm, no I'm not sure" everyone else: "yaaay!!!" them: "ok, never have I ever had sex in a public place! never have I ever had sex in a crazy position! never have I ever participated in a gang bang!" ... etc.

So these are some of the other things that stopped me losing my virginity.

In ER's case, despite him lusting only after blonde girls he brought out how shallow women were.

Some women, yes.

 

[mylifeistrash]

OP in a nutshell:

Have shitty genetics, write a bunch of words to cope.

 

[TriedAndFailed]

Have shitty genetics, write a bunch of words to cope.

Well ok then, guess you guys can't keep calling me voluntarily celibate then